DS hating school because it's all play and no work.

[Spidermama]

He just started in reception and is already deeply disillusioned. He's been desperate to learn more writing skills. He already knows quite a few letters and has been writing phonetically for over a year.

His brothers and sister do pretend school with him and have taught him a fair bit.

I know there are plenty of kids, especially boys, who really don't want to do much writing at this age (4.5) and I understand that reception is designed to be about socialising through play and singing etc ... but he's hating it!!

Is there anything I can do? Could the teacher, for example, give him work sheets to help him with his writing even though he's possibly the only one who wants to do it at this stage?

I don't want him to feel held up and disillusioned already.

Thanks. Good suggestions.

I think that you are beinga mean about the worksheet thing, maybe not all 4 yr old boys want worksheets but one with 3 older siblings is def going to have seen them and poss want to do some as he sees it as 'big kid' stuff

Thanks LDucks. Yes I smarted a little from my worksheet dressing down.

My ds didn't really like reception because the activities were quite young for him ~making a circle or triangle out of playdoh for a morning did not grab him at all.

He had loved structured play at his previously excellent nursery where they had all sorts of fun playstations for eg space,cafe,shop,garage etc,and it was a step down interest wise.

He loved the outdoor play area but found a lot of the children were not as communicative as he was [most were younger and he was an early talker]and the activities were very dull compared to what he had been doing or would be doing at home.

He loved it as he went up through the school with more challenges so probably is happiest now in yr 3 where it is more grown up.

He is also the youngest and was used to a fair bit of attention and he did find it very young and dull[he is old in the year].

Not sure what the answer is it's just a bit unfortunate if the reception teacher isn't very on the ball or innovative.

It is impossible to say "my child is bored in your class",and if the teacher hasn't got it,she hasn't got it really.

And all his other classes have been great and he does very well. It simply was very young for what he was like at the time.

Yes my DS is a big talker too. Like his dad!

It seemed a tough lesson to learn at the time ~ so I get his disappointment.

But I do think as they get to know him better they will realise what he is like and give him some writing to do if he is keen.

I remember wondering if he had too much attention,was too forward etc ~ but no he's fine,very capable and popular.And still quite academic,loves to do the work.

ds apparantly loves school and has some good mates. Despite me worrying about this with his very high expectations prior to starting. But he had his first reading book home yesterday and i suggested we read it. He treated it with complete contempt. It took him around 3 mins to read cover to cover and only needed help with one word. he could do the rest fluently. I know he can read well - he's finished the library reading challenge for 2 years running but doesnt like anyone else -even his dad to know he can read.

In order to get ds more ready for school and his probable dissappointment i had to do a lot of work saying that the first few weeks is about learning about the school day and the order that things work, about making friends, about the teachers finding out about what they can already do, and about finding out where everything is in school. He thinks that the amount of proper work will increase after 4 weeks. It will be interesting to see what happens if it doesnt live up yo his expectations after this time

Oh the point of what i was saying was that:

1. i have had to explain to ds exactly how reception is in that it appears to focus on playing but they are secretly making you learn
2. It takes time for everyone to learn about the routines and how school works. Some people have big brothers and sisters so already know
3. The teachers have to use the first 3 weeks to learn who the children are, what they like and what they can do
4. The learning will start but probably not before half term

I will worry about ds after the first half term if he still is worried about not learning enough.

Suggest that if you can adapt some of above for now, suggest more role play with older siblings and give the teacher time to settle the class in. She will be assessing them and sorting out what they can and cant do already but it takes time to do the whole class and sort out learning peer groups. Ds was benchmarked (tested) on the mon of the second week and we only know that because the kids were kept in school for the afternoon of the testing (nb this done through games and play and gentle perswasion so sutle) Not relevant as ds was booked into the optional creche fascilities for afternoons so was there anyway. But some kids had to stay for an afternoon they wouldnt have done

oh heck.

Things seem really slow to start off with to allow adaptation to school and to allow teacher to get work targetted right. but being a mum with older kids and having been through this before i will appologise for insulting you intelligence and skuttle of to bed before you want to smack me with the collective book bags.