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DD "told off" by TA yesterday.

8 replies

stripeyknickersspottysocks · 06/05/2010 11:31

Just not sure what to do about this, or whether to do anything and just hope it blows over.

DD was upset on the way to school today, she took some Scoobies into school with her to play at playtime. She's not the only kid who takes them and they are allowed them.

She says she was lining up at end of play and holding the scoobies when the TA started shouting at her to put them away. DD says she didn't know what to do as couldn't put them away as she had no pockets and they're not meant to leave the queue. So she stands there with them (she's in Yr 4). Then TA "shouts" at DD "I'm sick of seeing with you with them, this is the 8th time I've told you" and took them off her.

DD so far hasn't been given them back. Now DD can be a bit sensitive sometimes and I'm happy to take any "shouting" accusations with a pinch of salt. She will interpret a firm telling as shouting. But I'd quite like to know what the TA expected her to do with them, plus I'd like to know if she's getting them back.

Anyway another parent came up to me this morning and said had I heard what happened as her daughter had told her that mine had been told off, etc. So it does seem like it happened more or less as DD told me.

The TA has a child in DD's year and DD is meant to be going for tea for the first time in a few days. She's now saying she doesn't want to go as she's scared. I've told her not to be daft and that teachers are different out of school, etc.

Another factor is the fact that my DD has been falling out a bit with another girl at the school. Nothing major, just low key girly squabbles and I think they're maybe both as bad as each other. But when DD has been falling out with this other girl the TA's daughter apparantly is going to her mum and saying that the 2 girls are squabbling and its upsetting her. Not that she's involved in the arguements. So I'm a bit worried that this TA is now labelling DD as a trouble maker or something. Though maybe I'm just been a bit paranoid.

Should I talk to DD's teacher or just hope it blows over?

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Wordsonascreen · 06/05/2010 11:39

Would it make any difference if it were a teacher telling off your daughter?

If it was the 8th time shes seen her mucking about with them maybe she had a point.

Pancakeflipper · 06/05/2010 11:41

I think you are linking too much together about your daughter not getting on with another child and the TA's daughter reporting back to mummy. The TA will see it from a different perspective, a good TA sees the pack element of girls in a class, the alpha females, the not alpha females.... Now unless your daughter is a right pain in the ass there will be grudge. And anyway she's been invited for tea.....

I can understand your feeling of not fair but perhaps your daughter had been told to put them away/ only have them out at certain times?

There will be another side to this and if you really need to know then ask the TA what happened.

One of our TA's is really fierce. She yells at the parents in playground. But the kids know her boundaries, respect her no nonsense firm manner and she gets loads out of them.

Pancakeflipper · 06/05/2010 11:42

NO grudge.... I missed the no out!!!

stripeyknickersspottysocks · 06/05/2010 11:44

I don't think it would have made a difference if it had been a teacher. DD says the first time she was told was when she was stood in the queue and was then repeatedly told, like one time after another. DD says she was scared as she didn't know where to go to put them away as they're not allowed to leave the line.

Maybe it was a misunderstanding and the TA wanted DD to leave the queue and put them away but it doesn't sound like she actually said that and DD didn't know what to do.

Not sure, will have to quiz DD further this evening I think. Typicals story that I get all this on the way to school this morning so not really any time to find out what happened.

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Wordsonascreen · 06/05/2010 11:56

TBH I'd see if shes been given them back at pick up today and not make a huge deal about it if she has. Children get told off all the time.They can be very wearing.

[not so fond memories of the Match Attax banning war of 2009]

[disclaimer i'm sure your dd is lovely]

admission · 06/05/2010 12:22

The key issue is when and how are they given back. They should be given back today. if they are not then I would go and see the class teacher tomorrow and ask why they have not been returned without making any fuss over the telling off. See what then happens as I am assuming that the property should be returned by the next day unless there is some other rule in operation.

hocuspontas · 06/05/2010 16:47

Unless your dd spoke up an explained the TA wouldn't know she didn't have a pocket and would have taken it as defiance. I'm surprised it wasn't returned at the end of the day but something like that could easily have been forgotten about. Probably still in the TA's pocket! Go in and ask for it tomorrow.

stripeyknickersspottysocks · 06/05/2010 16:53

DD hadn't got it back when she came out, teacher was in the playground so I asked her. She said that she'd heard that 2 girls had scoobies taken off them for messing about with them while in line. DD says she and another girl were holding an end each and "the other girl was swinging them".

So I explained to her that it would have been impossible for the TA to know who was swinging and who wasn't and that it sounds like thats why they were (quite rightly) confiscated.

God, I could shake her sometimes - talk about giving me half the story!

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