Reception teacher a bit unsympathetic

[traceybath]

My DS (august born) has just started in reception and seems to be loving it. The TA has several times told me how lovely and kind he is - she's also told other parents that he's an incredibly kind boy.

However i'm finding it hard to relate to his teacher. A couple of weeks ago he'd fallen over and she told me when i picked him up and rolled her eyes saying he over-reacted. I know he is a tad dramatic and told her this but was slightly perplexed by the eye-rolling - he is only just 4.

Anyway since the start of term i've had 4 head injury forms for him and today she took me aside to say he'd fallen (been pushed) over and had made a big fuss - again accompanied by the eye rolling. When i got him out of the class i lifted his fringe and he'd got a massive bump on his head.

Now i know he needs to learn not to act like a baby but did feel a bit sad that he'd clearly really hurt himself and it was just treated as though he was being silly.

So do you think its ok if tomorrow morning i do mention that he did have a nasty bump or will she think i'm being overly precious?

I wouldn't talk to her about it as she seems a bit lacking in empathy (giving her the benefit of the doubt it may be because she's been dealing with this for 20 years etc) and she might just write you off as a moany-mum.

Perhaps speak to the TA who clearly understands your DS's temperament better and say that you're working on helping your DS to cope well with playground incidents and would welcome her help, like a quick cuddle for DS and then some distraction techniques?

Then you can rest assured that he's getting a bit of TLC and avoid any potentially difficult conversations with his teacher?

I suspect she's trying to play it down. He does need to learn when to make a fuss and when not, or he won't get attention when he most needs it. I often found the TA's more approachable and less rushed in the early years anyway. 4 such incidents would concern me , not necessarily for his overreaction or how it was handled but for why they occurred and if there was any pattern. By all means mention it in passing but not make a specific issue.

I totally get the playing it down and we do that at home but i guess i'd have felt a little happier if she'd actually checked if he had hurt himself.

It was the rolling of the eyes that just bugged me i guess.

Will mention it to the teaching assistant as suggested.

Thanks!

Tracey I understand your concerns, especially with him being so young. My DD1 is also (late) August and is the youngest in her year, her birthday is within two weeks of the start of the September term, so she was only just 4 when she started Reception last year. Add to this her small size (she is still only 25th centile for weight and height, so a petite child) and she was always going to be bumped around and stuff.

I think sometimes the staff need to be reminded that some children are almost a year younger than many of the others in the class, and would still be in pre-school if they had been born a week or two later. The difference between an only just 4 year old and a nearly 5 year old is huge, and whilst he may be a bit of a drama king (??) he is still just a baby in some ways and is therfore a bit more fragile and immature emotionally than the older children in his class.

Happily, DD1's reception teacher was a wonderful lady who really engaged her children and made sure each and every one was getting the time and care they needed. DD1 would still be in her class again this year if she could! It sounds to me like the TA is like this and as AnotherFineMess says, is perhaps the better one to approach on this. But it wouldn't hurt to mention to the teacher that you feel that your DS may need a little more attention at playtime etc, as he does have quite a big bump on his head and may need a little hlep learning to stand up for himself etc, seeing as he's only just 4.......