Only adults allowed to watch the Christmas play

[Cupofteaplease]

dd has just started in the nursery unit attached to the local primary school where I used to work as a TA. I know the head is very unfriendly towards the children (he has an attitude of his Ofsted outstanding school would be perfect if it wasn't for the pesky kids!)

The latest news is that only adults and secondary aged children are allowed to attend the Christmas play, and only 2 per child (which I understand). But this means, no babies, no toddler or pre-school aged children, no primary aged children who attend another scool (such as private, or a special needs school). Is it me, or is this a little anti-family, and therefore anti-Christmas?!

I realise the reasons could be space, and crying babies may distract the children, but there are 2 performances for Foundation stage, 3 for KS1 and 3 for KS2, so space shouldn't be a HUGE issues, and it just means that it makes life tricky for some people, especially single parents, who would have to find babysitters for younger children.

I don't know why I'm letting this bother me, as dd1 is in FS so her performances are during the day when I am at uni, so it is very unlikely I will be able to go anyway , but I just feel that it is odd. Does anyone else have this at their dc's school?

Dd1's school does two performances of the Infant's Play (Juniors have a carol concert). At one the Juniors watch and parents can bring baby's/toddlers, I will be taking dd2 this year. The second performance the parents association try to provide a creche so that little ones can be looked after. If a creche is not provided then the little ones go along anyway. It works quite nicely. I am volunteering to help with the creche this year!!!!

I prefer the ones that have 2 showings, one with toddlers and babies, and one without -and then parents can choose.

Children are always welcome at ours. Parents are trusted to take their child out if they are too noisy.

I find the people standing at the front waving camcorders and mobile phones about far more distracting than anything a small child could do.

Havent read all thread but our school has never allowed pre-school children in for the Xmas plays and we have 4 performances!

Our school allows little ones to the afternoon performance, but not to the afternoon mainly because there is not enough room.

I have had one performance ruined by a baby screaming all the way through. It was a production put on by several schools in the local theatre. This little one just screamed and screamed for the whole hour, why his mother didn't take him out I don't know, she was right next to the door.

OP, I'm sure you would take your child out if it was screaming, but you'd be surprised at the number of people who don't.

In my experience most don't because they don't want to miss their older DC; I think it is this selfishness that makes schools do adults only performances.

Blimey - if schools don't welcome small children/families there is really no hope is there?!

Personally I think that's daft and hope dd1's school doesn't have that rule!

They only don't welcome it because parents let babies and toddlers ruin them! If they took them out at the first cry there wouldn't be a problem.

I think its crap. Trouble is, experience has probably led to it.

Better to make one performance 'family-friendly' but ask that children be taken out of the room if they become unsettled.

I'd be massively pissed off if I couldn't take DC4 in to see her brothers and sister at school, and I would anyway - but I'd take her out if she whinged.

I'm sorry I agree with him, I hate seeing the same peoples children spoil it every year, can't wait for them to get the buggers into nursery, I imagine they are counting the days too.

My DD's pre-prep do 2 perfomances, one for families and one for adults.

I think this is fine BUT there are always the same families who think this rule doesn't apply to them and take their pre-schoolers with them (and obviously think it is ok for them to race around shouting).

This yr (yr 4) it is evening performances starting at 7pm (which is my DD's bedtime!) so we are not going together.

KatieDD on Sat 22-Nov-08 19:51:21
"I'm sorry I agree with him, I hate seeing the same peoples children spoil it every year, can't wait for them to get the buggers into nursery, I imagine they are counting the days too."

What about the same parents who spoil it year after year by nattering? Do I have to wait for them to go into the Old People's Home?

Ours is at the local church during the school Christmas carol service (weekday morning so I've had to book a half day holiday to attend). All welcome.

I used to do lots of music school concerts as a child and I was never put off by the pre-school children but I did think that most of the adults were pretty rude - talking whilst waiting for their precious maestro to take the stage and not bother to clap if their child wasn't performing.

Our school do an afternoon performance where children are allowed an devening one where they are not.

If they didn't and I couldn't get a babysitter which meant we couldnt go then we would just withdraw dd from the play.

You would stop your DD from having fun by joining in with her school play?

Yes I would. But she has her Stagecoach prodictions, her dance school show next year plus next year she will take part ina professional touring production so it wouldn;t overly matter.

As it happens her school would never do this and we have been asked to help coach dd in a solo singing role as my dh is a singing teacher.

I wouldn't dream of imposing this rule on the families of the children who perform in our productions.

havent read allthe thread but i work in a primary school and we invite preschool children to the dress rehersal but not to the real thing as its a special occasion for the children and they need the audience to be quiet and attentive. Not unreasoable in my opinion, but then we do provide an opportunity for them to be there. It's never happened but I am sure that we would allow children of school age if they wern't in the play/went to another school etc etc

Wow gingernutlover! I've just looked at your profile pics- what an achievement you have had with your weight loss, you must be so proud! Congratualtions.

Our school runs three plays, one for infants, one for Y3/4, and one for Y5/6. Each play has a dress rehearsal during the day to the rest of the school. Families with babies and toddlers are welcome to attend. Young children are not encouraged to attend the main performance, although I do not think they would actually be turned away. The main performance is during the school day for the infants and in the evening for the juniors.

I could not hear a thing at her nursery play 2 years ago because of a crying baby. It did not occur to the mother to leave the room. I also agree that many parents can be extremely rude, talking during the plays.

DD's school plays and concerts are held in a cramped hall with no sound system. I have never been able to hear the children say their lines over the noise of babies shrieking (the parents never remove them from the hall and just give a 'well that's what babies do' shrug) and often can't see them either because the dads with video cameras position themselves at the front.

I didn't realise how annoying this is until I read this thread! I wouldn't ban tiny children from the performances, but I do like the idea of separate family and adult performances and a creche.

At ds's school play the one performance that was nowhere near full was the one open to children. So I can understand that next time they might not bother with that one as only selling 25 tickets was a bit rubbish. Most parents took it in turns to go a night each without the preschooler.

In theory of course it should be open to all, or at least one "children allowed" and one "adults only" performance, but as others have said unfortunately it's the selfish attitude of some parents who have spoilt it for everyone.

I took DD for her kindy (reception) orientation day last week and while the kids were in the classrooms the head of primary was giving us loads of info that was important. One woman decided that it was ok to let her 3 year old stamp her feet/shout/pull library books off the shelf through the whole thing; we could hardly hear the guy speak. She followed the kid round with a "isn't she cute" look on her face while the rest of us were thinking "take that child out".

I was not really supposed to take dd to ds's leaving play at primary earlier this year but apart from thinking it was such a shame that she couldn't see it because she adores her brother (not that you'd tell on an average day)...I didn't have anyone to look after her and I would have missed it myself.

I took her anyway, all ready to be defiant at the door if anyone said a word. The head greeted us warmly which threw me off guard a tad and I apologised for bringing her, said I would sit her on my lap so she wouldn't be taking up a seat. Head smiled and nodded us through in an "its ok" fashion.

Dd behaved perfectly all the way through, absolutely loved it. Clapped when the adults did and was silent while the children said their lines (she's normally so loud and squeaky). However, if she had played up once I would have taken her straight out.