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Classmate being told not to play with DD

7 replies

starrychime · 03/11/2009 22:10

Hello.
My first ever post - joined tonight. Been reading lots of helpful posts and hope someone can advise on this.
My DD in P2 told me that someone in her class (a boy) told her he couldn't play with her as his mum told him not too. DD a bit upset (though not as much as me!) as her other friends play with him and when they do she can't play with them. His mum seems really nice and I speak to her in the mornings sometimes and wasn't aware of a problem. Should I bring this up with her and find out what's going on. DD isn't an angel by any means but she doesn't know why he's been told this and she's usually pretty honest. Should I just leave it or bring it up and try to get to the bottom of it?

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cece · 03/11/2009 22:12

Don't speak to the mum. If this is causing problems in school then talk to the teacher and let him/her sort it out.

starrychime · 03/11/2009 22:26

I don't thing it's causing a huge problem for DD but my paranoia is growing by the hour! I thought of maybe saying in a friendly way "Has (DD) done something awful to xxx - she mentioned he said he wasn't to play with her".

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whippet · 03/11/2009 22:29

I bet the Mum would be as surprised as you. I bet the boy is just making it up!

Some of DS2's 'friends' often say 'I can't play with you because X,Y,Z' to each other all the time.

Vivid imaginations, and still developing social skills

MyCatIsABiggerBastardThanYours · 03/11/2009 22:33

Maybe they had a little spat and the boy told his mum who said, in innocence, something like 'well don't play with her then'. THat is very different to being told he can't play with her but something that could cause confusion for young children.

lilolilmanchester · 03/11/2009 22:35

came to write what MyCat said.

Helloall · 03/11/2009 22:51

Don't bring it up with the other mum. Kids fall in and out. Maybe the kids is having trouble standing up to himself, like the previous poster said. I don;t think your daughter is lying but maybe there is a mis-understanding between the children. Maybe your daughter wanted to play a game he is not allowed to play? Who knows? But unless it is causing your daughter worry - let it go. If my son said this I wouldn't want to make a big deal out of it.

If you are worried that there is something deeper speak to the school? Just ask them generally about your kids behaviour. If everything is fine then please don't worry.

starrychime · 03/11/2009 23:07

Thanks for these replies so far - now beginning to get it into perspective a bit. Only thing a bit upsetting for DD is if her friends are playing with him then she can't be with them. He is a lovely boy as far as I can tell so I'm pretty sure it's not nasty behaviour. It all seemed so much easier last year when they were just out of nursery

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