How much communication do you get from your childs school? What should I expect

[mummyeme]

My dd started reception last Tuesday and I've had no communication from the school whatsoever, I'm new to all this so don't know whats the norm now and wanted to ask before I go into the school.
Dd started last Tues, she has a book bag in which an envelope of letters and phonics sheet have been sent, also a medical form and wotnot but not once has anything been handed to me personally and I've been given no idea of how to work through the sheets and letters with her (I don't want to teach her in the wrong way). The only communication that has been sent is a letter saying that parents should teach the correct letter formation.
I literally drop dd off outside her classroom and pick her up at the end of the day, there isn't any timetable up so I can't tell her that she's doing pe on a certain day, I've got no idea what to expect but I did ask her teacher how she was getting on and just got a "she's fine", end of conversation. There is nothing at all from teacher to parent or from the school at all and her book bag is like a postal service where things just appear but nothing is explained.
Also, she had pe for the first time yesterday and came out from school in a total mess, no buttons on her polo shirt or cardi done up, her T-shirt wasn't tucked in and her skirt wasn't even on properly oh and her tights were round her knees. Pe was in the morning so she'd been left like it all day which made me really annoyed.
Sorry for the long essay, but please can anyone help with whether this is normal, only 9 started last week (bet. 3 classes) so they aren't completely overwhelmed with new children to settle.

Hmmm, this doesn't sound ideal. The school should be allowing for the fact that new parents feel as (or more) anxious than the children sometimes and be sending some sort of info back to you.

I would go in to speak to the teacher - write down the stuff you want to know about so you don't forget what you wanted to say. Another great strategy is ask if you can go in for an hour or so and help in the class room (if you are able)- I have done this and you learn lots about what you could be doing with them through this.

Can't really help much, sorry, but I hope it gets better. I do know that schools tend to think that all parents know stuff from having older kids there etc, which I know isn't the case.

Thankyou,
Have sent away for my crb form to be able to help out and get a better idea as you suggest.
Thankyou, its all a bit daunting at the moment.

Ok, communication sounds poor.
Ours is not brilliant, but here it is:

Every half term a leaflet telling us what topics will be covered in each area of learning.
A note telling us when PE days will be for that half term, also library days.

Before she started, a pack telling us about what was expected of the children in terms of independence, and we got info on Jolly Phonics and letter formation.

We also have one Meet the Parents informal thing, and a proper parents evening later in the year.

We also get a news letter every few weeks.

I would make an appointment to talk to the teacher if none of this has been forthcoming in the next few days.

As for the PE thing, it sounds harsh but is pretty normal. They expect kids at our school to be able to sort themselves out after pe, altohugh they did help where they could for the first week or so. I am surprised they didn't help your DD for the first PE lesson anyway!

The PE thing is pretty normal. TBH I don't send DD in tights on the day she has PE. On those days she wears her trousers! (she is now Year 3 and we still do no tights on PE days - now it is because they get housepoints if they are the first 10 ready - not because she can't do them!)

I would think they will have a parents meeting in the next week or so to go over things like PE days and the topics they are covering.

The letters in the book bag are pretty normal too. Try asking one of the mums with older siblings in the school, she will have a good idea of how things work... I got asked quite a lot of questions by new mums when our DC started in Sept.

I think letters coming back in the school bag is often the way that schools deal with things - not ideal IMHO with tinies, but they do get the hang of it. And you learnt to always check the bag!

About the phonics stuff - I would send in a note asking if there is going to be a meeting for new parents about how to do this since you don't know, and saying if not you'd like to meet with the teacher to go through it.

PE - they often don't have a timetable, so their PE stuff lives in school and their PE slot will vary, sometimes younger ones will get moved around more to fit in with the older ones schedule. As others have said, there is an assumption that they will be able to deal with the clothes you've sent them in, and they generally get the hang of it pretty fast.

I do think schools often forget that just because they have said the same thing over and over it doesn't mean that new parents will know it automatically!