Relutance to learn in Yr1

[MollieO]

I'm loathe to start another 'my child is struggling' thread but I don't want to hijack other threads and I really could do with some advice.

Ds started in Yr1 last week. He has been looking forward to going back to school so I didn't envisage any particular problems.

Homework started this week, would take 5 mins to do. He refuses to do it. I have tried everything but to no avail. I found out today that he isn't engaging in class either. He bit another child today (have never had behavourial issues at school before) and was sent to see a senior teacher (head in meeting or else it would have been the head). Apparently he came back and did more than double the work in his maths class than he has managed all the other days combined.

He is the sort of child that always asks detailed questions about everything and is usually very sociable and confident and keen to please. The child I currently seem to be parenting bears no relation to this.

I have tried everything I can to try and engage him, even reverse psychology - 'it doesn't matter if you don't bother to do your homework as someone has to come bottom and it may as well be you' (he is very competitive so that was my last shot).

What can I do to get him to engage in his learning? His teacher is strict but very nice but has yet to see what he can do. I know she was surprised at how much work he did after his talking to but it shouldn't take a visit to the head to get his arse in gear everytime.

I know it is early in the school year but I have a sense of seeing the year slip by with ds not finding that spark to learn and then the problems will just multiply.

regards homework, all most teachers want is to know there is some input happening so you could write a little message on the back of the homework , if for instance its a numeracy worksheet - adding and taking, saying " X found it quite hard to complete the sums on the sheet but we used pasta pieces/lego etc and did the same activity practically." rather than refusing (not saying that you would) or forcing your child to do a written worksheet they really don't want to do.

would "mummy and daddy are not teachers and we have three kids under 6 at home plus we are on opposite shifts so we have not done the homework tonight" suffice does anyone think?

I object to the idea of homework at this age. To me homework is to check the childs understanding of the subject something that they should be able to independently if not it is either too hard or they are too young.

to do that is

Surely it depends on the school too. By the sounds of it our school doesn't give them anywhere near as much pressure as your school MollieO. DS is objecting to not being outside as much and to having to sit for longer periods than in reception, but he doesn't get anywhere near as much homework, and they're learning through building, making, thinking and creating rather than more traditional approaches mostly. The children seem pretty happy mostly and the parents very happy accordingly. So maybe if it continues you should talk to the teacher MollioO? Your son can't be the first/ only one to find the change so major and how useless are the school if they're not concerned by his behaviour change or the fear that the change is putting him off? I'd worry if they don't have a view on it personally.

I have heard the phrase 'I hate school' for the first time from my little angel and he has just started year 1. Big Sis aged 8 promptly replied 'everyone hates school, you just have to get on with it and stop complaining or you'll end up not even enjoying the fun bits'.

I was glad she handled it as I wasn't sure what to say .

He got 5/7 in his spellings and was a bit miffed (there were tears) so he has decided that maybe he should learn them after all.

Have you tried doing the homework in the morning rather than the evening? It is a bit of a pain but I find my 5yo is just too tired for homework in the evening but he is OK at breakfast.

I don't think there is any pressure put on them and his teacher has said to not try and force him to do his homework. I know he will get all his spellings right as they only have to spell them out rather than write them. I know he can write them too, he just won't. Same with the reading.

I am going to have a relaxed weekend and hope that next week is better. His grandma is in hospital for a routine op from today for about a week and as we are most likely her only visitors homework will have to take a back seat.

melli I have got ds to do his reading homework (perfectly) on the way to school but his teacher has vetoed that (she said that I can't pay proper attention and drive!). We don't really have time as I would prefer to leave him to sleep than wake him earlier to do homework.