Am contemplating sending 6 yr old dd to an independent school...

[tissy]

various reasons... she doesn't seem happy at her school, says it's "boring", I don't think she's achieving what she could. In addition, in no particular order, the school buildings are rather run down, there is no secure fence, so dogs poo on the grass, local yobs run on the roof and smash bottles in the playground, her childminders are close to retirement age, and won't be able to do school run much longer.

It's not a bad school as such,probably one of the better ones in the area, but class sizes are going up (19 to 25), and likely to rise more (new estate being built in catchment). Secondary school it feeds to is pretty good, but big.

Private school is smaller, aims for academic achievement, loads of extra curricular activities available (at a price, no doubt). Has a breakfast/ after school club. Con- it's about 15 miles away, and she'd most days have to get the school bus- quite a long journey, once it's visited all the pick-up points. There is no other independent school in the area, so can't shop around!

Am going to ask for a prospectus and look around, but what do I say to a 6 year old to encourage her to accept the idea? She'd lose the friends she currently has, and she's rather nervous of the unfamiliar....

tentative bump

bump

can you afford the fees?

We nearly transfered my dd to an independent when she was 6, we took her to look around and she wanted to go. However dd is not a nervous child at all.

I would take her to the open day as the school will be in selling mode and that way it may appeal to her.

15miles away is quite a long distance, are you sure you want to commit to that commute?

Oh tissy, sorry you've not had any replies on this! I saw your OP, but as both mine went in at nursery level I don't think I can say anything useful other than that I am sure the school will make her feel very welcome and happy. Am guessing smaller class sizes will be a big factor - can you tell her that she might find it easier to make friends in a smaller group?
I think you will find it much easier to persuade her after you have looked around. Six year olds are not very good at accepting the unknown.

25 is not a big class size for the state sector.

yes, can afford the fees

I have missed the open day (was 2 weeks ago)

would not be able to do the commute very often. Currently we take dd to a childminder who then takes her to school.

Independent school has a bus that picks up at a local Little Chef (!), and most days I would drop her at the bus. Three children in our Road go there already, so may be able to arrange car-sharing for pick up and drop off.

Does she know the children on your road. Is is a school with impressive facililties that are likely to win over dd. My dd fell in love with the idea that her school had sheep. To this day she wants to go to an independent school, our house is next to one and she is always asking if she can go.

I realise that 25 is not big, but was very pleased that her P1 Class was only 19. P1 and P2 teachers seemed to have a much better grasp of her by this stage in the term- I got the feeling that the current P3 teacher didn't really know her, IYSWIM.

She is in the top set for English and Maths, but there are only two sets in the year, and set size is determined, apparently, not by what they can manage, but by the size of the room available . I keep banging on about how her reading books are too easy, but it seems that they all progress at the same speed. If she reads to the end of one book, she doesn't get the next until everyone has caught up. She whizzes through her maths worksheet in about 30 seconds flat...

I don't know about sheep! The school uniform is a kilt and blazer, so I'm pretty sure she'd be impressed by that

Can they not put her up a year or two for things like maths, dds old primary did that with her and I have asked for her new school to do it.

I may be wrong but at 6 most kids are not set for subjects.

I can understand why you are dissapointed with the class size, it was the one factor that pursuaded me to consider the independent option, dd class size was 31.

don't know if they can put her up for maths and reading- it would be simple enough to give her the next reading book, and ask her to do two worksheets, rather than 1, but then she would be going at a different speed to the rest of the class, and it seems to be that they can't cope with.

That is quite shit tbh, have you been into the school. Even if you are going to leave there will be other frustrated children and parents who can't afford to make the move and may not have the confidence to say anything.

I've not made a specific appt to discuss this, no, but parents' evening was only two weeks ago. I said I felt that she easily managed the reading and maths. I was then told that she was in top set for both. I suppose I should have been a bit more assertive

I don't think I'd be happy about the distance and travel options. I think your current school could do a lot more.

travel at the moment isn't great, tbh, 20 mins in the car with dh or I , then drop off at cm, and another 20 mins in the minibus to school (cm drops off at 3 local schools, dd's is the furthest), so I suspect total travel time might actually be less.

We moved our DD to a private school this year, she started there in year 1 in September. I was worried about the move however it couldn't have gone better. My DD absolutely loves it. She was a bit upset when we told her last year she was moving however she now has lots of new friends and loves school. At her new school it is very sociable and inclusive, I think because the children come from all around parents make more of an effort to get the children together, to socialise etc. Dont think that she will lose the friends she currently has either. I am making an effort, as are other mums, to keep the children in touch. Also she does clubs locally so is still in touch with other children.

I think you need to be 100% about this move, make sure that you have exhausted all other options i.e. speaking to the head at your current school etc to see if things can be improved. Good luck.

I agree you need to talk to the teacher or headteacher so that if you make the move at least you know you exhausted all avenues. You need to be clear in your mind what you want from this new school and again communicate with the new school.

The travel is not great, we enrolled dd at the school with a view to us moving closer and/or her boarding during the week when she was older if she wanted to.

But as you say the travel is not easy at the moment.

if you can afford it yes then definitely

Do you want more children, can you afford to send more than one?

yes, I will speak to Head of current school .Have just looked at Independent Scool's website again, and the school bus trip takes 25 mins from where we would drop her off (last stop before school). That is a big improvement on what she currently does.

school, obviously. If I spell like that on the application she'll never be given a place!!

no more children in the offing- am 45!

If you know you are not going to have any more, you can afford it and you and dd are happy I would go for it.