Stemming on from the bright child thread.....

[Lulu1981]

though I would outline my predicament a bit more and see if anyone can offer some advice.

I have 2 daughters in the same mixed class, 1 in Y1 and the other in reception. It is very very small school of 19 kids. Mainly boys.....

DD2 is marginally above average from what i can tell, and is soooo ready to be taught, she enjoys reading at home and phonetically spells out words, not always correctly but she tries, she can add simple 2 + 2 etc, so for a little girl not even 5, i think she is doing well. The problems I have is the school failed their Ofsted inspection last year, on their foundation unit, may I add consited of my older daughter and 1 other child both of qhich are emotionally mature for their years. So this year the school have gone into over drive following their interprataion of the EYFS.

I work on the school grounds, and for the first 8 weeks saw DD2 wandering about doing very little, my husband and I met with the teacher (who is also the head) to discuss why, it occured to me that this is probably more to do with her class mates, 2 emotionally young boys and a disabled child. So we agreed that DD2 would go in with the Y1 & Y2 children, well as you can imagine this has all stopped again. From what I can gather no or very little phonics or number work is done.. couple with the lack of learning, she is also having problems settling as the older children get annoyed with her and she ends up getting hit. So both academically and socially i feel she is being effected. In a years time 2 of the 2 of the 5 girls under 7 will be leaving. I see this is a huge problem.

What should she be learning and do you think I am right to worry about the social aspects of having no friends her own age.

if you need more info please ask ;-)

If 2 are leaving your post reads as if there will be 3 girls (including your 2) under 7 in the entire school? Are there a huge number of boys or is it a tiny school? We have a private school near us that often has 6 in a class. Parents choose to send their dcs there and then end up moving them because of the small numbers meaning a 5 yr old ends up inviting 9 yr olds to their party et.

Is there a reason why you have chosen this school that isn't apparent from your post? If I were in the same position I would be seriously contemplating changing schools.

yep, oh and 1 little girl that will be going up in September. So that'll be 4 including mine. There are only 19 in the school, there are 3 older girls in years 5 & 6.

We moved 1 week before my eldest was due to start school and the village school seemed ideal. at the time 26 kids brilliant ratios, and in all fairness DD1 has done really well there, they out her in with the Y1's and academically she flew, she is a very shy reserved child and has befriended the two sisters that are leaving April 2011. So she at the minute is fine. DD2 is the one that concerns me this minute, but once the 2 other girls leave my girls will have each other a girl in recpetion and an older girl in the next class, which to be fair neither of my girls like very much.

We are a 50/50 split about moving them, my husband thinks they will not cope with the change, and DD1 wants to stay. DD2 and I would like to explore other options. I know there are better schools offering more and think i owe it to them to at least look into it.

My husband wants to discuss the problems with the school, but even if they resolve my other issues with the lack of actual learning. I am not sure being in a school with no peers is going to do they much good. but on the other hand I am scared stiff that I move them and it all goes horribly wrong. :-(

It does sound a very small school - tbh if it were me I would at least be looking into other schools.

It is very tiny but the other way of dealing with the social side is doing after school activities. If you are happy with the education (which it doesn't sound as if you are) you could overcome the lack of social opportunity. Why are the other children leaving?

the 2 girls are leaving as their dad's job is being ocated back up north??

They lost quite a few in september to secondary school and another lady removed her 2 for similar reasons to mine.

We have limited funds for outside activities due to us moving and me losing my job whilst on maternity leave with my 3rd daughter. DD1 did swimming lessons but refused to get in the pool 5 weeks on a trot so I didn't sign up for another set of sessions. She is not a dancer, her idea of fun is reading, she enjoys horse riding but that is not really very sociable and the stables are miles away. we really do live in the middle of no where. We are going to try martial arts next, but she really is painfully shy.

DD2 is, to put it mildly 'different' she has been refered to see of she has any diagnosable disorder, but basically has problems being away from me. Which is not helped by the lack of friends to make her want to be at school. She likes routine and will sit through a whole birthday party with her hands over her ears. hence you may understand my slight reluctance to move them.

Thanks for letting me rant, although a wonderful daddy, my husband doesn't really offer much of an opinion and is sick of listening to me. :-)

What are the alternatives for schools? Obviously you need to find out if there is anything with dd2 and whether it is a good idea or not to consider moving her. As for dd1 have you tried Rainbows?

there are bigger schools in the nearest twon 2 have spaces both have loads to offer, but they have roughly 200 kids in. There are also smaller village schools with 60 - 80 kids in..

DD2 is on her 5th out of 6 sessions with PCAMHS and as of yet is to speak 1 word to the lady, she seems to think it is attachment disorder to me. I can see another referal will be needed in a year or so to get to the bottom of it. It takes her time but she does settle down to new things and ideas. so initially would be a nightmare, it'll all be ok in the end, probably, maybe, i hope lol.

Rainbows, that is the younger version of brownies isn't it, what a great idea.... i hadn't even thought of it, and doesn't beavers take girls now too. that may be more suited to her. she'll be my one climbing everest rather than sewing hems lol

kids ay, i thought it would be far more simpler than this.

Yes I was going to suggest Rainbows/Brownies and/or Beavers.

My DD is 8 (yr 4) and loved/loves both (she was a Beaver, now a Cub and was a Rainbow, now a Brownie).

I have to say I would have very very serious doubts about a school with 19 children. That is tiny and my main concern would always be about friendships which clearly is an issue at yr school.

A friend teaches in a school of 42 and there are issues there, with twice as many pupils!

I would certainly look into alternatives if I were you, tho I do feel it's important to support village schools (or they may close, meaning everyone at them has to drive miles to school )

Also for out of school stuff, how about gym class or football?

Lots of football clubs are happy to take girls and they can play in teams with the boys until U10s (ie yr 5).

Thank you. I have a meeting at the school tomorrow afternoon with both teachers. My husband sadly cannot make it, so going it alone. Wish me luck

Rainbows is a great idea.

My dd (5) loves it. And it's just lots of fun with girls the same age.

And different to school. Try and choose one with children from different schools (although, if your school only has 26 children, it sounds like they won't fill up Rainbows)

It must be quite difficult for Ofsted to just EYFS if there only a few children in it.

My mum taught in a school of 45 children and the school did work but she had to work incredibly hard to deliver education to three of four year groups at a time. Perhaps a bigger school?

Rainbows is also cheap. Ours is 15 pounds a term. I think the church where it is hosted subsidises it.

Uniform expensive though.