My little boys birthday is 30th August so would start primary school only a couple of days after he turns four. Does anyone child go part time while in reception?

[Isobel1998]

Hi all, my little boy turns 4 next year 😭 his birthday is 30th August so would start school only a couple of days later. The thought of not spending any week days with him for our little outings breaks my heart and due to my job I often wouldn't be home in the evenings.

Has anyone got a little one in school who only goes 4 days a week? Is this allowed?

You say he will enjoy it, why on earth WOULDN’T you send him? Is for his benefit, not yours. My dd is an August baby and she went to school in the southerner street her 4th birthday and she absolutely THRIVED. She was the highest achieving in the class, consistently, throughout her entire school. She’s now doing engineering at college and has uni plans and wants to work in F1. I genuinely think her confidence would have been dented if she knew I kept her back a year just to make me feel better because she was only just 4.

I'm 30th of August too! However 50 on sat. Back then we used to start school in August so I was only 3 my mum says I fell asleep every afternoon. I always did fine at school accademically. I have 4 dvd the second dd is begining of September she had needed that extra year at home and flew at 5. However my DD who's an August birthday has really struggled I think starting at 5 would have been better. My youngest is a summer baby he was very clingy though so we deffered for a year so he started at 5. For him it was the best decision it's what he needed. He's confident bright well adjusted. However, and this probably isn't the norm, there was confusion about applying for high school we should have done it when he was 10 and again deffered. We didn't know so had a bit of a faff. We applied essentially in y5 he got his place we didn't however deffer he basically skipped year 6 sonis now in his correct year group. The only thing he missed out on was the stress of sats. He's doing fine accademically.
In conclusion it depends on the child but all but my eldest who was always strong independent would or did benefit from starting at 5.

My DB is 30/8 birthday. He started school a few days after turning 4. He always excelled at school. Straight As at A level ( this was before A * was a thing) and we t to Oxford. He’s now a highly respected architect.

Why not send him in on a Friday when you know he will enjoy it? He’ll be starting to make friends and won’t want to miss the opportunities to play with them and learn at the same time.

Thank you 😊

Our twins are late august born (6th birthday last week). We delayed their school start under the ‘flexible admissions for summer born children’ guidance. We are lucky, the school we wanted them to go to is council controlled as opposed to being an academy led school and therefore it was the council’s decision as admissions authority to decide whether to agree to delayed entry or not - as it happens, our council is an automatic ‘yes’ authority so it was an easy process. We had to get confirmation of the head teachers that they would accept the council’s decision and, for all 3 schools on our preferred list, we also got an easy agreement purely based on being late summer date of birth.

The second way it worked for us is that we would not have got them into the school we wanted them to go to if we had applied for them to go in at just turned 4 as we were just over 1/2 mile past the last admitted pupil distance from school.

If you were to look at them amongst their class mates, you’d never be able to pick them out as being older than their friends and the teachers all agreed it was the right decision for our boys as they are only achieving at expected for reception targets with support for phonics and numeracy which will continue into year 1. They moved up from preschool as part of a group with 14 other children so they already had a grounding with their classmates and established friendships; this has helped massively with them settling into full time school life. But they still had days when they would have an impromptu nap in the book corner - hopefully, they will cope better with the move to less play based learning when they move up to year 1 next month.

They will stay with their adopted cohort throughout their school journey, although we will have to apply for senior school a year earlier than for their classmates, then apply for the deferral to be applied - again it will be automatically approved but, until the processes are changed for senior school admissions the way they have for primary admissions, this is the way it is done - and it may be changed before we have to do it in 4 years time!

I have an August 29th child. They coped brilliant at school full time.

My late August born DD started school full-time and has been absolutely fine, but it’s whatever will work for your child that you need to consider really. I think holding her back would have been the wrong move - she’s done really well and the children in pre-school who will be in reception this year seem very far behind her now.

My son struggled through reception, he was “young” for his age and by year 1 he was wretched. Such a huge gap had opened up. He redid reception. He’s now post A level. Other boys a similar age were more mature and were just fine. Mine not so, he’s not super bright, just average (but fabulous and a wonderful son). It was the right decision for him for sure.

I think I agree with some PP, you have to do what's right for your child and if he is ready and would benefit from being in school that has to come first. I get it, I really miss my preschool activities that I did with mine and was quite bereft when they started full time school, you have to put up with this if it's in your child's best interests though.

This decision should very much depend on what's in the best interest of your child. We all miss our children when they start pre-school/nursery/school, that's normal, and to be expected but you adapt quickly to the new routine. Your decision should be based solely on if you think your child will cope? If you don't think so, why not? All children starting Reception (regardless if they're born in September or August) will be tired to start with. It's a learning curve for them, they have longer days, different routine etc - but they adapt! You say your child will enjoy school and be upset if you wanted to go part-time. I would say, that your child, will most likely cope. Children get the 'wobbles' on occasions, sometimes after a few weeks or even a few months. Again, it's normal.

This would be very unusual where I live in SE. Part-time will surely only disadvantage him further. Reception is learning through play, but they learn a lot and I think your son could fall behind if he's missing phonics lessons etc. Deferring is also very unusual, he'll really be too old for his peer group. He'll be first to turn 18 etc, when all his friends will be much younger. Keep him with his peers, he'll be fine. Your thoughts on missing time with him is a you problem, don't project that onto him. Make the best decision for HIM.

Plenty of times it's not about the mother, the majority deferred is because of developmental delays for children who then go on to need additional support, it's rare to be deferred and it has to be approved with evidence sent, often for being premature so children who should have been in the year group below if born on time anyway.

It makes no sense putting a child who has developmental delays into a higher year group, if they have an extra year to catch up with speech, social skills and general understanding they will do far better longer term. Our friends DC who was deferred was still in preschool rather than at home, it just meant that by the time he started school his speech was easier to understand and he was closer to the levels of understanding his peers had in reception.

But that isn’t the case here - op has said that ‘the trouble is that’ her dc will enjoy school and be annoyed to be picked up at lunch time. She said that SHE will miss days out so wants the dc to have Fridays off! She hasn’t mentioned any additional needs, just her own ‘heartbreak’ at not being able to go on weekday outings! She is also not responding to any posts reminding her that the priority is her dc and what is best for him.

He won’t be too old for his peer group - he’ll likely be 3-4 weeks older than the next oldest in the class; whereas, if he starts school days after his 4th birthday, he is likely to be almost a year younger than a number of his classmates. That is a bigger, and more obvious, age gap than an august born child joining the younger age group!

As others have said, it should be about what is best for your son. Does he already go to nursery? Do you think he’d manage ok at school?
As much as I appreciate that you want to keep him at home, this is about your son and you’re going to have to let him go at some point!

I’ve worked in reception and there was one little boy whose mum used to pick him up mid-morning/just before lunch. He always looked so disappointed when the office staff used to come and collect him, especially if he was engrossed in an activity. When his mum had college days, he’d stay all day and was absolutely fine!
Also, if you ask for him to attend for four days instead of five, he’ll miss out on a whole day of learning. Reception is very much learning through play but at my school, we also taught phonics daily, letter formation etc, so some structure too. Also, we’d celebrate achievements in a Friday assembly, so he’d potentially miss out on things like that too.
So basically, if you feel he’d manage ok then I think you should let him. Don’t hold him back because you’re not ready for school!

@Isobel1998 i am sorry but you need to give your head a wobble becuase if it is about missing stuff you have to let go because over time it is what happens until suddenly you have a person who can go to ABBA by themselves, go to Reading Festivals by themselves etc (mine is 16) it is normal but also if you play it well want to spend time with you

deferring and part time are valid options a good friend of DS was due October born August and is in the right year. Part time is much trickier because it is disruptive for them and you

if you have no worries about him you will have to let him go. I find that it seems harder before it happens but when you reach that point you are more ready than you rhink

he’ll likely be 3-4 weeks older than the next oldest in the class; whereas, if he starts school days after his 4th birthday, he is likely to be almost a year younger than a number of his classmates.

or to put it another way, if he is deferred, he is likely to be a year older than others in his class, whereas if he starts a few days after his fourth birthday, he will be the same age as, or a few days or weeks younger, than others in his class.

he won't be the only summer born in a class with 29 September born children.

If he's going to enjoy school and it's about missing having time together then this isn't the right solution for the problem - it's temporary and about you.

Instead of use this feeling as a drive to try and change your job or shifts at work so you get to see him after school, longer term.

A child is never disadvantaged by being the oldest in the class but there is clear evidence that being the youngest can lead to disadvantages throughout their school years!! This is precisely why the ability for parents of summer born children to delay their start at school until after their 5th birthday was brought about int the first place.

Some children can also be disadvantaged by not being exposed to enough experiences within a home eg exposure to books. That is why 2 year funding was initially brought in to help disadvantaged children go to nursery and get those exposures. Being kept at home for longer with mum/dad isn't always best either.

Deferring can be the right thing, but not if the reason the child isn't reaching the developmental milestones is due to factors in the household.

Does anyone know if you can still get a nursery funded place if child goes to school a year later? Thanks

@Sunshineandrainbowyes, my DD has had the 30 funded hours this year (turned 5 in July, starts reception next week).

I haven’t read the whole thread OP but I have never met anyone who regrets deferring and many who wish they did!

My son is end of August and part of me always regrets not deferring. He’s just about to start year 1 though, loves school and is doing fine with reading/writing. It’s more relationships with his peers, although I do think he’ll catch up with the social side. I think either way has its benefits/negatives.