We are the festive receptionists' mothers - we bring shepherds, aliens and travelling cribs to a nativity play near you

[mistletoemulledwinemoodlum]

This is our new festive thread ladies.

tree - sounds like endoftermitis, on top of everything else.

It's really hard going at the moment, all the Christmas stuff, play stuff, etc. etc. They've been going since the beginning of December with only a week off and they're all knackered. Believe me, I know, I'm the same and I'm 35 not 4......

How old is treejunior? If she's not five she doesn't HAVE to be there yet, so you could have a couple of days off to do some Mummy / Daughter stuff (is there anyone who could look after demandingbaby for an afternoon to give you some time together?)

Maybe see if you could pick her up at lunchtime?

Does she go to bed early? Maybe an extra hour's sleep would help.

On that note, I'm off to bed myself.

Hang in there, only another week-and-a-bit to go.

Thanks golgi - she was 5 in October, so I guess she does need to be there. I wondered about occasional half days. SHe sleeps 7 till 7 so does ok there, but is still tired. Maybe I could get her to bed for 6.30.

Maybe next term will get better.....

Sleep well.

If she is 5, then there is only so much you can do I think. I have heard that some children take a year or so to really get used to school and accept it. I really thought dd would be like this - but I am much too boring at home! Also, she has had PT childcare since she was a baby which tends to make a difference.

I know it must be heartbreaking to see her sad - I have other issues like this with dd. Be clear that demandingbaby will be going to school too one day - it's not really a choice - unless you can contemplate homeschooling.

I give dd a 'special' kiss in her hand that she keeps at school in case she misses me (got that idea from another mnet thread - ta very much!). She really loved the idea. Could you give her some little token or similar to keep with her during the day?

Yes I can Acinonyx, that is a great plan. We already talk a bit about thinking of each other and sending kisses.

I'll do that tomorrow, assuming she is well enough for school. I'll have to battle to hold back the tears for that one I think!!

Oh tree, how miserable. The Christmas holiday will help I'm sure. I know just what you mean about her looking fine in a herd of 30 - that's exactly what a worry about with my dd1.

Do you get to do anything just you and her together? Might that help a bit?

How long has she been wobbly for? Do you think part of it could have been her coming down with the sick bug?

Something I have found in our case which may strike you as odd - after I had said a few times that I missed dd (thinking this was being empathetic) she said she was very worried about me that I was sad and missed her when she was at school. So I reassured her that I was very busy during the day with my work and chores and absolutely fine. Since then I have been very carefuly about that kind of remark.

I think it can be easy to slip into a semi-tragic Romeo-Juliet style parted lovers wistfulness which becomes a self-fulfilling prophecy. I can see that in our case, dd needs to feel that I love her but I'm entirely self-sufficient and happy when she's not there. No idea if that's relevant - just thought I'd throw out in there.

Hi all

Tree - poor you. Poor little tree. I don't know what to suggest other than perhaps taking quiet half days if you can, and really not worrying about any homework or extra things that they can all get bogged down with. Just do the bare minimum. It really isn't long until the end of term, and if the problem continues into next term, then I would start to be concerned - but atm I would just hopefully put it down to endoftermitis, as golgi said. And tbh, once you've got over the nativity, its really no big deal if you miss days coming up to the end of term, so you could give her a break and hope it passes over the holidays.

I forsee trouble ahead. DS came with me to pick up DD today, and he just mournfully shakes his head and says how much he wishes he was still at dd's school. His holidays are about ten days longer than hers, during which time he will have to come with me to pick up and drop off, so by the time he gets to go back, he'll be in a frenzy about not going back to his school..

Dear god it just doesn't get any easier. Nativity went well though.

Aci's point is a good one - a friend of mine's son was inconsolable every day on the way to school and in school, and then one day, he got home, burst into tears and said, "I'm so sorry Mummy, I didn't think about you all day, and now I'm really worried about you". The inference being that he had been worried about her missing him, worried that he should be thinking of her all the time, and then worried that, when he hadn't thought of her, this was a bad thing. Lots of worry for a little head. But once they cleared that up, he was much happier.

But I do know what you mean about them just being sad, I do feel that about ds a little bit, and theoretically he could miss the whole of the year because he's not 5 til June...

Sorry, I'll stop posting now and go to bed!!

Right - will take all advice on board. I always say I am just doing house work adn going to Debenhams [both our living definition of hell].

I think I need to give it about 3 weeks into new term, then see.

Will hold nerve for now....

Glad nativity was a success moodlum!

Glad nativity was good moodlum. How was yours golgi? Tree, awww I can understand you must be worrying, my DD's so ready for the christmas holidays now - but not upset to the extent of little tree. My DD's counting off to the last day of school on her advent calendar - not long now.
I think seeing how she is a few weeks into new term is just about all you can do.
The other thing is, school does seem to be particularly 'full on' at the moment with all the christmas stuff. It's all so much for them.
Acrinonyx, I love the kiss in the hand idea.

I seem to be in the school quite a bit. Helped in the class this morning - really enjoyed it today actually....I know what I'm doing more now.
And helping at christmas disco at the end of the week - tbh I volunteered as I don't much fancy just dropping her off for it.

well we got the nativity out of the way - phew! dc was good up until he was called up; after that he lost interest all together though still stayed with the class, just facing the wrong way. would be ok if it were not for the dozen camacorders recording every minute of it

Congratulations tispity!

DD still isn't right - although not sick. Just wiped out. Everything crossed she makes it in the morning. I am ready for the tears, they have already started. It's the nativity, I can't let her miss it unless she has has has too surely? She is knackered, but for one day only maybe she can just do it then crawl home.
She has a gymanstics Christmas display [her one activity that she is dropping after this term] but I think that might have to go

ds had a bad night too and i did consider keeping him off but it would be too cruel - they had been preparing for it for weeks, he knew all the songs

Hello all.

Nativity went well - couldn't see much really as it was in church rather than on stage, but the second shepherd from the left looked very fetching in his teatowel and seemed to be joining in well with the songs.

Oh Lord. It's the morning soon.

Have lavender oil and sweet orange, ready to burn. Try to calm her, bless. Also have flower remedy to pop in her juice.

Oooooooh wish me luck people. I almost feel like just staying up, so that I am awake and breezy when I have to get her up and get ready for school Could have dd2 totally sorted that way too. I'd probably be brighter doing that, than I will be at 7am. SHift worker maddness

At least it is the nativity, and her nanas will be there. So I have lots to encourage her. Friday might be another story

I am an excellent actress, so I know I can shield my specific anxiety. I gues she will pick up something, but no more unusual than the normal morning gotta-be-on-time stuff.

Might down load jingle bells etc to get her in the Christmas grove.

Wish us luck.

good luck christmas tree. Will be thinking of you

Thanks.

Wibble.

I wasn't this nervous on the first days!!

How'd it go?

Aww tree-I really feel for you. DS is still doing a good deal of bouncing around both before and after school and seems really happy but then I look at him sometimes and he seems so so sad. Its like he's got the weight of the world on his shoulders and I want him to go back to my happy carefree boy I had before september.

He said to me yesterday:"I do like school mummy but I really wish I had people to play with all the time because sometimes at lunchtime I just walk around on my own and its really lonely". Had to really stop myself crying and just gave him a massive hug and we had a long chat. Basically his best friend at school also plays with some other little boys (as they would) and DS for all his bravodo is actually incredibly shy and won't go and play with them as well. We had loads of stuff said at parents evening about he'll only play with certain children and doesn't want to play with the others...he is actually scared of a lot of them and doesn't want to play the games they play ie Ben 10,Power Rangers etc cause he doesn't like it. He'll happily play with girls,his friends and some of the quieter boys but seems to be on his own a lot which is making me feel quite sad.

Anyway only a week left thank goodness and then 2 weeks off-yay! Its nativity next tuesday so will get to see him as Joseph (although apparently he wants to name the baby something different to jesus so could be interesting!) and then they've got christmas lunch and a christmas party to look forward to.

All the children go full time after christmas so hopefully he'll make friends with some of the younger ones who have only been there until lunch now.

She did it. Did the nativity, and a gym display, and then came home and collapsed. Ate 4 chips only.

I feel really terrible about the whole thing. My mum says I have looked down and miserable all day, dd said I looked tired. I tried really hard to be lovely and help dd through the day. I have worried sick about her though, and other stuff going on, but thought we had done really quiet well, and seems actually I am shit.

Makes me though. One day I am not La La La Cbeebies entertainer, just trying to be calm and keep dd quiet and calm too, and I get jumped on.

Bad day overall, although the play and display were smashing.

Tree - no need for you to feel bad. Not your fault at all, and you are doing your best to keep everybody going.

Can I recommend a day off tomorrow?

You can, if only so I can sort out my quite from my quiet!!

Am having a night away with dh, in a hotel and hour away. First time since....2007!! So that is good. But will only see dd in the am, so wracked with guilt as have been so today..

Off to bed, to sleep off developing mental health issues

Aww poor you tree. Sounds like actually you have been a great mother, so I would ignore your dm and focus on what a good job you have done. Have a nice time with your dh - little tree will be fine, and you can all come back and enjoy a well deserved weekend together.

Finally found you all again - lost the new thread sorry .

Ds is totally zonked this week after a cold and I want my normal ds back. He has cried at dropping off although seems to have still been happy once in.

I hope this doesn't continue next week as it's exhausting.

Hoping he has a lie in tomorrow and Sunday to get more normal.

He's either bouncing off the walls (so not him as he's not that type of boy) or tired and emotional.

We were going to go away for the first weekend of the hols and I'm so very glad we didn't as he needs the chilling out at home time.

Nativity next week. Hope he isn't over tired and the one who doesn't do what he's meant to - there is always one isn't there. I remember forgetting my lines in the nativity play when I was 5 and being absolutely mortified. And I'd left my teddy at school (for some reason they were in the nativity too). I was hysterically upset.

Hello grammerpolice!

tree - I hope you have a lovely night away and manage to leave the guilt behind. It sounds as though your mother is being completely insensitive - it's amazing how they have a way of touching one's rawest nerves. I keep pondering this fact and hoping I won't do the same to my dds.

dd1 managed her Christmas show with aplomb and was very sweetly overexcited about the whole thing. She looked so grown up in her costume that dh didn't recognise her when she came on stage and had to be sharply elbowed!

And we have just been to a birthday party which wasn't a complete disaster! So I'm feeling quite positive about things at the moment.