how would you phrase this?

[thecloudhopper]

I am currently wriing a report on my 1-1(who has behaviour issues) for a emergncy review meeting well to cut a long story short I want to say that he displays some very manipulative behaviours at times and has a range of things he does in order to try and get out of doing things.. how do I write this without being ofencive?

He displays a range of strategies for task avoidance

I think its ok to say he tries to manipulate his adult and give examples of what they are

BUt I think you should say why you think he wants to avoid certain things, does he avoid work he thinks he cannot do or does he have issues with concentration

that sounds good, BTW his mum gets easily offended so this report is hard to write. I am also trying to day that one of these behaviours is crying that he switches on and off - His mum thinks he is distressed but this is not the case so how do i say this in a non offencive way.

I can see why you want to be tactful but I think it is probably better to tell the truth than to worry about the mother - he's not going to get the help he needs if you withhold any information.

Re the crying - "I believe that there are times when X's distress is exaggerated for effect".

I don;t think you should say 'I'

Say something along the lines of 'XXXX appears to become very upset when asked to do a task. He then calms down if he believes he does not have to do the work set for him' Would that cover it?

yes- normally I would be plain speaking but as his mum has made an official complaint about teacher and has caused no end of problems. Although i do like what you have written.

this is really helpful thanks.

How about, "when faced with a task that he perceives to be beyond his capability X will sometimes choose to engage in 'task-avoiding' behaviours such as crying. He rarely exhibits these behaviours in other situations and they cease as soon as the undesirable task is no longer required of him".

that sounds good - sometimes it is so useful to hear other peoples ideas.

THANKS ALL