Advice for mum of child aged 3.0 who is reading already (phonetically) - how will it be by school age?

[StrikeUpTheBand]

I was hoping someone could advise. I have a DS who seems to be very much above average for his age at the moment with his reading and with his numbers. I am a primary school teacher myself so I am aware of him from a teacher's point of view as well as a parent. However, I have no idea what to expect when he gets to school and was wondering if anyone whose child was similar at this age would tell me how it was for them?

He recognised numbers and counted to twenty before age 2 and is now only just 3 and can read and recognise numbers up to 100 and can count beyond 100. He can do simple addition and subtraction using fingers, can count mostly accurately objects to 20. Reading wise he's known his letters and the sounds they make for a while, and a few months ago started blending them. Then with Alphablocks on TV he really took off and is now reading decodeable words (albeit not fluently enough to read a book, he can read a simple sentence). He also has a great imagination and makes his toys all talk and have personalities (!).

I just worry about him, knowing how pushed teachers are and wanted to know it panned out for similar children? Did they make adequate progress at school? Did they enjoy reception?

I just want to emphasise that I have tried hard to let him lead because I believed there was plenty of time for school stuff later - it has been mostly led by him - I have not coached him or forced anything at all.

Thanks for any input .

Agree that it depends on the school and teacher. My DS, at three, was reading fluently and counting ad infinitum (I remember a v long car journey when he stopped at three thousand. He was just under three at the time). He started school in the last term of Reception (summer baby, and I didn't want him at full-time school until he was closer to five), and the teacher immediately put him on to free reading and maths extension work. Y1 and Y2 teachers did likewise; he's now in Y3, and is definitely not bored. He's still miles ahead of his classmates in everything except handwriting and football (as he missed most of Reception, he never learnt to write 'properly', and doesn't like having to do so now - and he hates all ball games). But I am full of admiration for his teachers, who have done a superb job. Quite apart from keeping his mind busy, they have also identified areas where he is less advanced (most notably socialising with his peers), and have worked hard with him on that score. Again, I think they have been fantastic.

But here comes the disclaimer. It's a small prep school: there were 12 in his class until this year, when the number rose to a whopping 18. The teachers know all the children's strengths and weaknesses, and have the time and resources to respond accordingly. We did feel that none of the state schools in our area would have been able to deal with DS so effectively.

Op my ds is like yours but we are in the Scottish system so pre schoolers are not taught Reading at all, even though he was Reading unsupported, the biggest problem I have found since starting school is that he is being given extra volumes of work and he is frustrated at not being able to play as much as his peers, he has gone from lots of free play to concentrated work, I thought you might like the other perspective, my ds is being taught at his level but not his age and I feel for the staff because it's hard to find the balance.

DS1 was about the same stage as your DS at 3 - I remember him being able to spell phonetically (e.g.he tried 'goat' as 'gote', could spell 'happy'). By the time he started school at 4 years 8 months he was reading chapter books - My Naughty Little Sister, for example. His maths was equally advanced.

I think the way the school handled him was really good. Within two days they asked me what he was reading at home and tried to send back appropriate books. They sent him up to year 1 for literacy and gave him extension work in maths, and worked hard to differentiate work for him. Then we moved and the new school sent him up to year 2 for maths, and then gave him special work in Year 2 (it was an infants school). In Year 3 the next school sent him up to year 5 for maths, but it all fell apart in Year 4 because the teacher didn't like that strategy.

In Year 5 and 6 we asked to educate him at home one day a week and did lots of extension work with him that way. All the way through we tried to extend him 'sideways' with lots of music (two instruments) and so this time last year he got a music and an academic scholarship to a very academic private grammar school - where he is still at the top of the class.

I'm not trying to say this boastfully but to show that he is really very able, and was obviously so from an early age but we have still managed to educate him mostly through normal classes.

What I have learned is that:

1. almost everything depends on the attitude of the class teacher and some teachers are a lot more receptive to being flexible with able children than others. Out of 7 primary school years we had two unhelpful teachers, when he went backwards because he wasn't being stretched. It was always worth stepping back and letting them discover how able he was first before telling them!

2. You can do an awful lot to help your child outside school hours if you don't think things are going well at school - and if you and the school are prepared to think outside the box, something like flexi-schooling can be great. I look back on my one day a week with DS as lovely times.

3. There are lots of things that school gives kids apart from academic achievement - and the socialising in Reception is one good example of that. I think I was most proud at the end of DS's time at primary school when his head said that he was the most 'normal' able child he had ever met. He had great friends there, and even if everything in class wasn't always at his level he was still able to get something out of it.

Sorry for the epic post!

Fantastic post LadyPeter. Has really made me think.

My DS sounds just like the OP's - same age, same abilities.

Pixie, I really don't think this is the norm at all - not that I think all children who achieve this are geniuses, but it's a question of exposure. The fact that all your children can do this demonstrates very strongly that it is the exposure that they have been given at home which has enabled them to achieve this. So you should be taking the credit!

My DS's nursery teachers comment from time to time about how "clever" he is, and I always counter that it's just because at his previous nursery they exposed him and his peers to a higher level of input than most nurseries do, and followed the children's lead. Having left that nursery I have continued what they started, still going at his pace, and he laps it up.

Very useful thread, thanks StrikeUp. I shall especially beware of any dodgy teaching that tries to insist that DS remains at a lower level than he's capable of - any such teachers shall get short shrift from me!

Speedy, I do agree that it's partially exposure, but also I think these children often will have good pattern-matching skills or a good memory or are generally very sharp in another way (Ds was very good with shape sorters and jigsaws from an early age too). I don't think it means he'll be a genius, just that he's a very bright little boy. The thing is that at just turned 3 he's reading, yet he is only just mastering going on the potty .

PS. From a teacher's point of view, I would say that the best way to ensure your school keep helping your child make progress and don't let them 'coast' is to keep records of what they can do and ensure that the 'baseline assessment' that they do of your child at the beginning of a year is accurate, as if this is recorded then the teacher will have to make clear progress with them over the year and be shown to have moved them on in their learning. I say this because if your child is already achieving all of the objectives of a given year, it will be more of a risk that the child won't make progress unless effort is made by the school - they will have to adapt the curriculum significantly, and it's about more than just giving them work for the year above.

Great post, LadyPeter. My DS currently has a music/academic scholarship from Y3 until he's booted of his current school in Y8. Am very much hoping for similar at 13+!

Um, 'out' of!