Friendship threesomes...problematic?

[Runoutofideas]

My dd1 is in reception and has had a "best friend" since starting in Sept. Recently a third child has decided that she wants to be friends with dd's "best friend". Dd is happy to play with both children and understands that everyone should be friends together.
The third child however has other ideas and will not play with dd, only her friend, and actively discourages the initial "best friend" from playing with dd, which makes dd very upset. Anyone had similar problems with a threesome, and any practical solutions...?

Thanks - It's parents' evening tomorrow night. Is it worth mentioning then do you think?

Children at this age will have many best friends. try to encourage playdates with other children whilst at the same time arrange playdates alone with old BF so dd can have special time with her friend.
Its upsetting as a parent especially listening abt playtime however dont underestimate her old BF. If shes being bossed around its likely she will gravitate back to your dd.
What worked for us is finding an after school activity both girls enjoyed.
Playdates with the 3 didnt work well for us.
Hugs for your dd

Thanks
Old BF is the very youngest in the class and I think is quite easily influenced by the other girl. She does come to our house once a week, and has done for ages, which they both seem to enjoy. I've toyed with inviting the other girl too, but don't really want to have to spend the whole time ensuring they are getting on ok...
Although I understand that normally friendships are quite fluid at this age dd1 seems to be very loyal. At preschool she had 2 best friends who went on to different schools, and she still asks to go and play with them now. I'm hoping the other girl might just find other people to play with too.

The exact same scenerio happened to my dd in Year 4, she went threw 2 years of absolute hell, she was also in a class of 30 where only 9 were girls who had already established their friendships. Dd was always the one left out, the third girl had a more domineering personality than my dd and was always the first to complain to the teacher about my dd. Thankfully since my dd moved up to High School she has made friends with a bunch of girls who came from a different school, I also specifically requested that my dd was not in the other girls tutor group. She now no longer speaks to the other too.

I think you would be best to try to encourage your dd to play with other girls and perhaps invite them home. I wish I had with my dd. My dd was also forced to give up guides which she loved as the other two were "bullying" her there.

through not threw -

Arrgh and two not too

Your poor dd Fimbow - that sounds awful! I really hope dd's situation doesn't escalate like that. Probably ensuring other friends are around would be a good idea. I think she does play with plenty of other children, but she mentions the "best friend" more. I think she's fairly popular in a quiet sort of way - maybe I should start inviting other friends back for tea?

Thank you, Runoutofideas. I would encourage having other friends back to tea, I think you can gently guide them at your dd's age.

Since meeting her new friends, my dd's personality has changed tenfold. She is much more alive and happy. I would hate for what she went through to happen to someone else.

Threesomes are awful IMO. My dd is an only and very sociable, her BF was Thai/English and totally bilingual. She and dd were inseperable for about two years. Then, a Thai girl joined their class, initially BF played with both but then new girl decided that because my dd wasn't fluent in Thai she couldn't play. DD was devastated (literally) and moped around. Luckily for us we left Thailand and moved to Switzerland where she doesn't have just one BF, she tends to spread herself around.

What happened for us ( and still is) is that my dds BF is so far under the influence of the other child who appears to dictate who can play and who cant depending on her mood that my dd can now see how her old BF isnt free to join games with the majority of children.
The two have become quite cliquey and detached from the rest of the children. My dd is loyal type and cant understand why its happened but has opened herself up to new friends at school.
Teacher says this is why the school policy is to re-mix the children at the end of each year.