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Is changing school the answer?

7 replies

mydoorisalwaysopen · 08/11/2009 21:11

DS1 started year 1 in September - he loved reception and couldn't wait to get to school each day. He even complained that the summer holidays were too long. Now he sobs and cries every day about going to school. He says he hates the school, the teacher and the teaching assistant. He finds the work difficult and the regime of sitting quietly all day with a very strict and humourless teacher is a torture to him. I have spoken to the teacher about this and she was very hostile and said to let him settle in. In the last week before the half term I felt he'd had enough time to settle in so requested a meeting with the teacher. She very reluctantly gave me 5 minutes when she told me he was a very disruptive and naughty boy (two weeks earlier at parents' evening she'd had no concerns whatsoever). I told her this was clearly a result of being so unhappy because he has never been a naughty boy before at school or nursery. He is so unhappy and the teacher is so hostile I am considering sending him to another school. Is this a knee-jerk hasty reaction? I'm so worried it'll do more harm than good and feel at a loss as to how to help him.

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Are your children’s vaccines up to date?
deaddei · 08/11/2009 21:15

She sounds like a real charmer!
Are any other boys experiencing this? Maybe chat to other mums/
I would take this to head of ks1.

Clayhead · 08/11/2009 21:18

I think the transition to year one can be HUGE (sometimes bigger than between pre-school and reception).

My ds has also struggled a bit - he spent loads of his Reception year outside due to the free flow play, part of the EYFS - he is having to adjust to staying inside. There is also more formal learning.

Luckily, his teacher has been fab, letting some of them go out for some of the day during this term in order to help their transition.

I would not be happy in your situation that the teacher does not seem to be taking your concerns seriously.

mydoorisalwaysopen · 08/11/2009 21:22

Several of the children are very unhappy - having to be peeled off mums when they had been perfectly happy before. Most are complaining to their parents of being bored. One mum is definitely moving her daughter to another school. There are 21 boys in the class and only 9 girls so boys are overrepresented and the teacher has a reputation for not liking boys . She is one of those that you wonder why she ever got into teaching. She's retiring at the end of this academic year.

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Mallenstreak · 09/11/2009 18:49

I would give it a bit longer to see if he settles a bit better however I really sympathise with you. We were told our son was also very disruptive and naughty even though the nursery had thought he was great and really bright. The school did nothing to stretch him but due to his excellent vocabulary he thought all the children were 'babies' as he couldn't understand what they were saying to him. He ended up being segregated from his peers in another playground as the school said he had social problems - no wonder! We dithered about removing him from the school and really wish we had. He ended up on School action+ and they tried to get him statemented. He has been at junior school for 2 years now where all the staff are wonderful and think he's brilliant.The head said she has seen none of the problems she was told about by the other school so we now know who had the problem - the head from this 'Outstanding'school.

Mallenstreak · 09/11/2009 18:51

I would be concerned that they are saying that he is disruptive already as it seems that they have made their mind up about him without giving him a chance!

mydoorisalwaysopen · 11/11/2009 14:43

Thank you for your messages. This week has been a little better - he is not so terribly upset at the thought of going to school. The whole thing - and particularly the way the school has responded has made us have a rethink - the primary is not brilliant anyway and the secondary we are in catchment for is in special measures so we're wondering whether a major change is called for while the kids are young enough to settle in and not really know any different.

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MollieO · 11/11/2009 14:58

I would arrange a meeting with the teacher and head of year to see if you can find a way forward.

Ds loved reception but so far year 1 has been an utter nightmare and is not improving. I've alredy been told twice by his teacher that she has never had a pupil like him. I'm currently contemplating what I will say at parents' evening next week.

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