Visiting schools

[Daffy18]

I know it’s early but I need to think about this now as my Dad has been diagnosed with terminal cancer so has months to live and I don’t want to stress about this in a couple of months and not be thinking clearly because of how ill he is.

Basically I have (had) 3 schools on my list

school 1 - closest with great wraparound care, but just didn’t like it neither did my DC. Im willing to do a second visit, DC not so much 😂 - LA will definitely give this school as catchment

school 2 - DC and I loved, they didn’t want to leave and keeps begging to go there 🙈 but no wraparound care until year 1. - church school do their own admissions highly likely to get a place

school 3 - I haven’t visited yet, but, has wraparound care and easier for grandparents to pick up. Problem with this one is even though it’s the same distance as school 2 it’s in a different local authority. It’s been over subscribed for the last 2 years never was before, but lots of new houses were built

My problem is my DC when they love something they love something and for example I can’t even get the to go for a second visit to school 1, so I’m torn as they love school 2 so much I don’t want to take them to see school 3 fall in love and then be rejected, so do I visit 3 or not and if I do, do I take DC? Or should I visit alone then if I like it take DC to visit?

I have 2 list 2 schools on my application. Help!

I’m sorry to hear about your dad. Looking at schools now might not work if you’re in the UK as they are closing for the summer holidays.

As you’re talking about wrap-around care and Y1 I’m assuming your post is about starting primary school, and your child is currently 3 years old.

So I’m puzzled about why they’d get to choose: this isn’t a decision a 3yo can make, and at that stage children are simply told that they are going to x or y school. For an 11yo I’m comfortable that they school choose a secondary school but a 3yo doesn’t have the capacity to contribute to this decision. So I would ignore the toddler’s views, and simply choose the best school, as they have an entire year before they start.

Is your DC aged 3? You don't ask them, you tell them, or just go somewhere and look and behold it is a school. Or you ask a friend to mind them and you go alone.

Fill up your choices, surely you get at least 3?

Go to school 3 without your DC and also revisit school 1 alone, although you won't be able to until Sept/Oct now presumably. I'd say dn't discuss it with your DC too much, make your decisions and start discussing it much nearer the time.

I'd do some reflection on why you preferred school 2. Often smaller schools can be cosy and welcoming and larger schools can feel more 'business-like'. However in each class there can still be a lovely community and your child will mainly be with 2 or so teachers/TAs who will get to know them. Also think about your future 11 year old as well as your current 3yo. School 2 sounds great, but no wraparound for a year and further away means you need to be certain it's better than school 1.

As others have said it isn't your child's decision. If you know what they are like when they like something why did you take them to the 1st 2 schools? If wrap around care from reception is important to go, don't view schools that don't have it

I’m with the others, I’d definitely ignore the opinion of a 2/3 year old here. They’re not qualified to make the decision and will be swayed by ridiculous things. A friend of mines child wanted to go to a specific school because the day they looked around one class were making apple juice. Is that a good reason to go to a specific school for 7 years? Clearly not.

Go look around them again without your child. Hopefully by the time they start, they’ll have forgotten their visit to school 1 (if that’s where you get) 15 months earlier.

oh and if you need wraparound, avoid the school with no wraparound. I found myself in a situation where I was struggling for childcare for a few months (school had previously advertised loads of spaces at wraparound and suddenly there was none!) and it was a nightmare. Had to move days around at work, beg favours from friends I’d only just made and consider moving schools half way through reception!!

Only two schools is unusual , use as many preferences as allowed. Agree a preschooler should not get much say and you should revisit alone. Put them in the order you prefer, even if another LA, but one should be where you are likely to get a place.

Find out if there’s a childminder who does pickups at school 2 and put it first on your list if there is. I agree though that the choice of school isn’t a decision for a young child.

I'm sorry to hear your dad is so poorly but honestly if you need wraparound care then school two isn't the right school no matter how much your child liked it. They are presumably only 3 years old so they don't actually get an opinion on where they go.

School 1 is your catchment school and has wrap-around facilities, this sounds like it ticks all the important boxes so that's the school I would choose.

Being a different LA matters far less than what the admissions criteria are for school 3.

Do you need to use wraparound care? If so, do you have alternative plans you can use for a year if you got School 2?