has anyone moved their children from one school to another halfway through?

[helyg]

This is just a musing at the moment, but I am starting to think seriously about it.

DS2 has never really settled in school. he has been there almost 2 years and just doesn't seem to be getting anywhere. He is reasonably bright, but can't concentrate in school. At home he reads and writes and loves learning, but in school he just seems to be naughty! I get called in by his teacher 2 or 3 times a week, and have done for a year or so. He hates going there, and we have tears and tantrums most mornings.

I have started to wonder whether a fresh start in a new school might be the answer. The problem is his brother and sister are happy in the school (although we are having issues of DS1 being bored and not given challenging work). If I moved DS2 should I move all three?

DD is in Reception, DS2 is in Year 1 and DS1 is in Year 2.

Has anyone moved a child part way through primary for reasons other than moving house? How disruptive is it? Has anyone moved one child but left another at the original school?

As I say it is just an idea at the moment, but it would be nice to hear your experiences.

Well we moved ds1 from private to state midway through year 3-was the best thing we ever did!

Thanks iMum.

Was there a particular reason why you made the move?

helyg

I moved ds (8) last Easter, so towards the end of Year 2, as he had (then undiagnosed) dyspraxia but was labelled as lazy by both his teacher and SENCo. It was the best thing I could have ever done for him, and I know that had I left him there the diagnosis would not have happened as quickly and the support he has would never have materialised.

I spent a couple of weeks asking myself if I was doing right by moving him, and couldn't answer (he had very low self esteem and didn't react well to change), then I asked myself the question 'Am I doing the right thing for ds by leaving him at his old school?' and the answer was a resounding NO, so I started to look at other schools and honestly believe he is now at the best school in the area for him (even though he moved from a good school to a satisfactory one).

It sounds from your post as though both your ds's are being let down by the school they are at, so you may do better by moving them, and I would say if you move two then move all three.

(On a slightly different tangent, I grew up in a forces family and went to 4 different primary schools. It suited me down to the ground however my much younger sister went to three primary schools (her first school merged with her second school if that makes sense, so in a way only two, cos friends and teachers moved with her that time) and absolutely hated it - but she had a big culture shock as well as we moved back to England from a different country at the same time.)

The simple answer is that there is nothing to stop you moving all three children to another school. However there is a practical difficulty - you need to find a school that has space in three different year groups and at present they are all infant classes.

I would think in terms of not moving until the beginning of the new school year as it will be a natural break. But I suspect that you are going to find it difficult to find a school with available places in all three year groups.

You need to go to the school and see for yourself whether you think that your children will be better off in this new school. What happens in our locality is that if a parent wants to change school the head of the school you want to go to will advice you to go and talk with the head of the current school about your issues. As a matter of courtesy they will inform the current school's head. However nobody is stopped from moving providing that there is spaces available.

I moved dd almost a year ago part way through y1, reason being she had a terrible teacher and was going to keep her for y2.
For dd it was the best thing I could have done as she has thrived ever since. Also being towards the end of the school year she was able to establish friendships, make playdates for the summer holidays etc and when she went back to school in September she wasn't even considered a "new girl"
Moving schools around here though isn't a problem as there are plenty of spaces and changing was little more than filling in a form on Friday and starting Monday after I had viewed and dd had visited of course.

I moved my 2 girls 2 years ago - DD1 was year 5 DD2 year 2. Although they are DD1 and 2 there's DS 1 and 2 above them, so I've experience of school iyswim

DD1 wasn't getting challenged, work was boring, and we'd already moved her in year 2 due to a house move, from an absolutely brilliant school to be fair. I knew how much better school could be for her, I knew she didn't have to be bored and fed up all the time.

DD2 was not learning well but was also getting the crap kicked out of her every day in the playground. She would get punched, kicked,pushed into walls. She's small and at lunchtime no one would sit with her because she was small she was made to sit at the table with the nursery children (she was P2)

Many many visits to the school, the head refused to believe me, children who were doing the bullying were children/grandchildren of people on the board of governors and from prominent local families.

Cut a long story short, there was an incident where a rope was put around her neck and the boy said "I hate you I'm going to make you dead" and he pulled both ends to choke her.

Another child saw, ran for help. Went in to see useless twunt headmaster and he said she obviously couldn't cope with normal playground rough and tumble... WTF

So, went next day to see next closest school, it was a wednesday, lovely atmosphere and I just knew right away it was a million times better, head of that school suggested bringing girls down after school, I did and DD2 said "I love this school can I start tomorrow"

Not quite lol, but she did start on the friday - took them into the old school on the thursday, told head i wanted a word and he blustered I said I'm moving them what do I need to do. He tried to dissuade me, but I stuck to my guns.

Anyway, when DD1 came back from a visit a lunchtime her class stood up and applauded that she was leaving (and the teacher let them)

DD2 came home with a card, made by some of the children, that said "We won't miss you and never forget you have foes"

They never went back to that school, started their new school on the Friday (what a ridiculous day to start school) and have never looked back.

Oh and the confrontation between me and the old headmaster on the friday about the card was rather epic.

Oh jeez I've written war and peace lol

I'd say move em they'll settle quick in the summer term and there's loads of stuff to do to help them make friends.

Thanks for all your replies.

LRB978, that sounds like DS2. I have actually asked for an assessment for him as his teacher is constantly having problems with him, even though he is nowhere near that bad at home and the paediatrician that he is under (for other problems, including slow growth, asthma and seizures... he gets a bit of a rough time of it!) doesn't think it sounds as though there is a problem. However once I asked for an assessment his teacher changed her tune and decided that his concentration was getting better and he probably didn't need one! Then, a couple of weeks later she is back to complaining about his behaviour.

knockraven that is awful! DS2 isn't having as hard a time as that, but DS1 has told me that he has heard other children provoking DS2 or being nasty to him, then when DS2 reacts they all run to the teacher to tell on him. If he says that it wasn't him that started it the teacher doesn't believe him, and even when I've been in to tell the teacher what he has told me at home she says that he is lying.

Just to clear something up, I didn't mean halfway through the year, if I moved them it would be in September (I meant halfway through primary school).

I don't think finding spaces around here would be that much of an issue, very few schools are over subscribed.

Has anyone moved just one child and left their sibling(s) in the original school?

I moved both my children, though not at the same time.
DS was unhappy at school, a bit disruptive and bored, the situation seemed to be getting worse rather than better, he seemed lost in a big school. We found a small village school for him, with a space in Y2, but they did not have room for DD, who was about to start Reception. So we left her at the previous school, where she had been to nursery, and moved DS.
It was a bit embarrassing to move one and not the other, as I still had to go into the old school every day for DD. But after a few weeks it was ok, and DD was happy at the school. We didn't have huge problems with the school itself - it just didn't suit our DS.
Getting the children to different schools, and particularly picking them up, was tricky, as the schools were not close. Lots of stressful dashing around!
Eventually a place came up for DD at the new school and we moved her too. Fortunately she settled well and both the children have done well. No regrets, though it was quite stressful at the time, and we wondered if it was the right decision. They are both at university now, so it couldn't have been too bad!

I moved dd2, leaving dd1 as she was in Yr2 and about to move schools for junior anyway. It was right to move dd2 as I really really did not like the first school's approach to learning and think dd2 would have made very little progress. However, most schools in our area are over-subscribed and I have now found out why there was miraculously a place somewhere else. Overall the new school is 'outstanding' as ofsted said, but dd2's new teacher is an NQT, not coping at all (and not really being helped) and there was actually a meeting called of parents in that class because there were so many complaints!

So I would say - yes do move - but make absolutely sure the actual experience of your child in the new class they move to will be good. I took alot for granted becaus eof the new school's reputation. I have every reason to hope next year will be fine but its been a very dodgy term!

I am also thinking about moving my two children, in particular my son. Over 5 years, the school has seen 7 head teachers and a turnover of staff of approx. 75%. There are children in his year who seem to have complex additional needs and are very disruptive, particularly when a supply teacher comes in, which is about 30-40% of the time.

We currently have our third interim head and are facing the prospect of school restructure to mix age groups. At the same time, we are introducing a new curriculum and will have 25% new staff.

Needless to say, I don't think the school will have sorted itself out by next year. My question is, am I better off moving my child with only one year left at Primary or sticking it out. He seems relatively happy and is doing OK academically, but is below average in his maths and the rest of the curriculum isn't terribly inspiring. He is resistant to changing schools and doesn't want to leave his friends. However, I am very stressed out by whether he is genuinely getting the best from his education and whether continued disruption in his class will set him up to struggle in the future.

Any advice out there from people who have been in the same situation?

iMum, are you me? Just done the same thing - moved DD from private to state half-way thro' Y3 - best thing we've ever done too!

We knew DD would settle in easily and quickly, but even we were surprised at how well it worked. Only have 1 DD so issues about moving other children didn't apply to us. DD has relished the opportunity to make new friends, have new experiences; she is very socially confident and makes friends easily, so for her it was not too hard. Obviously all DCs and schools are different but even I have been amazed at how positive the experience has been for all of us. Not one regret.

We had 4 children at the same village primary school. I won't bore you with the details but we had a huge fallout with the Head over DD1's transfer to secondary school. The DS's were at the end of Y4, Y2 and YR at the time.

DS2 has SEN and the school wasn't coping with him. He was bored and would just wander off, then they'd call us in a panic because they didn't know where he was. We ended up sending DD to a private secondary and while she was being assessed asked on the off-chance if they'd have a place for DS2. They said they'd assess him and offered him a place. He started Y3 at the new school.

Left DS1 and DS3 at the original school. DS1 also has SEN but different to DS2 and was happy and thriving at the school.

When we got to the end of Y6/Y2 we found out in the last week of the summer term that DS3 was considered "disruptive" and had spent the whole term sitting outside the Head's office They had not bothered to tell us that there was a problem

We spent a week frantically dashing round the county trying to find another school and found a place just before term ended. He started Y3 in the new school. He was upset to be leaving his friends but it was the best thing we ever did. We had the 4 of them in 4 different schools and a 22 mile school run (each way).

So only DD1 and DS1 completed their primary years in the same school.

Of course I missed out a vital few words..

asked on the off-chance if they'd have a place for DS2 in their Junior school

He clearly didn't start Y3 in a secondary school (must preview)