Changing schools

[milkshake1]

My son (9) is a fairly reserved, sports hating but very active boy. He has many good friends at his primary school and outside but tends to take time to get to know people -once confident he is as boisterous as the rest of them! He is doing well in his school work although his class is large and he has a tendency to lie low.

We have a very good small, friendly private school which we originally were intending to send him to at 11 - concerns that as he is above average ability and quiet and well behaved he may do better where there are smaller classes and he is not overlooked. We can see major advantages in moving him in Sept (beginning of year 5) and giving him the benefit for a couple of years extra plus making the transition now with no more upheaval until he is 16.

New school very friendly but after two trial days although he really likes the look of the new school (as do we) he is very nervous of the change,leaving his friends and making new ones. He will still be able to see his old friends out of school but the new school is 10 miles away and I'm not sure how he will cope with the change which at this stage I do not need to put him through - or he may flourish.

He wants to go to the new school but doesn't want to leave his current one - should I put him through it or wait until he has to move at 11?

Anyone else had a similar experience?

I moved my DS at the start of Y3 to a local prep, which will see him through to 13. Like your DS, mine loved his trial days but was quite nervous for a few months beforehand.

He has loved it from day 1 and has such a wide variety of friends, is doing well academically, at sports etc.

We were originally going to wait until the end of primary as well, but I'm glad we didnt.

I think children are generally a lot more resiliant and adaptable than we give them credit for.

If he'll be moving at 11 anyway then it's better to do it now, this way he will already have friends who will be moving to the secondary school with him, this being said, the last year of primary school is a special time. If he starts the new school in year 7 then there will be other new children starting at the same time so he will not be alone. I do think it's difficult to start a new school at other times as it can be difficult for a child to make friends when everyone else is in established groups IYSWIM. If he's doing well at his current school then I'd be reluctant to move him to be honest.

Thanks everyone