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Original poster

Help me find something diplomatic and non pushy mum to say re ds' reading books

30 replies

gleegeekgleek · 30/04/2010 15:11

Ds is in reception and has been doing well with reading. Had finished ort level 6 on the school scheme and found them really quite easy e.g. maybe 1 word a book he'd need help with and the rest he read fluently. He was understanding them fine too and reading with expression.

So the first week back of term his teacher was off sick and he got given books from a box two or three bands lower than normal. Not a big deal as these things happen. She came back and this week no one changed his book all week until today when he came home with an ORT 5 book. If he should be moving onto 7 why has he now come home with a level 5 one? A week of messing around is fine, but it's two weeks into term now...

I asked him who gave him the book in case the assistant did it again but he said he chose it from the box.

How do I deal with this without sounding annoying and pushy? What can I say?

Or should I just leave it? He reads plenty of normal story books at home by choice.

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suitejudyblue · 30/04/2010 15:26

I'd probably just say something very neutral to the teacher along the lines of "DS seems to be picking books from the wrong box, do you mind showing me so I can talk to him about it at home and make sure he knows which one he should use. Um, I think he's on level 7 now isn't he ? {innocent expression}" and hope she just goes with it.

Original poster
gleegeekgleek · 30/04/2010 15:34

Ooh good idea. I wish I could think of these things but would probably have said totally the wrong thing.

Am I right to be a bit about it or doesn't it matter?

OP posts:
suitejudyblue · 30/04/2010 15:49

IME for most people it probably wouldn't matter but I expect my DCs to be making progress and I often had similar conversations with teachers. They are now a bit older and my teacher issues have changed but I well remember conversations about reading levels.
I think as long as you make sure the teacher doesn't take what you say as any kind of implied criticism you usually get a positive response.

Original poster
gleegeekgleek · 30/04/2010 15:53

Well I will definitely go with your "oh ds is taking them from the wrong box I think" type comment - should do the job of not winding the teacher up.

OP posts:
MerlinsBeard · 30/04/2010 15:53

They may be doing a sort of secret assessment to make sure his comprehension is in line with his reading.

Just revisiting older books and asking him questions about it.

Or they may have had a reshuffle of the bxes which they often do at my DS's school. Any time someone donates books, all the boxes get a bit of a shuffle round.
Or they may be being lazy so would just write a little note in his reading record checking he is on the right box.

PfftTheMagicDragon · 30/04/2010 15:55

You don't need to worry about what you say I don't think. He is coming home with the wrong books, just think of it as if he was continually coming home with the wrong shcool bag, you would just speak to the teacher and tell them - get the right one.

Just say "DS is coming home with the wrong reading books, is it possible to get the right ones from you?"

HappyMummyOfOne · 30/04/2010 16:06

Is it definitely the same scheme? DS had various levels within the same colour band but they were different ORT schemes when I looked closer.

Original poster
gleegeekgleek · 30/04/2010 17:19

Definitely the same scheme and not some sort of secret assessment as the proper teacher wasn't even there the first week of this.

OP posts:
gingernutlover · 30/04/2010 17:32

sounds like it's all a big mistake by someone.

go in, say about him bringing home books from a lower level, ask for the ones he should be on.

If for some reason the teacher weants him to read the ones he's chosen then she will explain - likely she'll just say "oh dear, yes he should be on 7, here they are" simples!

Dont leave it, as it sounds like he's got the wrong one, for some reason.

primarymum · 30/04/2010 20:12

It could be however that the books are colour banded rather than ORT banded. A colour band can cover several ORT bands, so for example Orange band covers It's Not Fair(ORT Stage 5),Kipper and the Giant (Stage 6) right up to The Kidnappers ( Stage 8)! So if a school uses colour bands to level their books, a child could read all of these and still be on the same level!

Original poster
gleegeekgleek · 30/04/2010 21:01

Fair point and they do colour band but the last three books have been blue and he was at the end of orange last term... and finding those too easy....so it's not that.

I think it really is a mistake based on the TA showing him the wrong box - none of the books have come from the teacher so far this term so no one has corrected her.

I've put something in the diary and will have a gentle word along the "I think ds is picking up the wrong books from the wrong box" lines.

And don't start me off on the level of book I found out they did in his guided reading group...red. He is reading orange books from school so why are his group doing a red book. Sigh...

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MintHumbug · 30/04/2010 23:21

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

tikkapots · 01/05/2010 05:51

My DS often comes home with the wrong book, I always pop a note in his reading record and they reply saying the book he had chosen had been put in the wrong box. I don't think this is being pushy.

I often put notes in about reading etc. Not because I am pushy (imo) but because I care about what he is doing and want to understand, surely we are working in partnership with the school to aid learning for our kids? I am never rude or challenging but do ask questions when I have them.

Teachers may feel different?

TP

Shaz10 · 01/05/2010 06:51

It depends what's in your note tikkapots!

To be serious, I'd always prefer parents to be interested than not. If you have questions, ask! You shouldn't keep quiet for fear of putting our backs up. If you have time (yes, I know!) then I prefer face to face, but notes are fine too.

flaime · 02/05/2010 15:44

Ohh I know how you feel, I always feel pushy mum when I have to ask something like that but the teachers are normally lovely about it!

Often the TA's will look at the colour band of the book they already have and swap it for a similar one so you need to have a word - just say he picked the wrong one up and could you swap it and it shouldn't offend anyone.

Original poster
gleegeekgleek · 04/05/2010 16:19

All sorted but am mortified as the extra helper who goes in to do the reading told ds "mummy wants you to have hard books".

I bet they so think I'm a pushy parent. Argh. .

Maybe I am but I just wanted him to have a book at the same level as before rather than dropping down for no reason communicated to me.

OP posts:
annielouise · 08/05/2010 18:02

When my son was in Reception the school he was at would give them 3 books to read a week. The plan was you'd read them with the child every night. My son never liked reading the same book twice so taking the initiative myself when I picked him up I'd change the books every day and updated the reading planner every night. I was picking up late from after school care club about 5pm so not many people around and we'd just pop back to the class and choose his books for him. Not every night but pretty much. No one ever stopped us or said you can't do that. Unless you take the initiative you and your son will be forced to go at their pace which might be slower than your child's natural pace. After about level 20 (or maybe level 24) the school my son was at lumped all the books together into the main school library. Don't push your child but at least match the books to his needs. If you don't point out he's progressing faster than the school thinks he is then you'll both be frustrated. Am I a pushy mum? Not particularly, but I wasn't prepared to go at their pace to keep them happy. I judged it for myself. Were they annoyed. Not really. What can they say if he's coping with you're helping him become a better reader. Just don't push too hard so it becomes stressful but stays fun.

annielouise · 08/05/2010 18:04

Sorry, I'm not sure I answered your question. Can you hang around after school and go in and say to the teacher we're just changing his books and then sit there and go through the box to see what you both think is suitable - you and your son.

CuppaTeaJanice · 08/05/2010 18:20

My DS isn't at school yet so I have no clue what all these levels and numbers mean.

However, if your son is choosing the easier books himself, then could he be finding their themes more interesting?

Thinking back to my own childhood, at your DS's age my reading level was well above average (because my mum had taught me to read before I went to school). The teachers kept giving me books for 6-7 year olds and I found the subjects so dull. I wasn't ready to read about adventures and ships, and Huckleberry Finn, and all the things that were in these books. I still wanted to read about dogs and tractors and teddies. Yes, I could read the longer, harder words, but I got a lot more pleasure from the bright colourful pictures and stories that were relevant to my life and interests.

differentnameforthis · 08/05/2010 18:36

I had this recently with dd. Her teacher explained that just because she read all the lvl 7 books, she wasn't necessarily ready to move onto lvl 8.

They assessed her & believed she benefited more by staying on her current lvl for the time being. So they found more lvl 7 books within the school.

It is more than knowing what all the words are.

Original poster
gleegeekgleek · 09/05/2010 10:40

He is getting OK ones now - they are still slightly easy (he hardly sounds out any words and in a book of maybe 150 words he might only need help with 1 word, possibly 2) but that's fine as it definitely is better for him to have slightly easier ones to boost his confidence.

Now I have more of an issue with what is going on IN class rather than the home reading books as I've discovered that guided reading isn't ability based yet and they were doing a red level book the other day. One of the girls in his group can't blend at all yet. I just don't get how that can work but if an enlightened teacher can come along and explain how a kid reading at pretty much year 2 level and a kid who can't blend at all can work in the same group that'd be great (assuming they were looking at the words and not comprehension but even then it would be way too easy on a book like that).

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ButterPie · 10/05/2010 12:39

I vaguely remember this kind of thing happening to me. In year three the teacher took me off the reading scheme as it was pointless (not some kind of genius, just learned to read fluently quickly) so I could read anything from anywhere on the scheme.

When I went up to year 4 I happened to have read a low level book last and so I got "stuck" there. Didn't really affect me as I just started to ignore the reading homework and read my own books instead but the other kids did seem quite bothered by their reading level (my mum says I was hard work as I was so unbothered by merits, reading levels, detentions and basically most rewards and punishments...I was an awkward little sod )

jamaisjedors · 10/05/2010 13:03

You see you say you want to be a non-pushy mum but this kind of thing:

"I just don't get how that can work but if an enlightened teacher can come along and explain how a kid reading at pretty much year 2 level and a kid who can't blend at all can work in the same group"

is pushy to me.

There will always be different abilities in classes.

If your child was good at sport, would you not allow them to play in a team with "less able" kids?

FWIW, I like Butterpie, was an early fluent reader (could read before I started school).

It didn't "hold me back" to mix with other non-readers, I just helped them and read books in my own time.

I think you need to worry less and back off if your DS is doing well (unless there is some issue that you haven't mentioned yet).

Original poster
gleegeekgleek · 10/05/2010 17:47

But jamais, I have absolutely no problem with him "mixing" as you put it, with non-readers and doing whole class work a lot. I just wondered why the guided reading in smaller groups is not ability based. And indeed nothing in the class seems to be.

Of course I don't mind lots of activities together but there's a huge difference between the books they are doing in his guided reading and in class and the ones he gets sent home.

My questions are genuine as I'd like to know how it works.

And what is the definition of pushy? To me it's someone who pushes their child regardless of whether it's good for their child/ whether their dc is interested. It's someone who makes a big fuss but if a dc genuinely is at a different level to the whole class teacher is it right to just let it be given all children are meant to progress under the EYFS, and not just the average ones. I don't think that's my definition of pushy.

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muddleduck · 11/05/2010 09:26

Interesting thread.

I find myself in a constant battle to avoid being a pushy parent and I have given this a lot of thought. I've come to the conclusion that it is all about communication...

so Ds1 (june born reception) is reading ORT books that are much 'easier' than the other books that he reads at home. In my mind there are two explanations for this. Either his teacher (who obv knowns much more about all this than I do) has an good reason for keeping him on this level ... perhaps to do with comprehension or interest? Or she genuinely hasn't noticed how easy he finds these books.

I'm assuming that it is the former so I have not gone in and done the pushy parent thing. But if I thought it was the latter then I'd definnitely get involved. The issue isn't the books themselves, obv we have lots of harder books at home. The issue is that we take reading level as an indication of what the teacher thinks about our child's ability. If the teacher has somehow missed the fact that a child is capable of much more than they show in the classroom then that IMO is a big issue.

IMO a lot of this whole 'pushy parent' thing could be avoided if teachers had the time to communicate more with parents to explain why they have put a child on a certain level and how this links in with what they are doing in the classroom. If reading levels are the only regular objective feedback that a parent is getting about their child's performance at school then it is unsurprising that that there is so much muttering about them

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