Leaving daughter on school grounds in the morning?

[MomofAM]

Hi guys! Badly need some advice as I didn’t go to school in the UK, I grew up in America and didn’t have any issues like this because of school buses.

I have a son in reception - their class doors open at 8:40am.
I have a daughter in Year 1, their class doors open at 8:45am.

I need to be at work by 9am latest. If I leave at 8:40am, I could make it. However, if I leave at 8:45am, I won’t. I’ve said to my daughter that she can play on the school playground for like 4-5 minutes (8:40-8:45) and then when her year group goes in, she can follow. She is a very mature 6 year old and I know she would be absolutely fine.

Just wondering if this okay to do? I’m really nervous about it for some reason. Also concerned that if I ask the school about it and they say no then I’ll be stuck - I’ll probably have to quit my job then.

It’s a completely normal thing to do in Scotland. Kids get the bus to school, walk to school themselves or get dropped at the gate from primary 1. Some parents hang around and some don’t.

but england is culturally quite different so best to check with the school.

No you can’t do this OP. What if the fire alarm goes off during those 4 minutes and nobody is responsible for your 5/6 year old? You need to pay for breakfast club, find a parent to ask, or speak to your employer and explain things will be starting 5 mins later until you can sort out a breakfast club or parent.

Is there a breakfast club? It’s a pain but it is probably worth it for the peace of mind. Ours is £4.50 a day. If you aren’t wanting actual breakfast they let you drop off whenever before school. Bit earlier if you actually want them fed (Although you’d have to pay for both then)

Absolutely not. In that 5 mins, no-one is responsible for her. You absolutely cannot reasonably leave a Year 1 child completely unattended for any amount of time. As a teacher, I am shocked you think this is in any way acceptable. A safeguarding concern would be reported as soon as the school became aware of this.

Our area allows kids to walk home from P4 so 9years. You would be expected to be with them before school until that age too

Where’s their dad in this? If you’re still together then can he do school drop offs?

Otherwise you’ll need to pay for breakfast club annoying as that is.

I was thinking how wild these responses are until I read your post! Scotland here and it's very different. At my boys, inner-city school:

• If you need to use breakfast club- drop at 8am onwards.
• Staff bring breakfast club kids out at 8:45 to run off steam in the playground.
• Plenty other kids in the playground playing from around 8:30/40.
• Some parents stay outside the gates to wave kids off when bell goes- no parents ever allowed in playground.
• Bell goes at 9am & they line up.
• If wet, kids go straight inside to the communal area - usually art things out/ music playing.
• End of the day kids brought out in lines & collected by parents who wait outside the gates - they must see a recognised face to collect them until primary 4 (age 8) when they can leave by themselves.
• Older siblings can take younger ones home as soon as Primary 2 (age 6).

I did a combination- 2 days staying until the bell/ 3 days dropped at 8am as I'm also a teacher part time.

I think it's different based on area. Also Scotland & we were expected to wait. Younger siblings weren't allowed to be collected by an under 16. They can walk home themselves from P4 so 9 years

^
Most schools will not take responsibility until actual school start time and will not allow parents to just leave young children. 6 is still quite young!

In that case I would look into breakfast club. If you're only just making it home in time to teach a lesson at 9am when you drop off at 8:40, every morning is going to be a rush before you even consider the issue of Year 1 being a later drop off. You're lucky it's 8:40 for Reception as most schools are 8:45.

Leaving your daughter alone on the playground is absolutely not an option. Gates are open. Even if you don't dream she would run off, she could still fall and hurt herself. If you ask the school they'll obviously say no. If you leave her unattended without asking the school they will log it as a safeguarding concern if they find out (which they will, the teacher will soon notice she's coming in unattended every morning).

You need to sort something soon. Is it private tutoring you do? Are you certain there is no wiggle room? Your clients may appreciate a 9:15am (for example) start. If it's run through an agency I understand it's more difficult, but even then you don't know unless you ask. If it's a firm no, breakfast club really is your best bet. Some schools do a cheaper rate if your children don't actually have breakfast there but you just require a slightly earlier drop off. So you drop 8:30am, they enjoy playing with friends for 10/15mins before school but they're supervised and safe. If your school offer anything like that, that would definitely be your best option. Then you get get home in plenty of time, and start work more relaxed without all the rushing around.

Agreed

my 2 got the bus from P1 which dropped them at the bus stop near the school. They then all wandered up the path to the school and played in the playground till the bell went - 20 minutes or so later

the breakfast club kids would usually be out playing about the same time

although ours got made to stay out in the rain ☔️

so I almost never did drop off

the attitudes down south are so different

Unfortunately it's not allowed.

You will have to ask someone to keep an eye on them or breakfast club.

Maybe speak to the school to see of they can help you come to a solution. They might let you drop them off earlier or something.

Our school is very supportive and would probably want to know about issues like these.

This is a 6 year old

@GonnaeNoDaeThatJustGonnaeNoyou let a 5 year old get off a bus and play unsupervised in a playground for 20 minutes? Was this a long time ago?
Sp what happens when your child falls over or do you expect other parents to sort them out?

I understand your frustration. Here juniors start at 8.30, Reception start at 8.40 and yr1&2 at 8.45. My train leaves at 8.49 and the station is about 5 mins away. I would end up missing the train at least 50% of the time, even if I ran. Generally parents ask each other to keep an eye on the children. I do this about once a week when I really need to get the train. I have often thought no-one would really notice if I left him alone (I never actually would), but that is also kind of the point that no-one would be watching if there was an issue.

You definitely need to talk to the school. They may arrange for her to go into school early. You can't leave her alone, if you don't ask for permission the school will still know as they will see a lone child in the playground and be concerned.

This. Im a teacher and children are frequently dropped off in the playground early. Maybe not in Primary 1 but definitely in the older age ranges. There is no supervision by staff until the bell as that's up to the parents.

Definitely ask another mum...I used to do this for a mum who had a child in another school so had to rush off and couldn't wait for the doors to open. It was no bother...I was there anyway

Another parent would do it for sure! It’s only 5 minutes and you could return the favour by offering to be a back up for pick up or invite for play dates.
Can’t work allow a 9:15 start if you take it off your lunch break?

Yes. I know. And?

Yes of course I did.

And so did everyone else. That’s how we do it in Scotland. Completely normal

how along ago - my youngest has just gone to high school so current

what happens if they fall over - they pick themselves up and take themselves off to first aid.

no parents in the playground

The school won't allow it. Do they have breakfast club?

Can't you use a bike or something and get home in ten minutes?

If you only have a 4 minute window and timings are that close then it doesn’t sound feasible for either child really. There will most likely be days when the door is opened a minute or two late because these things happen!

does the school have breakfast club? If so I would use that for both.

You’ll probably get away with it.

the problems will come if school realise you are doing it and/or if there’s a problem.

if she falls over and hurts herself or similar then the doors will stay locked until the time and school won’t have someone out there supervising.

as an ex teacher myself I do understand - I had to put mine in breakfast club for exactly this reason.

arriving bang on 9 would have been a no-no at my school as we had meetings beforehand.