Conflicted about primary school for DC4

[Morbihanmum33]

DC4 is starting school. DC1,2 &3 have all been at private school. The eldest now have partial bursaries at senior school. Due to the VAT we told the school we would not be sending DC4 there, and have accepted a place at the outstanding local primary which is our catchment school. However, the school offered us an incentive to stay. It's a generous offer which we initially thought we would accept. But now having second thoughts. I was comfortable with the original decision we had made, the primary is great. Most likely DC4 would move to private at some point, once oldest has finished sixth form. We love the private school and they have all been there - smaller class sizes, great facilities etc. But even with the offer there's still a chunk to pay on top of the already huge fee bill. It makes it doable but only just. The whole idea was to ease some financial pressure. Feeling so conflicted.

If you’re comfortable with the original decision, stick with it.

Does DC4 mind going to a different school from siblings?

I also have 4DC. The costs do not stop when they go to uni, the opposite is the case. So I would go state with the youngest and see how it goes, especially if it is an excellent school.

A friend of mine went to a different school to their siblings and was terribly unhappy there. They could have been equally unhappy at the other school, but in their head it’s their parent’s fault for sending them there etc etc. There’s also a lack of shared experience with the siblings. Tho saving all that money obviously sensible option just something to consider.

It’s a tough one!

If it’s really not affordable, it makes sense to send them to the state school - especially given that it sounds like a really good one.

But I would personally really struggle with the idea of sending one child to a different school than the others unless it’s really unavoidable.

I know what a difficult decision it must be though. My eldest (of three) has been at the nursery attached to a prep school and we were hoping to keep him there, but are now thinking that we ought to go for state primary. We worry that the rising costs mean it becomes unviable for the younger ones, by which point it will be even more difficult to move the eldest. Our local state option is sadly not outstanding, however.