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Dd (year 4) struggling at school - what, if anything, can i do?

16 replies

Plonker · 24/10/2008 22:58

Dd is 8 years old. She enjoys the social aspect of school, but hates the work with a passion.

She is not naturally bright and tbh is happy to simply get by. It is a task in itself to get her to do any homework and getting her to read her books (any book, not just school books) is like pulling teeth!

Numeracy is a particular weakpoint and although school haven't flagged any concerns in particular, she does appear to be falling further behind (parents evening is in 2 weeks so will garner further information then).

Dh and I have discussed getting a tutor to try to help her and lift her self-esteem (she says she is 'stupid' ) but then are torn because if feels as though we are forcing her to do something that she detests doing in her 'spare' time.

Do we just leave her to it but continue to support her at home?
Or do we set a little more time aside for her (she has two younger sisters) and do more work at home?
Or do we get a tutor in to give some extra support?

Arrgghh - what do we do for the best??
Please help

OP posts:
AbbeyA · 25/10/2008 08:23

A tutor is not going to be very successful if she doesn't want to do it.
How about starting with computer games?
Woodland Junior School has some good ones.
maths games
literacy games

I would also give her extra time and play board games and card games.Make it fun.

sweeneytodd · 25/10/2008 08:27

I agree with AbbeyA

make the learning fun

lljkk · 25/10/2008 13:55 (I think that's the site). Thanks misdee for linking to that on another thread.
With reading, surely it's always about what they read, find the right subject/text, and they will want to read it.
I suggest frequent visits to the library with her. If all she wants are Simpson's comics and fashion mags, go with it.

lljkk · 25/10/2008 13:56

What does she 'do' in her 'spare' time, Plonker?

smartiejake · 25/10/2008 14:12

You could try a Kip McGrath tuition centre if there is one near you. They cater for all ages and abilities and are very enjoyable and motivating.

Plonker · 25/10/2008 19:51

Thanks all - will have a look at those sites

Thats what i thought really AbbeyA - she would hate to have a tutor so i can't see it being successful unfortunately.

lljkk, you say "With reading, surely it's always about what they read, find the right subject/text, and they will want to read it."

To be perfectly honest, thats what i've always thought, but believe me, no matter what it is, she won't read it. I think we've covered every subject matter and every peice of reading material known to man!!

Oh and she does gymnastics - it takes up quite a lot of her spare time ...she loves it. We did consider dropping her sessions down but that feels like we're taking away something that she's good at, to make her do something that she would really hate . It doesn't impact on her school work as she only goes on two school nights, so not excessive i don't think.

Smartiejake - i'll google that - thanks

OP posts:
lljkk · 25/10/2008 20:17

Ah, what if you found a book in the library about gymnastics, surely such a thing exists?

Plonker · 25/10/2008 20:24

Definitely worth a go

OP posts:
childrenofthecornsilk · 25/10/2008 20:36

Numbershark is an excellent PC resource. It's expensive (about £60) but it's really good. It will see her right through to and during secondary. Wordshark also good.

maverick · 26/10/2008 09:02

I suggest you test her actual reading ability -especially advanced alphabet code knowledge and nonsense words - see the tests on this page:

cory · 26/10/2008 10:05

ABSOLUTELY do not take away her gymnastics!!! She needs something to feel good about. My ds only started developing an interest in his reading after he learnt to swim last summer: he needed to believe he could be good at something first

magentadreamer · 26/10/2008 15:37

My Dd wasn't at all motivated at Primary she's now in yr7 and the change in her is unbelieveable and really enjoys High School. DD just didn't "get" maths and decided she wasn't any good at it. Her teacher in yr6 stated she'd "scrap" a level 4 in her SATS. I became the mum on a mission poor child. There are loads of sites online that will make maths fun - DD actually like playing these and it was so much easier to get her to "mess" about online then actually sit down with a pen and paper and do sums. I think someone else mentioned Kip Mcgrath centres DD started there at the end of June and enjoys it - she does Maths plus spellings.I did think about a tutor for DD but realised that 1 to 1 was probably not the best for her but being in a group of 4 to 1 really suits her.

The change in DD is remarkable she now loves Maths and will actually say I'm good at it in a non show offy manner I'd add! DD did indeed get her level 4 at the end of KS2 and last week in her half term Maths test got a level 5b. One thing I would add is don't cut back on her Gymnastics as that would just be seen as a punishment and make things more strained. As for reading for pleasure I'd suggest books on Gymnastics plus any story books about gymnasts.

janinlondon · 27/10/2008 09:24

Plonker my DD (yr 4) was inspired by the Mathletics website. Worth a look.

Plonker · 27/10/2008 09:27

Maverick - just asked her to do the reading test and she was pleasantly surprised to see that she came out with a reading age of 9.2 (she is 8.9)

She was also able to do most of the alphabet code and all of the nonsence words. This makes me feel that its not her reading that is the problem, per se, it is her reluctance to do it, or rather my failing to find something that fires her, that is the problem.

Cory - no, i'm not going to take away her gymnastics, as you say, its so important for her to do things that she's good at Glad your son is doing well now

Thanks for sharing that MG its good to hear your dd is getting on great now

OP posts:
Plonker · 27/10/2008 09:28

childrenofthecornsilk and janinlondon - i will take a look at those resources ...thanks

OP posts:
maverick · 27/10/2008 10:06

Plonker, that's good news -always a good idea to check though when someone is reluctant to read

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