Do you participate in your childrens PTA and how do you find it?

fufflebum · 2010-03-08T16:32:22+00:00

As a newbie to PTAs I am wondering whether you participate in your schools PTA. I was amazed at how few people attend the meetings at our school. I went along to see what it was all about and have got involved in more things than I had anticipated because of lack of numbers. It appears that some of the personalities on the committee are not very popular within the wider school but I am keen to not get involved in this political side of things and try and raise some funds for the school. Am I naive? How have others found their schools PTAs?

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Finbar · 08/03/2010 16:36

Get in there girl...it's the only way to break up any perceived cliques. I say 'perceived' because often they are the only people who will volunteer to do anything and then get pilloried for being to cliquey.

Anyway - you ahve done the right thing. I did it for a few years and it was great. Hard work when you know your school has 250 children and only a committee of 7 Mums - but ho hum.

paulaplumpbottom · 08/03/2010 16:39

I chair our PTA. I know what you mean about "personalities" as we have had an issue with this.

Coming from the States I was shocked by how few people actually do PTA. My daughter goes to a school with around 350 students and our biggest meeting had 15 people at it.

It does mean a lot of extra work and getting volunteers is difficult but its a great way to get involved at the school and get to know the staff. Planning the evnts have been really fun. Its mostly the politics I find really annoying.

My DD told me the other day that she loved seeing me at school decorating, organising etc. She said it made her proud and that was all I needed to hear really.

Original poster

fufflebum · 08/03/2010 16:46

It is interesting that so few people seem to get involved. Perhaps it is not just our school but a common thing. I can understand people not having the time etc. I do not want to be perceived as cliquey or sucking up to the school. I remember my father being involved in my school and I feel that it raises extra money for things that the school cannot afford to buy. It is a shame that it is perceived as something else!

OP posts:

debs227 · 09/03/2010 10:21

As a member of our PTA, i am always approached by parents who want to tell us how to spend the money, but these parents never turn up to meetings or help out!! We are a very small group of 8 and for instance i was the only one to turn up to help at our last event. i really want to leave as am finding it quite alot of hard work now.

BUT!!...A reasonably sized, well organised PTA would be great to join, and yes it is very rewarding when it all goes well.

gremlindolphin · 09/03/2010 10:41

Being involved with PTA things is great. There will often be historical politics but that doesn't mean you have to join in with it! Low involvement numbers is common across most schools and does makes things hard work but it is usually fun!

paulaplumpbottom · 09/03/2010 13:11

Its a pity we couldn't have a PTA thread. We could exchange fundraising ideas, and get general advice.

TulipsInTheRain · 09/03/2010 13:30

I'm on the playschool committee atm and that's taking all my spare time but will volunteer on the PTA as soon as i can con someone into convince someone to take my job at the playschool... I'm treasurer and my accounting skills are seriously not up to the job!

I used think the playschool committee were cliquey but really it's just that there's such an enormous amount of work that everytime we see each other at school and playschool we generally have things to discuss and on top of that spend a fair bit of time arranging meetings to get stuff done.

Lycraphobe · 10/03/2010 05:04

I'm on the PTA too. It is perceived as a bit cliquey, mainly because the PTA parents know each other well so they tend to chat to each other in the playground. They would all love new members though, not least because you find yourself doing more than you think is fair, just because others won't volunteer.

But the children enjoy the events, it does raise money for the school and coming to the events help parents to feel involved in the school.

My only complaint is with the head. She is only human and it is her school so no problem that we have to stick by her rules, but its like having a manager who changes her mind all the time and you never know she's changed her mind until you've got it wrong. Typical I know for many working people, but it grates more when you are giving your time for free!

SofaQueen · 10/03/2010 06:03

I'm on the PTA (only PA at our school) and I really enjoy it. It often times is a thankless task, but It allows me to know the teachers and administration, as well as other parents. It isn't perceived as cliquey, but I agree with Lucraphobe's first paragraph.

No real complaints, not even about apathetic parents as I do feel it is their right to avoid doing school-related activities if that is what they want to do.

gorionine · 10/03/2010 06:37

Numbers seems to be a wide spread problem in PTA. Saddly it means that something has to give. In our school it is the numbers of events because we are running out of ideas. The quality of the is good though as we tend now to know what we are doing. It would be great if people could snap out the peception that PTA is clicky, it becomes clicky because nobody joins IMHO not the opposit. When very seldomly a new member appears, it is usually a new parent to the school who wants to get involved.

"Its a pity we couldn't have a PTA thread. We could exchange fundraising ideas, and get general advice."

I suppose if we were to start a "What events does your PTA organise for fundraising?" and bump often enough to keep it on actve threads we will get some people to share ideas? I am off to start it on other subjects, come join me!

gorionine · 10/03/2010 06:50

Come here for ideas sharing!

I am off to start breakfast but will be back bumping sometimes this morning!

gorionine · 10/03/2010 10:18

Can anyone who has been in a PTA for longer than me tell me if they feel it is harder now than it was maybe 5/6 or more years ago to get parents to take part in events or get financially involved?

It seems that whatever we try to organise parents think :

we are asking for too much of their time
we are "always" asking for money (and too much of it)

BTW, change of plan come here instead of previous link, please

alardi · 10/03/2010 14:37

I hate to say this, but i've had a load of negative experiences with our PTA; I have posted anecdotes about it on MN: thread titles like 'Should I give up on our PTA?' and was told overwhelmingly YES!!!

Atm, there's a woman who is important part of the PTA who I once had a shouting match with; years ago she badly alienated ppl when she was on the preschool committee, & I reckon she's doing it again. She does a lot of work but she also moans nastily about lack of help from others... But then dismisses help from the likes of me if I ask (and that was before we ever had X words).

The good news is PTA characters change often, so maybe a different crowd will come in one day that will be nicer to work with.

Also, me personally, I am pants at fund-raisers. I can do well at admin, digging holes, helping in class, or stocking shelves, I need to do those types of volunteer work, instead.

alardi · 10/03/2010 14:39

I hate to say this, but i've had a load of negative experiences with our PTA; I have posted anecdotes about it on MN: thread titles like 'Should I give up on our PTA?' and was told overwhelmingly YES!!!

Atm, there's a woman who is important part of the PTA who I once had a shouting match with; years ago she badly alienated ppl when she was on the preschool committee, & I reckon she's doing it again. She does a lot of work but she also moans nastily about lack of help from others... But then dismisses help from the likes of me if I ask (and that was before we ever had X words).

The good news is PTA characters change often, so maybe a different crowd will come in one day that will be nicer to work with.

Also, me personally, I am pants at fund-raisers. I can do well at admin, digging holes, helping in class, or stocking shelves, I need to do those types of volunteer work, instead.

ElbowFan · 10/03/2010 16:25

I think PTAs go in 'phases'. I got involved when my ds and dd were in Primary after the parents all received a letter from the then committee which ranted at length about the efforts they went to for other peoples' children, and all the hard work and effort they put in for no thanks etc. This was a letter announcing the AGM and seeking volunteers! It was so appallingly worded that I was not alone in being furious when I read it, believing that I could do a better PR job, if nothing else so maybe it had its effect. In truth I think they'd just got stale and bitter. The new committee was all of a similar mind; we wanted to raise funds, but also have some fun along the way. Our outlook encouraged others to join in, giving what time they had. Its not all about meetings and organisation, more about getting others to share in the fun side of school. Children come and go and so do committee parents. If you want to get involved try offering your services for whatever man/womanpower is needed at the next event - facepainting Easter Bunnies, selling cakes, raffle tickets... and see if you feel welcome and comfortable. You'll see the politics more clearly from closer to!

paulaplumpbottom · 10/03/2010 16:57

I was thinking about maybe having a BBq ofr the incoming P1 parents so they could get to know eachother and meet the PTA members. Is this a lost cause?

BessieBoots · 10/03/2010 17:02

I like being on the PTA! I'm new to the area and made lots of friends that way...

ElbowFan · 10/03/2010 17:03

Well IMHO its a great idea - warmth and welcome will reap rewards when you want volunteers!

paulaplumpbottom · 10/03/2010 17:09

Thats what I am hoping. I was hoping to make a good impression before they are told not to do it because its life draining. Thats what my friends all told me.

easylife73 · 10/03/2010 17:42

I agree with BessieBoots - I joined the PTAs when we moved house and the kids changed school/preschool. I wanted (a) to meet soem new people myself and (b) to show the kids that if they wanted to make new friends that had to make a little bit of effort to get to know new people.

So I ended up treasurer for the preschool, and am now on the PTA of both the infant & junior school. I have met some lovely people, had a lot of laughs and hopefully helped to raise lots of money for the schools.

Sometimes we look clicky, but liek someone else said, it's because a lot of the in-between-meetings organisation is done on the playgrouond.

If you volunteer your services or go to the next meeting I honestly think they will be delighted to see you. Just don't go disagreeing with things that have been done the same way for years straight away....

Original poster

fufflebum · 10/03/2010 20:03

Thanks for your replies so far I am pleased to hear commonalities with my experience too!

It seems such a shame as I think most people who participate are doing so for 'the right reasons' IYSWIM.

I have decided to persevere with my attendance and help out where I can. My oldest child likes me being involved in her schooling in this way (at the moment!). If it all becomes too much or I don't want to participare any more.

I find it a shame that some other parents like to complain but do not get involved themselves. I guess it is like wider society some folks like to give up their time (however small it may be) while others choose not too. That is how it is. WE choose how to spend our time.....

Thanks for the input. I think a PTA thread would be great as ideas could be shared!

OP posts:

McDreamy · 10/03/2010 20:16

My children have just started at a new school and in order to meet a few more parents/friends I have joined the PTA. I too am amazed at how few volunteers there seem to be.

I also get the feeling there are some "personalities" that have been around for a long time and seem to come out with the age old phrase "we don't do it like that here" where other newer members come out with some new ideas.

I think we need a social event just for the committee to get to know each other a bit better in the hope that it would lead to better team work but not sure what to do/suggest esp as I am the "new girl"

alardi · 11/03/2010 12:14

Whoops! Didn't mean to post that twice (had massive delays here at the time).

bibbitybobbityhat · 11/03/2010 12:29

They have a terrible reputation, generally, school ptas. I have seen threads on Mumsnet where perfectly nice rational mumsnetters whom I have long admired have spat venom about the very notion of the pta!

I am involved but not too deeply involved in my school pta. I do not have the energy or a thick enough skin to be chair or treasurer but, sure, I organise a few events a year and help out at as many others as I can. Yes, often its the same old faces all the time. I have no problem saying 'no' though when I can't or don't want to do something. If I overheard anyone accusing me of being part of a pta clique I would give them a piece of my mind!

abgirl · 12/03/2010 16:15

No I am not involved but mainly because the PTA tend to have their organising meetings during the day and I work full time. Instead I have become a governor which is taking up an increasingly large amount of my spare time. I always support their events though.