DS in friendship trio. Will one always end up getting left out?

[longingforsleep]

Hi

My DS, 5.8, is in Year 1, and while generally a happy boy, he's quite immature in many ways, and struggled socially in Reception.

He's now joined an existing pair of best friends, and he plays with them, and (as far as I can see) no one else.

One of the boys he hero worships, and the other he likes too, but as they were already 'best friends', I'm worried that to some degree my son will always be the third wheel, a hanger on if you like. And if they got tired of him one day and told him to get lost, he would be completely devastated.

He's definitely regarded as the younger, slightly silly boy in the group, and gets bossed around a bit by the others. He doesn't seem to mind at all though.

I'm probably overreacting. Should I just leave well alone and try not to worry? Have suggested having other people from his class over to play, but he's not really interested...

Any advice/experience of similar much appreciated.

Your DS hasn't just joined my DS's school by any chance?

DS is best friends with another boy in his class (and neither of them really play with the other children in the class). A new boy has recently started and has become very friendly with DS's friend. DS is not (so far after 4 weeks) bothered - he has friends in the other class he goes off to play with when best friend is playing with new boy. Actually, I think it's quite a positive thing - I was a bit worried that the 2 boys were getting a bit too "intense" and it has helped to have "another" to break things up a bit.

not your situation I know but I guess it's a sign of how friendships wax and wane at this age.

No, not us! But yes, interesting to get another perspective. Thanks.

Any other thoughts?

My dd seems to find herself in groups of 3 - both at pre-school and now in reception. We did have a few issues with both children wanting to be with child A and B&C not being very nice to each other. I mentioned it to the teacher at parent's evening and she said she'd keep an eye on it and speak to the whole class about everybody being everybody's friend. Since then we've had no problems and my dd seems to play with a wider variety of children.

I think it is helpful to the child to have other friends they can turn to if their so-called "best" friends want to play something different or with somebody else. I've started inviting other children home for tea too, which I think seems to help a lot.