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Primary education

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Original poster

Shouty teacher distressing DD

20 replies

FlyMeToDunoon · 07/05/2009 13:56

My eldest is in a small group for extra maths support. She has told me in the past and I have heard it from other children in the group and other parents that the teacher shouts a lot.
Yesterday my daughter came home from school and burst into tears. The maths teacher had shouted at her for not concentrating and for leaving her maths folder on the ground.
DD's rucksack has a broken zip and she says her folder fell out unnoticed to her.
She was not able to explain this as the shouting would not allow her. She also said, which I found quite funny, that she couldn't concentrate because the teacher was shouting at someone.
Anyway I feel I may need to say something to the teacher but don't know quite what.
"Please don't shout quite so much please" sounds a bit daft.
Advice anyone.

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edam · 07/05/2009 13:58

Oh dear. Suppose you could take teacher aside and explain that dd came home and burst into tears, and is having problems concentrating as the teacher's voice seems to raised quite often?

Paolosgirl · 07/05/2009 13:59

Have you spoken to the Head at all? It might also help if you could get your dd to write down some examples of when her teacher shouted, what led up to it, how it made her feel etc, and show that to the Head.

What on earth does this teacher hope to achieve by shouting? This is supposed to be a support teacher fgs - on your behalf

smee · 07/05/2009 14:02

Well you could gently say that you're all for discipline, but that your daughter's scared of her and you're worried that in itself will make her work slow down. After all she's supposed to be supporting them not terrifying them. If she's any sort of decent teacher she should know that shouting's a useless way to teach and encourage. And if it's a small group, why on earth does she need to shout at all?!

smee · 07/05/2009 14:02

I wouldn't go to head until after you've spoken to teacher, but I would if it keeps happening after that.

Original poster

FlyMeToDunoon · 07/05/2009 14:07

Smee thats what annoys me-she is a support teacher, meant to be building confidence.

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smee · 07/05/2009 14:14

Go shout at her, see how she likes it - only joking...

Paolosgirl · 07/05/2009 14:18

It's tempting though, isn't it Smee! My DD was shouted at once by the dinner lady for dropping her lunch money . I complained to the school, as we'd only just got her to start having school lunches, but what I really wanted to do was to go and SHOUT at the woman! I'd have been told to stop shouting, that I wouldn't be listened to unless I stopped shouting, and if I didn't stop shouting I'd be removed from the school, wouldn't I?!

Original poster

FlyMeToDunoon · 07/05/2009 14:20

Wondering if its better to approach her main teacher and ask him to have a quiet word?

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stripeypineapple · 07/05/2009 14:28

We had the same problem with my DD's yr1 teacher, she was a shouter too.

I was lucky in that there were two teachers who split the week so I approached the other and voiced my concerns. However, before I did I had spoken to other parents to see how their kids felt about this teacher to see if my DD was just being a bit wet or had maybe taken a dislike to this woman but it turned out that almost all of them didn't like her too.

I don't know if anything was said to her but DD didn't complain so much about her and was encouraged by the fact that I'd taken an active approach and had gone in and seen someone.

I'd canvas the other parents first if I were you and see what their DCs reckon to the teacher and then maybe even a couple of you parent could go in and see the head or the teacher. Safety in numbers

Original poster

FlyMeToDunoon · 07/05/2009 14:46

Right, will drop in on main teacher today and voice my concerns.

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Original poster

FlyMeToDunoon · 07/05/2009 16:35

Spoke to main class teacher who expressed concern but also questioned wether 'shouting' was more 'come on you lot' type calling to action.
Said he would mention to the support teacher but that I should really have a word with her myself.
Hope I have done enough as it is.

OP posts:

smee · 08/05/2009 10:40

Good to hear he listened. How's your daughter though? Is she still worried about it? If so, then I'd talk to the support teacher too.

Paolosgirl · 08/05/2009 14:20

Good for you - and glad he listened. I'd still ask your daughter to try and document examples, so that when/if you do speak to the teacher involved you can spell out exactly what your understanding of the situation was. I'd also point out that maths is not your dd's strong point, and that she learns better through encouragement rather than shouting. Good luck

Original poster

FlyMeToDunoon · 08/05/2009 14:35

Thanks

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neversaydie · 08/05/2009 19:20

DS's teacher shouted at him. Often, and it was distressing him a lot.

Eventually, I went to see the head and pointed out that his concentration is hardly improved if he is either wondering when she is going to shout, or distressed because he has just been aurally assaulted. She stopped.

She is still a lousy teacher, but there is only another half term to go. It has not been a good year.

birty · 08/05/2009 22:07

Today I picked my son up from school and he flooded into tears!! (he is 6) It took me a while to get it out of him what the matter was. He just wanted to go home and I told him I wasnt leaving school until I knew what was going on and if he didnt tell me I would ask the headmaster. As soon as I mentioned the headmaster he cried and wanted to go home even more!! My son told me that he was hiding from his class teacher and she sent him to the headmasters office. The headmaster then shouted very loudly at him in front of a parent, teacher and other children walking by. He was frightened. I told the headmaster he was upset and he said so he should be he needs to learn how to behave! I was quite upset by that remark and told him I do not want my son to be screamed at and that I was happy for him to be punished but not shouting at him as he was in bits. I explained how intimidating it is for a bigger person shouting at a smaller person is not good and he replied dont tell me how to run my school. I was so cross that my partner went down to speak to the headmaster. My partner too could see how upset our son was. What does anyone think? Should I take further action?

Louie1 · 09/05/2009 22:06

Sometimes, a teacher will use a short sharp shout to stop the class, re-assert instant order and move the whole class on. Teachers do not have many disciplinary powers open to them and the short sharp occasional raise of the voice is the only one left. None of us like to think that our children are on the receiving end of such a strategy. However, it could be that said teacher has had a week of picking up books, homework, resources etc that children have had, used and dropped where they land. It could be that the teacher is trying to make a point to all the children that their work at school matters, that it is up to them to bring their books into school, look after their own equipment etc. You wouldn't believe how often children say, when asked for their reading book or whatever, "My Mummy forgot it, My Mummy didn't give it to me, My Mummy left it in the car." It could be that the T in question could have had his/her fill of this and been making the point, no, it's up to you to value your things, don't blame Mum, don't blame the bag zipper, it's up to you.
If it were me, I would have a quiet word with said T, say how much my child had taken to heart what they'd said, how you support their motives to make children more independent, but also ask the T to note how distressed they'd been. I would also have a talk with my child about how important it is to be organised and keep books safe in bags etc.
If children sense that there is disagreement between home and the teacher, then older children have been known to use this to their advantage.
So, I would have a word about the upset caused, but on the face of it try and support what the teacher is doing - if what I've suggested is what the teacher was trying to do.

sleepymommy · 09/05/2009 22:19

I'm a bit of a 'shouty teacher'. Not at individuals, aggressively, but I'll often raise my voice to get a noisy class to pay attention, or restore order at the end of a busy bit!
I was told that one of my pupils is particularly sensitive to shouting, even if it isn't at him, so now I try to use other strategies with that class, or I stand at the other end of the room before bellowing for quiet!

Anyway, the point I'm making is, if the techer is worth his salt he'll accept the fact that he's upset her and he won't do it again. I'd definitely say talk to him.

cory · 10/05/2009 09:19

Ds was terrified of his first male teacher in Yr 3, because he was always shouting. And I had to admit I wasn't impressed by this. Until I had to go in and see the teacher about something different and realised that he was quite simply very hard of hearing. Once ds had had it explained to him that there was a simple explanation and that his teacher wasn't cross all the time, he relaxed and became very fond of him: he burst into tears when the teacher announced at Christmas that he was retiring.

smee · 10/05/2009 20:11

birty, why was your son hiding from his class teacher? Is he scared of her/him too? I'm really asking what started it all, ie was the class teacher out of order to send him to the Head? Or did they do that because your son's pushed them to that state? I'd never condone shouting at a child, and it's awful that your son was so scared, but you kind of need to know what started it too iyswim. That Head Teacher sounds awful either way though What sort of school is it? Sounds horribly old fashioned.

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