What is the most memorable comment from your child's school report?

[fridayschild]

DS1's report mainly says that he does X, enjoys Y and really enjoys Z. But the best comment of all, and the one that means we will keep his report from Reception for ever and for always is

"[DS1] does not always know what his arms are doing"

What's your classic comment?

In the mists of report lore, I love this one for Maths:

5%: I was wrong.

When asked for clarification, the response was look at last year's report:

6%: can't do any worse.

For music: 'Sings with enthusiasm and rhythm'
...but not, we note, with any hint of a tune

RE reports

DD1 "I get the impression she would rather sit & read a book than have to study RE"

(er yeeeeesss !!! )

DD2- has a strong "moral code" & is not afraid to voice her opinions!

(obstinate & argumentative then??!)

DD never lacks a companion

'is a very popular member of the class'
'has been a pleasure to teach' - seems to be frequesntly used by teachers!

Nothing especially academic was mentioned

'DD has a lovely group of friends.' I don't care about her friends being lovely - I want to hear SHE is lovely!

dd (YR) "DDs' bubbly personality always keeps us smiling. She is in competition with me as to who can talk the most."

(so like her mother it's untrue!)

Not a report moment, but definitely memorable...

Have just got back from DD1's end of term church service. I stood and chatted to her teacher, while DD went to the loo, which was in the foyer. There we were, exchanging pleasantries about how bright my daughter is, she's very intelligent, keeps them all entertained, lovely to teach, blah, blah, blah.

Was feeling nicely smug about my perfect child, when out of the corner of my eye, I suddenly noticed the child in question, hanging right out of the toilet door, bright pink knickers conspicuously round her ankles, yelling at the top of her voice "mummmmeeeee, I need heeeeeeeeeelp!" In church. In front of ... now let me see, four class teachers, a handful of TAs, the Assistant Head, the Vicar, several parents ........

Am willing to bet that my child's toilet-related exploits are going to be among the teachers' abiding memories of this year

"DD does not get upset when interacting with others as she has developed a number of effective strategies to influence her peer group"

Translation: she gets her own way a LOT

DD is 4, BTW!!!!!

Oh, and "her enthusiasm is boundless"
Yes, and exausting!

She also won a prize in dance and her teacher said to me it was because "she is the youngest in class but the only one who genrally pays attention"
Ahhh....

I loved my nieces report at parents evening. She is at college doing an IT course

DN can multitask, she can chat on msn during lessons, but still remains top of the class.

From their Reception reports:

"Ds can appear not to be listening, but this does not seem to be having an adverse effect on his learning".

(ie he doesn't listen, but they can't prove it yet!

"Dd has begun to swim with recognisable strokes"

...as opposed to flailing around in the water

I am bitterly disappointed with the lack of amusing comments in DCs reports so far, all very bland, but my favourite from mine is a comment from my headteacher (female) when I was in the 6th form,

"While I must draw attention to BellaDonna's affection for short skirts I have to admit she has the legs for them"

PMSL. How awful if she'd said the opposite LOL.

Ds takes part in class discussions with muh enthusiasm, but needs to learn when it's time to listen.

The one that came straight to mind about DS1 was "He is a pleasure to teach." He has had that 3 years running now.

Neither of them had anything really funny this year, but the first sentence of the general comments summed them up perfectly for me.

The phrase in DS1's Y5 report is: "DS1 is a bright and excitable pupil who has been a pleasure to teach." I think 'excitable' says it all really....

In Y2 he got "DS1 is a little boy with boundless energy and an awful lot to say for himself."

This year his teacher has used the word 'enthusiastic' and variants thereof 9 times!

DS2 (Y2) is a "lively, intelligent boy who thrives on learning more about almost anything!" Fortunately DS2 is also a 'delight to teach' so I can relax.

x always seems to be having a wonderful time with his friends-in ds1's report which made me smile.

and in ds'2's report.y is good comapny and i shall miss him next year.

After an open evening i told my DD that her teacher said that she had a wicked sense of humour. DD looked at me and said 'WHAT! SHE CALLED ME WICKED!!

lol shalom - dd came home outraged that her housemistress had called her a 'real brick' the other day. We forget how colloquial expressions are often lost on children.

I think the funniest thing on this terms reports was "I haven't taken her yawning in class on Monday mornings as a reflection on my teaching".

When I was in Primary 2 aged 6. My report card read.

'mamadiva enjoys taking part in discussions, infact if I were to leave the room I'm sure mamadiva would stand and teach class with all her wisdom'

My mum was in stitches.

snorkle-does your daughter go to malory towers?

Tmmj, it sounds rather Blytonesk, but I suspect the reality is more mundane - though not through lack of effort on dd's part.

We do find that dd brings out teacher's humour on reports etc far more than ds does. (Anyone else with 2 dcs find that?)

Some extracts from dd's last summer's report which had us in stitches (this years was rather more down to earth)...

"having her in the class has certainly not been dull!"
"is a loose canon in ICT ... has an excellent, if unauthorised command of control panel functions"
"never lose your eccentric moments"
"has a rather zany sense of humour"
".. is always great fun to teach"

Remember my worst ever comment from a teacher (on a history project, not a report):
"I'm not sure if the spelling mistakes in this project are due to X's own incompetence or the book from which she copied this" !!!

ICT report:

"Cal often helps other children with their ICT and can be called upon to assist the teachers with technical problems when they arise"