Taking your child into the class room

[kraftymiles]

My child starts school in Sept, he's a July baby and pretty confident but his mum isn't !. The school are really discouraging us taking our child into the class room from day one. We are expected to leave them in the playground to be collected. How will I ever get to see my childs learning environment or check he's happy ?. This is being done under the OFSTED blanket of safeguarding but is it really necessary. I've had a look at the OFSTED websites and Direct.gov to check but cant find the answer. Anyone experiencing something similar or can shed light on the 'proper' way to do this ?

My experience is the same as Indigo Bell's. You could take them in at 8.45 but had to leave when the bell went at 8.55. I say could, because they have recently had to stop becasue of Ofsted.

It's a real shame, as everyone, teachers, Head, parents were happy with it, the school just had a very freindly feeling. I don't feel I mix with the other parents, or teachers or admin staff at all much as I did.

On the other hand, there's no real problem with dropping them in the playground, especially if that's what they get used to.

We are allowed to take reception children into the classroom everyday. It's fine, our reception uses a different entrance, so there's no argy-bargy and we're all v. civilised. It's great being able to take her in, she can show us her work on the walls, we can say hello to the teachers/TAs, it's all v. laid back and friendly. There are 37 kids in reception, sharing 2 classrooms, 2 cloakrooms and an entrance hall.

I'm kind of shocked at the way parents are excluded from some schools. I've started dropping DD at the door in preparation for yr 1, but there's no pressure to do so.

what happens though when mum/dad has to go?
do some children not get upset and start crying then teacher or ta has the job of settling them down. Also what about kids whose mum/dad dont go in classroom do they get upset?
MY dd2 school had Sports Day last week and even at this late stage where kids have been in reception for nearly a year there were a number crying when Mum and Dad had to leave at end (our sports day on a morning)
Think it is much better for the child to give them a kiss and hug goodbye and let them go in independently. If there are any problems settling in am sure teacher is not that un caring that they would not ask to have a word with you.

Like Ixia, our reception classes have a separate entrance to the rest of the school. I don't get to do drop-offs very often, but when I do I love going into the classroom and seeing what they have been doing. The teacher and TA are always there to welcome the children and carers, but don't appear to be overwhelmed by questions - they just show an interest in how the child is that day, and parents tell them if there is anything they need to know.
On the days when DD goes to breakfast club one of the helpers leads a little train of reception children to their classroom a few minutes before the teacher opens her door. Apparently this is good because they can then choose the best place on the carpet...

We have a soft start too, and its LOVELY
We can arrive anytime between 8.30-8.50 and do the drop off
We can either help them sign in and choose their meal and go or hang around until 8.50
I havent seen much in the way of tears at all, and its so relaxed- you can always grab a quick hello with some of the other littlies an dsee how far along their smilie chart your child is
I feel very very lucky

My DD had the soft start too, and it was lovely. We could stay with our DC for up to the first 15 mins of each morning, for the first two terms. In the third term, we walked them into school, but left them at the classroom door. In year 1, they went in alone.

I think the nicest thing about it was that the parents could stay as long as necessary (the doors opened 5 mins before school started, so if you needed to rush away, you'd just get there early and stay for 5 mins earlier). However, the children never batted an eye lid, and I only ever saw one child get upset in the mornings, but she always was quite an insecure child (she used to get upset at preschool too).

It was indeed, lovely!

Yes - here foundation stage parents can accompany their children into the classroom, if they want to,and there is meant to be a 10 minute informal parental contact time before the bell goes. There's never been any problems that I can see.

Key stage 1 take their children right up to the classroom door but don't go in.

Key stage 2 take their children up to the junior doors and they go in by themselves. Nowhere in our school are children left in the playground which I'm really happy about.

busymummy3 - I've only once seen a child in tears (and she was sat on the TA's knee having a cuddle). The laid back atmosphere, seems to suit the kids v. well, there are activities set out and they just run off to join their friends at whatever activity. The parents hang up coats, say hello, chat to teachers/ TAs (who are v. chilled and usually clutching a cup of tea) or just dash in and out depending on how much of a rush they are in.

The doors open at 8.45, parents ideally need to be out by 9. The reception classes don't go into the playground before school. They share a Playground with yr1 and yr2, but there isn't room for them all outside at once.

I can understand your concern, never experienced this myself, this drop and run system. Seems a bit harsh for a child just starting school. Parent staying for a little while on the first week is allowed/encouraged in both DCs schools. In DD1's school it was a seperate area for the Reception class and with DD2's school it's going to be staggered starts.

We can go in if we want and bumble around in there until the bell goes!

Alfreda

Can I just correct your slight suggestion that schools who encourage children to be dropped in the playground are not welcoming.

My Dds school is very welcoming and welcomes all comers and has a strog connection with the parents that is part of the school philosphy.
But parents clucking over the children in the classroom every morning is unnecessary.

DD would have been mortified if I had been shushing her into her class after the first day ortwo at pre-prep.

And, as the son of a 17 year old boy... if you are still following him into the locker room at 17 he will still be losing his kit.

The children learn by having full responisibility for it. If you pack, and fetch and remind then they will continue to take no responsibility and lose stuff until the day they leave home.

I think this is something that has altered with time.

When I was a child in the late 70s early 80s mums did not come into the classroom - they rushed off home for valium strong coffee and mad lizzie on GMTV.

Then I had my 2 teen dc and it was 'expected' that you took your child into class and settled them,then after a little while school changed rules completely 'parents by appointment'......a little later and school didnt really make it easy for mums and dads to come into school but because I was a parent/helper and a nursery nurse Id always get the crying child and the head would say to the mum 'oh you go home Mrs Nicks will look after xxxxxx' so there id be with a crying child whod lost his pumps or any other random school thing and it would take me a while to sort him out when really his mum would have been best to do it.

Long winded respnse but with the pleasure of hindsight and from all positions Id say help your child be superconfident in finding his own stuff and settling into school by himself but if he is upset try to sort it out before you get through the school gates and work out a solution before he hits the classromn.

"There is an open evening over 3 weeks into the term which seems like a long time to wait to find out he is alone and not happy, I really just want to be able to peer into a window at him and see him having fun."

kraftymiles: that sounds like exactly the right length of time into term to me (both as a parent and as a nursery class teacher). Every child has a wobble at some point, it is nothing to be worried about. My PFB cried the place down every morning when I left him, but I know that as soon as I had gone he was fine. 3 weeks is a nice amount of time to have settled into a routine, have formed friendship groups (which can be totally different to the friendship groups they had in nursery school, all three of mine have different "best" friends in school to those they had in nursery, despite those children still being there). Also it is long enough for you to have identified any potential problems, which you then have an opportunity to discuss with the teacher.

I cant wait to leave dd2 in the playground and run home to go to the loo on my own

cause gecvko will be in preschool when dd2 starts school

bliss

2 and a half hours on my own

in the loo for 2 and a hal hours??

what bliss

nickschick - I agree

My mum is a loving attentive mum , but after the first day at school she didn't walk us. We walked to school with our siblings and friends on the same street.
I walked my brotherto school each morning when he was four and I was 6...

(Disclaimer : I am quite old)

We're in Scotland, and DS1 starts in August. We have a soft start too, and parents are actively encouraged to come in for half an hour for the first few weeks, and the start time is also more flexible so that the newbies can arrive once the rest of the students have gone in, so it's a little quieter.

WRT children then getting upset about parents leaving them or not coming in, I think it's mostly a matter of managing their expectations, so that you're not just disappearing.

DD is coming to the end of Yr 2 and I still take her into her classroom every day - as do nearly all the other parents. This only stops when the kids want us to. I therefore am the pack animal carrying all her kit and dumping it in the cloakroom whilst she breezes in to chat to her teacher or to show me a piece of work. It does help me to let her teacher know if there are unusual circumstances (ie doing home with other kids, grandparents etc) and to check if after school activities are on etc.

All very relaxed and all parents, teachers and children seem happy with the arrangement.

In our school the todddlers come in too.

I think they have got the balance between safety and sense right as well. If a parent spends any one-on-one time with other children (including walking them to swimming) they are checked. If they are standing in a classroom full of other children and other parents what would they need checking for?