Would you mind if your school's head teacher was gay?

[seeker]

Someone started a thread on this topic a few days ago, and I was delighted at the tolerant attitudes shown. However, the thread's title didn't really say what it was about, so I'm not sure the OP got a full range of opinions. So I thought I'd try this and see what happens. Sorry to hijack your discusion, linney!

no. Why would/should it make a difference?

Not at all

Nope.

My sister went to her head teacher's civil ceremony recently, which was apparently a quite fabulous occasion.

I do also agree with Marina, though, re the homophobia that's out there.

Not at all.

However, a gay male friend of my parents had a terrible time due to his sexuality.

He was a Headteacher, and is a very handsome man.

Lots of the Mums fancied him, and he never told any of them he was gay. (In fact, officially, his parents still don't know, and he is 58).

Anyway, a Mum made a pass at him, and he told her he was gay. A few days later, she took her son out of school and told everyone that our friend had molested her son.

He was suspended, and went through a terrible time until he was eventually cleared in court. Most of the other parents at the school automatically believed the mother.

He is teaching again now, but it was terrible.

ok, let me explain- how would you like to be the subject of such an enquiry- would you find it hurtful or sad to think that people mind your existance?

Or mind you being in a job where you have access to children?
This is not the first thread like this (would you mind a lesbian au pair).

Oh, you dont mind? How tolerant, thank you.

And let me predict the 'healthy debate' responses.

BooBooBeDoo - bloody Hell.

Well I have definitely revised my view of them Fennel sure - but after 25 years of working/adult life I remain dismayed at how many people still feel it is OK to talk this way.

I think linney posed her original question because she wanted to gauge the possible reaction of the parents at her school - I really don't see a problem with that. There are deeply unpleasant homophobic people in the world. I thought that the phrasing of her enquiry meant that she would get a limited range of answers, and decided to start another thread with a more provocative title. Frankly I am surprised that it hasn't brought the 'haters" out of the woodwork. Because it's no use pretending they don't exist - either here or in rl.

Oh and, charliegal "how dare you assume that I'm heterosexual"?

how am i assuming you are heterosexual?

"you might be delighted at the tolerant attitudes but please think about the effect these thread titles have on gay mumsnetters."

Sounds like an assumption to me...!

of course not

Marina is spot on and it's not just homophobia which still exists but there would be a far greater damning of the OP had the question been "Would you mind if your school's Head Teacher was Black".

There is a lot of "tolerating" which goes on purely due to the pc nature of our society and it is insulting.If people have a problem with my sexuality I would rather know-not be tolerated as I suspect happens frequently.

I have a realtive who would never be seen to be racist in public but uses the most vile terms in "private" which would get him locked up if the wrong person were to hear.

No I wouldn't mind at all.

apologies if you are gay.
Maybe I should have said 'consider the effect on me', as they always upset me!!
Wont speak for other lesbians on mn.

Couldn't care less as long as they're good at their job.

So how would you like the question to be asked? Or do you think the questions shouldn't be asked at all? I agree that in an ideal world the question should be irrelevant - but this is not an ideal world and Linney needs to have strategies in place to deal with possible negativity. I am assuming that she is in a position to do that. Sorry again, Linney, for the hijack!

Nothing wrong with a straight question in my view......
I personally don't find the question offensive and I suspected that nearly all the asnwers would be "no of course not" partly becasue those homophobes out there probably wouldn't have the balls to admit it.

For the school I work in its not a hypothetical question. Our head teacher is gay and completely open about it. His partner often goes to school functions.

As I work for a special school the kids are about as vunerable as you can get. Some of them know that the head teacher is gay, but many of them are in their own world and aren't like to notice.

Anyway it does not affect their the children's education. Our headteacher is very good and gifted at his job.

When I was younger I went to a small private school for a year where the head teacher was openly gay. It didn't affect the quality of my education twenty years ago either.

There is a major shortage of dynamic headteachers with the skills to run a good school. As a parent all I care about is that the teacher is effective. What happens between two consenting adults in private is not my business.

no, pass the biscuits please

Regardless of how you ask the question there will be racists and homophobes and biggots, I think the more the questions are asked the more it is debated it will eventually be more accepted. But you have to have the debate let people debate and air their bigotted and ignorant views to get to that point. I think it's more of a gradual process to change these ingrained backdated beliefs, you can't just wave a magic wand.

Everyone is entitled to debate and say what they think even if you think it's wrong.

I don't know.

I don't think it is anybody's business whether a teacher is gay or not. Actually, I couldn't care less about their personal lives as long as it is legal.

But if a headteacher made an issue of their own sexuality I would find that annoying. In my final year of primary school we had a teacher who twittered on about her love life and relationships in a way that was completely inappropriate. IMHO all professionals should keep the intimate details of their personal lives private.

I think people should make a public issue of sexuality. Especially people who are working with children. How else are children to make sense of their own sexuality? Keeping quiet about sexuality as a "private matter" is just a way of encouraging heteronormativity.

There has always been gay teachers and there always will be. About 5 to 10% of adults are gay and they do all kinds of jobs. Its like saying do you object to gay policemen, gay doctors or gay traffic wardens? (I know there are people who get their knickers in a twist about gay priests. )

Upwind, Do you think I should be banned from wearing my wedding ring to work? It shows the kids that I am married. I have a little picture of my son in my office. Do you think that should go? My husband is sometimes invited to school functions like the partners of all staff. Our headteacher should have the same right to bring his partner.

Actually having gay headteacher is very dull. He isn't any different to a talented hetrosexual teacher. He wears a suit to work rather than bondage and leathers. Inset days are still very dull.

I agree with Fennel. (There's a surprise, then.)

Our head is dead glam, I do hope she's a lesbian. Pity to waste her gorgeousness on some bloke.