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Original poster

..."as part of the day it is asked that your child dresses in Victorian clothes" ...

150 replies

Smithagain · 03/12/2009 19:17

... thus reads the request, so casually inserted in an otherwise innocuous letter about a school trip next week.

... oh, and by the way, DD1 also requires white shoes for her play on Tuesday ... and a warm shawl which will look elegant with her fairy godmother costume, without interfering with her wings.

BUT WE DON'T HAVE ANY OF THOSE THINGS!

I thought I was doing so well, having produced a chinese costume from thin air. And the other day DD2's teacher asked if I was OK, because "everyone says you're looking very tired".

I wonder why that might be?

(Ignore me, just a light-hearted, end of term, straw-that-broke-the-camel's-back rant so that I don't take it out on any of the hard-working and dedicated staff that normally have my utmost respect, but are just pushing their luck a teeny, weeny bit with the latest costume requests)

Merry Christmas!

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LtEveDallas · 04/12/2009 10:25

We were told on Monday that children needed to be 'dressed festively' today and that they needed to bring chocolate with them for a 'chocolate box'

Cue me adapting a red dress that DD already owned with some white edging in the week and making choc fairy cakes last night. Luckily I invested in a sewing machine last christmas so it doesn't take too long.

The only thing that annoys me about this (so far, DD is only in reception - it may get worse!) is that I always try to make an effort - and then when DD gets to school hardly anyone else in her class has, and I get some shocking dirty looks.

juliemacc · 04/12/2009 10:30

smithagain - several (hours), lots of sequins and buttons; took me ages and lots of wine but she did look fab

sunnydelight · 04/12/2009 10:32

I lost it once when the teacher in charge of the school play had illusions of grandeur(sending home bound scripts with "Cinderella - written and directed by teacher X" in gold letters on the front ffs!) and told DS1 that if teacher X wanted me to supply anything else she could sodding well supply it herself. The message obviously got through as I got a note the next day from teacher X telling me not to worry about anything, she's sort it. God knows what he said to her

QOD · 04/12/2009 16:20

Well, dd is in 2 pantos this year, one big proper theatre one, in a BIG town, audiences of 700+ and I have to somewhere find a "long sleeved plain black tshirt"
Thats all - but I challenge YOU to find one!
She is also in our village one - audiences of about 100 possible but not likely LOL and they have this wonderful woman who is knocking EVERYTHING UP!

nickelbabe · 04/12/2009 16:28

I understand the complaints, but I love dressing up, so:

get one of mum's dresses and put it on child with a belt tied round the waist and a piece of ratty fabric wrapped round shoulders as a shawl. she can wear boots or school shoes.
don't brush her hair in the morning and rub some dirt on her face.

instead of mum's dress, have DD got a long nightie? put a long sleeved teeshirt and leggings on underneath the nightie, then tie the belt and have the shawl again.

the fabric for shawl can be a blanket or throw that you've bought from a charity shop and cut into a square measuring 1m each side. then fold it into a triangle and wrap.

Addictedtothepc · 04/12/2009 16:30

How about this?

long sleeved t shirt

Fimbo · 04/12/2009 16:35

Ds was an angel when he was in the school nursery. What they advised parents to do for costumes was to use a man's white shirt which is then fastened up the back, the neck can remain open and the child just puts it over their head. Attach tinsel around the bottom and voila.

Addictedtothepc · 04/12/2009 16:40

What kind of dresses do you have? None of mine look anything like a Victorian dress and the only nightie I've been able to find for my dd is a Snow white dress effort from Asda - would love a nice white cotton one. Legging and a tshirt underneath a snow white nightie would never pass for Victorian.
Parents of girls at our school told me they spent £30 on a proper Victorian costume - the boys looked more cobbled together.

nickelbabe · 04/12/2009 16:42

okay.
have you got any blouses with closed collars?
failing that, a man's shirt.

nickelbabe · 04/12/2009 16:43

(if you go for the blouse effect, she'll need one of your skirts too: again, gather at the waist with a belt)

nickelbabe · 04/12/2009 16:44

a plain dress with a round neck is all that's needed.

Original poster
Smithagain · 04/12/2009 22:45

OK - got to be honest now - MIL has come up with the goods and the Victorian costume is coming together. Skirt needs taking in, or it will fall down, but apart from that, we're sorted.

And yes, it's the Ragged Museum and I know they're going to have a fabulous time, although DD is already scared by the reports about the shouty teachers .

And thanks for your comments Petrus ... but this was meant to be a light-hearted letting-off-steam kind of thread, as I think I said. I know this kind of stuff is fun for the children. And I will put a reasonable amount of effort in to make sure both DDs have the right kit.

But I do get stressed by the drip-drip-drip of requests at this time of year. They are coming in thick and fast and it's hard to keep up, or to timetable in the time to deal with them. I am also holding down two jobs - one as a children's worker for my church, so you can imagine that the lead-in to Christmas is not exactly the most relaxing time of year for me and I could have done with more than a few days' notice of the requirement for period costume.

I was also in school today, volunteering with some of the children. Having seen how stressed the staff are by all the end of term festivities, I do feel maybe we could all slacken off a bit and give each other a break!!

Thanks to everyone who has offered constructive suggestions. And my heart is still going out to all the parents of Pearly Queens!

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Original poster
Smithagain · 04/12/2009 22:50

PS - the frustration also stems from the fact that we've known about the school trip for a month, but the request for costume only emerged yesterday and the trip is on Thursday. It's DHs 40th birthday tomorrow and I am working on Sunday.

Teachers please note - a little more advance notice makes ALL the difference. I could have had this costume cracked three weeks ago, when things were quiet, and would not then have been quietly seething while trying to say oh-so-positive and supportive!

OP posts:
SolidGoldpiginablanket · 04/12/2009 22:53

Petrus: Not everyone has a rich hubby and fuck all to do except invent even more self-aggrandizing ways to waste other parents' time. WHy don't you get a job?

Insider333 · 05/12/2009 00:11

Oh dear, PetrusPoo seems very angry...

Just remember, in a hundred years time, we'll all be gone. Boo hoo!

PetrusPoo · 05/12/2009 12:52

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

serenity · 05/12/2009 14:30

Smithagain - when DS1 went there was one crying child. DS2's class were obviously made of sterner stuff as there were no tears although one child who got told off and made to stand at the front looked very mutinous... I've got a couple of years before DD goes, so have loads of time to prepare for her trip

upahill · 05/12/2009 14:45

We got sewing patterns sent home so the parents could make skirts. We got photos of how an Edwardian would look and could we please copy.

Last year we got told the excact shade of green that T shirts had to be! (yeah sure I've got a spare at the back of the feckin' wardrobe if in case the school decides to put a play on.) Easter hats are the worse for me. I am not creative and hate trying to work out how hats are made. My kids don't give a toss about the costumes but if I didn't bother I can just here the comments from my living room of how Mrs Upahill couldn't be arsed!!

Best one was when they sent a letter home on Friday saying could they go dressed as their favourite nursery rhyme character. I was working on a ressi that weekend and DS says I don't realy like Nursery rhyms - They are alright if your in nursery school.

Feckin Homework for parents!!!!

upahill · 05/12/2009 14:51

I agree about the drip drip of requests as well. (Flippin 'eck my cage has been rattled this afternoon!!)
Just had non-uniform day and had to take something in - fair enough just got something from the Christmas food pile. Now they want something for the church mass.
Then the emotional blackmail of 'we need a DONATION of £9.50 for the pantomine otherwise the we are unable to run it' That is not a feckin donation. It should be worded 'The cost of the trip to the Pantomine is £9.50' I wouldn't get so narked then.

ETC ETC ETC.....

Trafficcone · 05/12/2009 14:55

Victorian-school trousers and shirt with waistcoat and flat cap. Done. Charity shop for about £2. It's the flaming togas and egypitan slave outfits I cna't stand!

BendyBob · 05/12/2009 15:01

God, how I dread opening the book bag.

Surely everyone has full access to the BBC costume dept...

My personal hair shirt is 'world book day'. Oh what a pain in the arse fun that is!

Numberfour · 05/12/2009 15:18

upahill, we also received a request that sounded more like a threat for the cost of the panto outing. i would much have preferred an outright request, too.

TheApprentice · 05/12/2009 15:21

I think whoever said its more a middle class phenomenon was spot on. I've always taught in quite deprived areas and the only requests for dressing up have been on world book day. also requests for money are tried to be kept down to a minimum.

Upahill, the reason you are asked for a donation is that schools are not allowed to charge for school trips now, so as not to disadvantage poorer families. Its actually a piece of nonsense because unless most people pay the school can't afford to go, so they ask for a "donation" but it amounts to the same thing.

GetOrfMoiLand · 05/12/2009 15:25

DD used to go to a school which had a Victorian week every year. It was never too much of a chore as it was known about in advance, the ones that used to throw me were the requests to make a crown or whatever with 24 hours notice.

The Victorian week was a mishmash - the girls generally wore customised bridemsaids dresses with shawsl if they had them, and the boys (and some of the girls) went as chimney sweeps. Chimney sweeps easy - an old school shirt ripped up and covered in boot polish, an old pair of trousers ditto, long black socks and boots, a necekerchief (old rag) and a flat cap if you know a kindly old man prepared to lend you one. DD dressed as a chimney sweep every year and had fun.

LOL at Solidgold's post.

Pogleswood · 05/12/2009 15:37

Hmm,GetOrfMyLand - I'm another non creative,non sewing person,and I could do Victorian - BUT -we do not,in our house,have any of those things you've listed - no bridesmaids dresses,no old trousers etc
DS has to dress as an evacuee - we don't have anything suitable for that either. (Except for shorts,and we wouldn't have those if DS grew a a bit faster.)Second hand shops round here don't have a vast choice of knitted jumpers and tank tops,or caps!
So we will cope but I am really wound up by the assumption that people just have this stuff lying around!