Having to remove DD from local private school - what would you do?

[dontknowwhattodoforbest]

Won't go into too much detail on reasons as they don't matter but having to remove DD from her school - she loves it but we don't have any choice. She is in a class of 15 (currently in reception).

My options are limited as of today as it has been half term and have not been able to check if there are any places in local state schools.

Option 1 would be to send her to the local primary which is VERY large and she would be in a class of 30 (there are 6 reception classes), she already has two friends who attend this school but bit concerned she will be a duck out of water with it being so large. Very good school - probably one of the best in area.

Option 2 - have a look at the other local primaries but she will not know anyone there (I know she will make friends but was hoping to make the transition easier for her).

Option 3 - send her to wonderful school at the bottom of my mum's road which has a class size of 22 (23 should she enrol). Her best friend from Nursery attends and also the daughter of one of my friend's. It is a very similar environment to the school she is leaving (atmosphere and size). It has a very good Ofsted report BUT it is 8 miles away and is not local to us. My heart says this school but my head says to stick to our catchment.

Am in turmoil, would like some advice please!

Do you not pay termly at your private school, op?

And with a term's notice necessary?

I'd be really surprised if a school with 4 classes per year group didn't have places come up on a pretty regular basis. We were told dd1's school had no Y3 places for ds when we moved house last spring, but by July he was offered a place for September (and it's a hugely over-subscribed school with only two classes per year group). Bear in mind that at state schools there's no financial penalty for not keeping the school informed of your plans, so it's not at all uncommon for places to come up with no notice at all.

Go on the waiting list for all of them and wait to see what happens. Alternatively phone up, be a bit pushy and ask how often places do come up, whether they think there might be any movement, how you really like the school, blahblah. Phone them enough to make it clear you're really serious (but not enough to be a nuisance, obviously) -- the schools do have quite a lot of discretion over the waiting list once they LEA are no longer involved (almost certainly the case for Y1+ places).

Katebee - yes that is an option but I need to sort this out asap for my sanity. I couldn't spend the next 3 months worrying about where she is going to go.

Cammelia - no, we pay monthly, makes it easier that way . A terms notice is necessary but they have upped their fees 13% with only half a terms notice and with that being one of the factors which makes us have to remove her, I don't think they have a leg to stand on. One of the parents has removed her DS for this reason, she has not had to give a terms notice.

Frogs - that is one of the options I am considering but as I said in my above post, I cannot take the risk of a place NOT coming up ifswim.

But you can accept a place at the school 8 miles away for September (given that the private school will probably make you pay till the end of term anyway) and still stay on the waiting list for the more local schools.

I agree with Frogs. I would take the place for september at the school 8 miles away but put your daughter on the waiting list for any local schools you like as well. Hopefully a place will come up.

I would try to wait until the end of term to move your daughter - this will give longer for a place to come up at a local school. It
would be better for her surely to finish the term where she is. The only way I would move mid term would be if the state school place comes up and they say you have to take it now.

The school 8 miles away sounds lovely but you mention on your post on the other board (education) that your DHs petrol costs are high and I'm worried you will find that yours are too with a school 8 miles away. My daughters school is 5 miles away and a £70 tank of petrol doesn't last long..unless your journey is fast dual carriageway.

or another option is to home educate for the last 6 weeks of term and see if a place comes up at one of the local schools in the meantime.

with a year group of 120-ish pupils there will be some who move away over the summer or end of term and a place is likely tocome up.

are there no other schools in the area to check out?

Most private schools also ask for a terms notice, so you will probably be expected to pay for Autumn term also.

Some fee paying schools have a bursary that can be applied for, I think they have to offer one free place to meet the requirements of nursery grants. I applied for it once at dd's school and got it!

If you are asking the school to temporarily fund a place (unlikely imho) can you guarantee that you will not have interrupted income at some future point? Also if she is in reception, fees are unlikely to be more than £4-5k per year. In yr 3 I am paying £11k+, you need to have a think about if it is financially viable for you to attempt to keep her in.

I'm sorry that you are having a tough time, I hope it all works out for the best.

fwiw, my DD's fee paying school is 6 miles away but she does attend Brownies at a small nearby village (I live in middle of knowhere) closest to our house, she has settled in well and has recently been on a 5 day camp.

All good advice thanks.

Katebee - my DH can drop DD off at the school 8 miles away as he passes it and my mum will collect her and meet me half way with her so all in all my fuel will only be around 15 miles tops a day. Not too bad.

Re moving her mid term, my reasons for this are a) it gives her less time to worry about the move and b) it is a quiet time of year in schools, they do less so she wouldn't have as much pressure on her. It wouldn't feel as big a huge step as starting brand new on the first day of term in a new year. I will see what the Heads say at both the schools though. Personally, I would rather make the break now, I know how my DD works, her personality would suit a fast change now, not us all worrying over the holidays whether she will like it or not.

RE the waiting lists, I see where you are all coming from but I would far rather send her to a smaller school with a similar feel to the school she is at now with only 22 in the class than send her to a local one which is HUGE and she will have even more of a shock. There are no guarantees a place will come up between now and July. I have to make a decision asap as it is starting to stress me out too much. To be left hanging on a string wondering where she will go will affect me too much I think.

Marmaduke - there is NO way they will ask me for Autumn's fees as well, they have upped the fees 13%, one of the reasons why we will struggle to pay, they only let us know 2 weeks ago so imo, they have no right to ask for a full terms notice when they have only given half a terms notice of the fee increase.

One of the Mum's handed her notice in for her DS last week, he never mentioned Autumn's fees so he best not to me!

Dont assume that because you are told the school is full that you won't get your DD in. Firstly people move around all the time, secondly if it is your local school and there isn't a viable alternative the LEA can force the school to take her. Give your LEA a call to check the situation and get a transfer form filled in just in case!

As others have said whilst it is very upsetting to have to move your child, she will be fine. They are still all making friends at this young age and all play together. We are actually in the process of moving our DD from our local school and whilst it is a very very difficult decision to make I know it is for the best.

Lastly I would, as others have suggested, go and speak to the head of your current school but only if you believe that given a bit of time you be ok and able to afford fees. If know you are going to have to move your child anyway I would do it now.

Good luck!

It sounds as if you are getting pretty strong messages from your 'inner self' that the school near your parents' house is the right one for your DD. In that case - assuming they have a place - I'd forget about putting her name on waiting lists, and go for that one. You know the kind of school that your DD is used to, and the kind of school that will suit her personality.

I really hope you don't get billed for a term's fees as well as the fees for the rest of this term!! Our prep school's policy is a term's notice or a term's fees in lieu, but maybe they vary (and there is a precedent at your DD's school). Good luck...

I agree if the school has only given half a term's notice for a fee increase then they have in effect breached their side of the contract and can't insist on a term's notice from you.

Though they'd probably be within their rights to insist on a further terms fees at the old rate.

Well, to say I am gobsmacked is an understatement - went to see the Head today at DD school - he is going to talk to the bursar as in his words "I don't like to my children, we will most probably be able to help you, even if it is only until she finishes Year 2". I said to him "I was more worried that you would charge me for the rest of the term" - he said he wouldn't do that.

Well what a fabulous man. Just goes to show that they do care and it is not just about the money.

He is going to let me know Thursday what they propose.

We may have a reprieve. I am not getting too excited but it sounds promising.

On the other hand, I went to see the school by my mums. Very happy with it, it was lovely, would be more than happy to send her there.

That is such great news on all fronts. Good luck on Thursday!

Dontknowwhattodoforbest, so pleased to hear this news because at the very least it buys you time so that you can make a fully considered choice.Well done you!
Our school is relatively local , but not many locals go there! We meet local kids through Rainbows, swimming etc.

Thanks ladies, appreciate your kind words. Has definitely helped me.

Fingers crossed that they come back with what I want to hear!

Update!

Head at DD1's school came back to me and offered to reduce her fees 1/3 for 2 years which was wonderful but we decide to remove her as financially, in 2 years we could be worse off, and DD2 will be ready for pre-school and there is NO way I want to be removing DD1 because we can't afford £11000 a year in fees.

Went to see a WONDERFUL state school today 10 mins from us. It was fabulous, will be enrolling DD there. Whilst I was there it made me wonder why I enrolled DD in the private school at all - it had great facilities, far better than her school. Head was great, very enthusiastic and their Ofsted is Outstanding.

Now got to break the news to DD...