Am I being PFB about this?!

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My ds is in Reception. Since the beginning of April the children have been making their own way into school via the main door when the bell rings. Prior to this, the Reception parents walked the dc around to the front of the school building when the bell rang, and waited for the class teacher to come to meet them at the gate into the Reception playground.

My ds has been happy to make his own way in and usually (although not always) the class teacher or TA has come to the main door to usher them all in. We have already had one instance of a little boy running back out to find his mum when she thought he was already in the school, so she made her way back to the car, only to discover her son waiting in tears at the gate for her.

This morning it was pouring down and the older children had made their way straight into school rather than waiting for the bell to ring in the playground. Before this new arrangement came into play, we (parents) would walk the dc around to the front of the building and hand them over to the teacher in the classroom.

Today, no-one was on the main door so I said to my ds 'shall I come with you?' to make sure that there was someone in the classroom. He said yes and I walked him in (past the big sign on the door that says that parents are not permitted to enter the school!) and took him to find his teacher. The teacher didn't seem to have realised that it was raining and was busy in the classroom. He looked quite taken aback that we had made our way in (that I had taken ds?) and because my ds thought we had done the wrong thing he then cried. I left them to it and am sure my ds will be fine but I now feel that I did the wrong thing and am wrestling with it...

I do not feel happy about the policy that the school seem to have of letting the youngest children make their own way in without any adult supervision. I would never expect to send my child into a building on his own and just hope that he managed to make his way to his destination unaccompanied, but it seems this is expected at school. The teacher did say that he would make his way to the door to meet the class after I left but appeared to be an afterthought on his part.

I am cross that I have come home feeling rubbish about leaving my ds in tears, and that it was fairly obvious that I wasn't expected to escort him to an adult but was supposed to leave him to it. The school definitely discourage parents from coming into school with children as, apparently, it has been considered very disruptive in the past. I do understand this, but I also do not think that it is acceptable to expect 4 and 5 year olds to be left in this way. Am I being precious and unreasonable?!

Are you being a bit PFB about it?

Yes, but so is the whole of society (including me!) right now. When I was five I walked to school, as did everyone else. I crossed three roads and somehow always made it, including into my classroom.

No real handover is unusual these days though. At our infant school the reception classes go straight in (they open off the playground). Year 1 and 2 classes are each lined up and marched into the school. There is someone on that door to make sure they don't get back out.

No change on wet days, we do have to stand out in the rain!

We can't just wander into classrooms. If we're late, for example, we handover our child at the office and they walk them round - though if they know you well they might let you with a nod and a wink.

Can you not go into school at all? We have fortnightly coffee sessions with the head, weekly assemblies you're welcome to go to, etc. I'd hate to never cross the threshold. How do you hand in forms, etc?

I abandon ds in the playground on the one day of the week that I drop off near to start time. There are teachers on duty in the playground it is their responsibility/job to make sure ds gets to his classroom. Other days when I'm dropping off at before school care I abandon him in the visitors car park, watch him walk through the gate and into the school. He is 4. He has been at school since Sept and he knows his way around better than me.

At holiday club (at the sister school in a different location) I leave him at the main entrance and he then has to walk out of the main school building, along the side of the playing field, across a playground and into another building. He gets really quite annoyed if I suggest actually taking him to the classroom.

We have no ban on parents going into the classroom so I usually go in and say hello to his teacher once a week.

If we are late then you have to press a buzzer to get the road gate opened and then go into the office.

I dont think you are being pfb or unreasonable at all

In my kids school all parents take their kids to the classroom from nursery up to year 2. We all help to hang up coats etc and hug goodbye.

Yes it can be a bit hectic but by 9.05 almost every parent has gone - I dont see a problem with that method at all, plus if I need to see the teacher for any reason I can etc.

I do think that by the third term of Reception a child should be able to make his way to his classroom by himself.

But the school should probably have explained how wet days work, and having an actual SIGN saying that no parents are allowed seems odd.

DS is starting Reception in September and IIRC the first week parents take the children to their classrooms but after that they do it themselves.

Hmmm.

At our school parents are not encouraged to go into the classrooms or cloakrooms in the morning and the children line up in classes when the bell goes and then file in supervised by their teachers.

On wet days they go straight in, BUT crucially there is a teacher manning the door they go in by. I think that's what's missing in your scenario and you should raise it.

TBH I see why the teachers don't want loads of parents hanging around the classrooms for the busiest part of the day - much better to let them get on with it!

At our school the children all line up in the playground, and then when the bell rings the teachers all come out to get them in (this is certainly true for KS1). We don't escort to classrooms, but then there is no need because we're all there waiting for the teachers to come and take them away.

When it is raining, wet weather procedure is for the children to be left at the main reception (so inside), where the headmistress and TAs direct the little ones (i.e. reception) to their destination, and the other children by then are aware of the procedure (i.e. they walk to their classroom pegs, hang their stuff up and then go to the hall until the bell rings and they are taken to the classrooms by the teachers).

I personally wouldn't have escorted dd to her classroom in reception - but then I never had to because a TA would send them along, and their own classroom TAs were ready to help them with their coats and stuff.

This is a fairly big (2 form entry) primary. It does look fairly chaotic when it is raining and the reception area/foyer is packed, but TBH I think the way it is organised is brilliant. I rather like wet mornings because can leave dd at 8.50 ish instead of 9am when the bell rings

Thank you for all of your comments, I've only just found them!

There really IS a sign saying no parents allowed! If you want to go into the school to drop forms in or anything you have to walk out of the school gate, down the road, and go up to the reception (secretary etc, not class) door. Tbh, as parents we are not feeling particularly welcome...

I did have a waffly word with the class teacher on Monday and said that I wasn't sure what the procedure was on wet days, and that we are also concerned that there does not appear to be anyone to meet the little ones, even on dry days. The teacher looked concerned and said he would write a note to explain things for us all...We are waiting to see what it says! Having spoken to some other mums I have found that I am not the only one finding this odd, and so I now have some back-up if we need to take it further.

Thank you all for your comments and reassurance, Monday was a bad bad day and I don't feel quite so neurotic now!