Moving schools reflections and thoughts welcome only supportive and no trolling or unkindness !

[Wills2026]

Hey

I’ve had bad experiences on here hence the title , I’ve come on here for genuine support and I’m sure it’s out there .

anyway , I would just like to hear other ppls thoughts pls I have no issue with directness and harsh realities if it’s delivered in a respectful way and kind way

I am aware in every school there’s issues with bullying , issues with teachers , common themes and I know by moving a child schools these issues are not going to go away , I am a parent and know my responsibilities and don’t expect much from teachers other than to teach kids in a respectful way , I don’t expect my kids to be shouted at and I expect as a parent to be treated non judgmentally , I don’t expect teachers to even contact me unless there’s an issue I know how much pressure staff are under how much complaints they get from parents and what demands are on them but is it reasonable to expect my child to be in a school where she’s happy and feels safe !

For context my daughter is 5 in reception , she has no issues with toileting or behaviour problems . she was refused to use the toilet stating at playtime by a teacher who has kids the same age , saying the door was locked and she wasn’t allowed to go , my daughter then went on to wet herself in front of the class - as a parent how would you feel and would you consider moving your kid schools ?

the learning mentor totally broke my trust on something and it wasn’t within the whelms of confidentiality I asked to be put on a parent course which she had links to through the family centre I then changed my mind opting to go down a different route - she then passed my details on after I’d said no thank you she’d asked the course ppl to ring me anyway and they agreed who does she think she is

the Head master looks at you as a parent in the eye , doesn’t even say hello and completely ignores you as a parent but will say hello to your child erm what this has happened on several occasions

the teacher tells the child they can’t say there bored and dismisses why they’re bored .

the teachers children both of them on two separate occasions are observed bullying and assaulting other children including sen children

the school bully says some very unkind stuff to your child more than twice , I raised it in a letter with the head teacher , I got a crap reply saying they can’t do anything because my daughter didn’t report it to them on the day but as a parent reporting it it’s dismissed and holds no weight my daughter then gets annoyed at her twice and says some unkind stuff back and then gets made to write an apology letter wt actual fck ! I told school I didn’t agree with it and why and they made her do it anyway

is it just me or would all of you as parents be loosing your siht by now ?

A 5 year old not being allowed to to go to the toilet when they needed to, would be my main concern here I think. If the school won't acknowledge that this was a misjudgement by the teacher then yes I would look to move your DC elsewhere if it's possible.

The toilet issue, I’d be asking what the general rules are. It seems unreasonable to expect YR pupils to be refused to go to the toilet so I’d be questioning this.

The learning mentor thought you needed help - which you asked for, then changed your mind - so she asked the family centre to contact you anyway. She was being helpful and supportive to you as she must think you’re struggling with something. She’s just doing her job.

It’s not unusual for a HT to focus on chatting to a child and not the parent. Not worth worrying about.

A teacher would say you cant be bored because there’s always lots to do in a YR classroom. When children complain of being bored it’s usually because they’re not engaging with anything.

Bullying is always going to be a problem as children can be horrible to each other. Only get involved if it’s your child and ensure your child reports anything straight away. Make sure you have the bullying policy so you know about behaviour expectations and sanctions. Also be realistic about what your child is telling you and what actually happens.

I wouldn’t be losing my shit but I’d be asking a few questions I think but nothing that would make me want to move schools.

Of course we want our children to be safe and happy at school. Nothing you’ve said here would make me think my child is unsafe. Just my respectful opinions based on what you’ve detailed in your post.

Just for clarification, how much of this is your own observation, and how much is your child's recollection?

Absolutely no shade thrown here, as I have a DD in y1, and sometimes she and her friend can be unreliable narrators so things do sometimes need to be checked or clarified because the way they see and understand the world can be different to adults.

I would be concerned about the toilet break scenario (and look into this further), and maybe look into the school bully stuff a bit more. However, I agree with the post above on most points.

It sounds as though you have lost confidence in the school in a number of ways and a fresh start may help.

The main thing is that your daughter is settled and happy in school. If she is, fine. If not, look at schools that have places in the year group for the start of term.

Totally agree. Doesn't need anything else.

The first point about a reception child being denied access to the toilet would be enough to want me to move schools.

I am neurodiverse any has a rough start to reception through no fault of the school but went on move schools twice in infant school due to moving house and settled fairly well both times, I loved the final school that I stayed at through to Y6.

Thanks for your opinion it was respectful and appreciate it , respectfully when someone withdraws there consent that’s what it means it’s withdrawn so legally she is not in a position to pass on personal details , and it’s breach of data protection

in regards to bullying I’ve looked at the policy and no where does it support what has been actioned

a ht ignoring someone is rude in my opinion it might be usual but for me and a few parents I know it’s unacceptable but we are all different and appreciate the difference of
opinions

Yes I know what you mean however her actual class teacher confirmed the toilet incident was true , and it did happen , but also I work with kids for a living so I feel confident in recognising narration from fact , don’t get me wrong I don’t take everything she says as gospel but in her character and usual behaviour and her capacity it wouldn’t be in her usual behaviour or capacity to lie about certain stuff I also can catch her out usually I say oh so if I ask Mrs … teacher about that quickly she will say nooooo don’t do it she will say I’m not telling the truth and I say well are you fibbing and she will smile and say yes she’s a bad liar hahahah

Sorry just to add about being bored , I disagree and work with teachers , children will say they’re bored for a variety of reasons they actually mean something else rather than being bored , or the works not stimulating enough academically she’s above average so she may need more challenging work , the point is the teacher was being dismissive and not exploring why she was bored for example she may need extension work or something else to stimulate her brain

She is outgoing and has lots of friends and hates going to school I can see she’s not happy

If you child is not happy and you have concerns I would move her. Do you know if any other schools you feel would suit her better? You could put in an in year application now and hopefully she could start somewhere new for year one.