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I just need to let of steam

15 replies

saaa · 10/09/2009 19:34

I just need to let off steam. My ds has just started back at school, yr 2. When he was in nursery we were told he was a clever boy, we didn't ask, that was just what the teacher said. We met that same teacher 2 yrs later and she asked him 'are you still a clever boy?'. He has always worked hard at school, he is very serious ( but quite lazy really). In reception we were again told he was a bright boy. Again in yr one'He is a very bright boy', his headteacher said 'well he is a bright boy' when I was discussing him with her. But now 1 week into yr 2 and it's changed.The brighter kids get 15 spellings , my ds has got 10. I presume the new teacher has a report of somesort from the yr 1 teacher. I don't want him pushed if it would be detrimental. But what happened. Over the day I could feel my acceptance of 'ok so he isn't as bright after all' move to annoyance at all those previous comments. And I don't want to be annoyed with my ds or infact his new teacher because it is early days.I can see that he doesn't pick up new concepts in, say, maths quite as quickly as a particular friend. But what, do I have to completely rearrange my ideas. Whoa,now I know I am sounding cross , and yes perhaps this is my pride hurt here. But why the change of attitude?

OP posts:
piscesmoon · 10/09/2009 19:51

The fact that he is lazy probably says it all-he may be basically bright but he has to apply himself as well. A new class is always a case of adjustment. I wouldn't worry. If he constantly gets his 10 spellings right and can use them in his written work he will be moved up. If he can't he is in theright group. The same with maths. He is still the same DC-you can be just as proud of his achievements! There is no need to 'be annoyed' with anyone-support your DS and see how it goes.

PortBlacksandResident · 10/09/2009 19:56

I would think they are trying them all out at the moment and DS will settle into his place as the weeks go by.

I agree you walk in and think 'did you read his report?' when you see what tables they are initially placed on etc. I've mostly found that by half term they are where they should be.

caveat - i thought DS1 was in a place and with work too advanced for him so i'm not being a snob here.

saaa · 10/09/2009 19:59

Thank you, on the whole i havn't pushed him as I see no purpose in that. But this shook me and made me wonder if I should.Thankyou for your response, I felt a laugh of relief come from me.

OP posts:
PortBlacksandResident · 10/09/2009 20:07

Obviously if you feel it's not right for him in a few weeks then it is definitely worth a mention - if you don't fight his corner who will.

saaa · 10/09/2009 20:17

Thanks it does help to 'air your feelings'. damaged pride and wanting what is right for your child as you say. I discussed it with my dh and he just said ' well if that's what they think...' which probably equally sparked of my annoyance. As you say if we don't fight their corner who will. Yes we have a parents meeting in a few weeks, wait and see.

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Goblinchild · 10/09/2009 20:37

Bright but lazy!
He needs the work he's producing in class to reflect his ability, so make sure he learns his spellings, gets consistently good marks and then ask for 15 at the parents' meeting.
Or you could nab the teacher for a few minutes and ask her how you can support him at home.
Bright but lazy is a label that fits my teenager well, but that's about to change big time!

saaa · 10/09/2009 22:13

Goblinchild that sounds interesting. Good luck.

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katiestar · 10/09/2009 23:24

Hmm I don;t think the ability to learn spellings necessarily equates to ability in other fields.

LadyMuck · 10/09/2009 23:31

I think that "bright" boys usually excel at numeracy, they pick up concepts very quickly and are very articulate.

That doesn't equate with good written work.

I think that ds2 (also Yr 2) has just dropped a table at school as his handwriting is frankly awful - reception age even. But he understands an awful lot and his numeracy is very good. He is now helping the children on his table with the work they're given.

By the end of year 2 I suspect that he will have mastered writing and recording. He'll never have the presentation skills of the girls, but he'll be fine. And because his writing will be sufficient, then he'll be back to where he should be in terms of table arrangements etc.

And frankly, given the level of catching up that happens during Year 2, combined with the uselessness of learning spellings formally by lists, I would be grateful that he only has 10 to learn!

souvenir · 10/09/2009 23:38

Message withdrawn

LadyGlencoraPalliser · 10/09/2009 23:55

It's so early in the year yet as well. If by half-term you think the work he is being given is below the level of his abilities that's a good time to go in and have a chat with his teacher. They'll have had time to get to know him by then and you can have a serious chat about how you can support his learning.

cory · 11/09/2009 09:15

what souvenir said

some of the children in dd's class were just very early developers, so they seemed exceptionally bright in reception, but just average by Yr 2

otoh there were other children whose early work gave no hint of how high they would be getting by the end of juniors

so I would stop looking at the other children and ignore your ds's grouping: just look at him and the work he is doing? is it the right level for him? too easy? too hard? and take it from there. the only thing that matters at this stage is that he is working at a level that is right for him.

fircone · 11/09/2009 10:02

what others said

And how old is your ds? In Reception the children born early in the school year often seem like geniuses. They habitually hog the top table and outshine all the others. But as with the start of a marathon, the pack starts to thin out and by Year 2 there are some different and surprising front runners, and they're not all the big ones.

buy1get1free · 11/09/2009 10:36

Saaa I've learnt that when a teacher says 'bright', they don't necessarily mean academically. Don't fret - I'm sure they are giving him work that they feel is challenging him. And if not, they will pick up on it and adjust as necessary. I think your own pride has been a bit bruised .... we mums are all the same

katiestar · 11/09/2009 12:14

Yes 'brigh't just meansd cheerful ,switched on rather than intelligent.Why don't you pin her down and ask her how his performance compares to the rest of the class if you want to know.

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