Addmissions have now offered first choice school for reception, should I move my twins halfway through reception?

[PostiveThinkingRainbow]

Hello,
Would really appreciate any advice please....!!!

We have twins boy/girl.

When choosing primary schools, we fell in love with our local catchment school.
The school is very popular, always full classes, very well kept, lots investment in technology, bright class rooms with lots of lovely work etc on the walls, very active parent involvement.
Nice location and easier drop off.

We were however, allocated our second choice school.
Second choice school does not have full classes, grounds are OK but not kept to the same standard, alot of the equipment etc looks abit well used.
However, the head teacher is AMAZING, knows all the kids by name and his passion to make the school great is obvious. The reception teacher has been great, along with the TA.
The school has worked out to be better than we expected, kids do seem to be learning, enjoyed trips and magical moments ceeated for them. Also alot of their preschool went too, so they have many friends.

However, our initial concerns of the area it is located remain. Despite their being many lovely families there are alot of undesirable. Mums talking with not suitable language, dropping their kids off then lighting a fag so I have to walk my kids past them doing so. At least 5 children in the class definitely reflect this in their behaviour in the classroom and take up alot of the teachers time. Drop off is nightmare as it's in the middle of an estate with barely any parking.

My dilemma...
Out of the blue had a call from addmissions today, advising a set of twins have relocated, leaving two spaces in our first choice school.
We have totally embraced the school we were given, it has turned out to be better than we thought, and the kids have created friendships. However, in the long term I feel the first choice school could offer them more and nicer families to group up around and be influenced by.
But it's a risk, will having to start again at a new school were they will no one be too much, they will also have to learn a different phonics program. Will they feel like they are always the new kids and not form friendships like the ones that they went preschool with.

I want them to have the best, but also don't want to upset them... what should I do???

I’d move them.

I was going to suggest that you visit the 'nicer' school during the day so that you can see classes in action but you're already going on Friday! Definitely go and see what drop off/pick up times are like.
Unfortunately, I think you'd be hard pushed to find a school without challenging pupils but if there are already behavioural problems in reception then this generally gets worse as they get older.
I wouldn't worry about moving them in reception though. They'd make new friends.

There will be 'undesirables' at any school (what a horrible way to describe other children/parents!) and children with challenging behaviour in every school.

The only reason I'd move them is if it means you can walk to school instead of having to drive. Being close to the school and walking in with friends/neighbours, playing at the local park after school has been amazing for my children.

My dts are now in year six and walking home alone, meeting friends at the park etc. this would be much more challenging if we were at a school we had to drive to! It's also great that because of going to the local school most of their friends live around the corner. Just a perspective from the other end of primary school.

Move them. Apart from anything else, they will have each other so much easier than moving a single child.

I would definitely move them

• a good headteacher can leave at a moment’s notice - new job opportunity, illness, change in personal circumstances
• poorly behaved children now will probably become more poorly behaved as they move through school (same for the parents!)
• your first choice school was first choice for a reason
• you probably won’t have an opportunity to move both children at the same time again
• they’re so young that friendships will have in no way been established. They have each other for support but will make friends quickly if they’ve been able to at their current school. Being new will be forgotten by the first half term
• the location of the proposed school sounds desirable for both social and practical reasons. Walking home with friends, living close to friends and eventually being able to walk independently to and from school are all game changers

I really wouldn’t hesitate!

I think it's early enough that it won't affect their friendships. My twins are the same age and whilst they have friends they extra like, at that age they largely all just like each other.
I'd think long term - can they walk to their current school alone? What is wrap around care like? What is the academic progress like from reception to yr 6?

I would move them and tell them gently on why they are changing schools. At this age they play with everyone still and don’t really have set friendship groups yet

I would move them. Part way through reception is fine and although you have a great teacher this year there is no guarantee that will happen next year. Also if it's closer handier for drop offs and ( it creeps up faster than you think) them walking themselves. Also what secondary school do both feed into? Is that where you want your kids to go? I assume this is all stuff you considered when you put the first choice school first so the only thing that's changed is you have a good teacher.

Why do so many people get so outrageously offended by the idea that some parents don’t want their kids around swearing smoking people? It’s not desirable behaviour and it shouldn’t be. Sorry if that offends you but it’s fact.

100% agree! Simply cant understand how any parent is content when their children are exposed to this. Or how they call it 'character building'.

I am not ashamed to admit I want my children to socialise with children whose families value education and respect school staff. I couldn't care less about income/wealth or if their parents are immigrants who do not understand English as long as they have instilled good values in their children. My children do have friends with parents who smoke socially or use swear words but the fundamental difference is they don't do either in front of their child and wouldn't dream of it near the school gate.

Definitely move them

I would move them, mainly for being able to walk there which will be so helpful when they're old enough to go themselves. I wouldn't worry about friendships- it's early days and they have each other.

You're unlikely to get a chance again of 2 spaces in this school so I'd bite the bullet.

I'd move them. They'll have each other, and also twins are also always a bit of a novelty, so they'll make friends quickly!

Make sure you get details of the phonics programme so you can help them catch up at home.

Do check when you are supposed to let admissions know by, it can be a very tight turnaround and I'm surprised that they've been able to let you visit etc.
Like others have said, don't stay for the head, they can and do move on, particularly if they are as amazing as you say. If it's a primary school then you have a lot of years still to go, this is the ideal time to move.

Have you been to the first choice school at drop off and pick up? How do you know the parents there are “nicer families” , you may find that there are more undesirable families at the other school. There is a very sought after school close to us, but trust me as a resident that has to put up with the parents at drop off and pick up I very much prefer my DCs less desirable school parents.

You will get all calibre of parents through out the school lifetime. You also need to remember looked after and previously looked after children regularly get prioritised over other children when allocating school places.

As for moving mid way through reception, lots of children change schools and are absolutely fine.

Being able to walk to school would swing it for me. DD's nursery and then primary school were a 30-minute drive until Y3. Then we moved and it was a five-minute walk. It wasn't just the school days that were easier but weekends too during the two-parties-a-weekend period, and school holidays as many friends were close by (DD was out of catchment in EYFS as the school was under-subscribed).

Is the catchment school walkable? If so I'd move them, if not it's a harder decision. Different situation, but when we moved 2 miles away I thought we'd keep DS at his old school as he was settled. I lasted less than a term before the rush hour traffic and parking drove me mad and put him on the waiting list for the closest school to our new house.
Coincidentally, the old and new school had similar demographics to the ones you describe. I didn't think it made a difference, but the new school in a nicer area has a very active PTA, parents who donate generously to the school fund, and generally more money for extras ( they do more trips as most parents can afford them and the aforementioned fund subs the few that can't). What it doesn't have is TA's in every class, as they can't use PTA money for this and have less core funding as have very few pupil premium children. This did turn out to be an issue for my SEN DD.

I’d move them in a heartbeat. 1 term is nothing - they’ve got 20 terms left at primary.

My kids go to a very desirable school in London with a long waiting list but also relatively high nos of kids leaving (going private or moving out of the area), so there have been 5 or 6 new kids in my DC1’s class and he’s only in year 2. They always settle in really quickly and it’s like they’ve always been there.

The current school sounds pretty good to me but I'd move them simply because of the drop off which you described as a nightmare. I wouldn't fancy a nightmare drop off for the next seven years.

Fast forward to when they go to secondary school and which one each school feeds into. That may sway you. I know it's madness thinking this long term but I didn't even consider it and now my child's older it's a biggie.

But from what you have said I'd move them in a heartbeat. You can't put a value on walking to school, impromptu playdates with the local kids and as they get older, independent playing with them.

Head teachers may leave and that can change a school in a heartbeat.

Good luck!

OP how was the visit?

I would probably move them, but only based on the fact that is nearer and that kids that age generally form new friendships easily (especially as they'll be moving with each other). If they were in Key Stage 2 I'd say leave them be as their current school sounds great, but 6 1/2 more years of an inconvenient school run would be silly now there's space for them at your local school which you originally preferred anyway.

However, don't expect there not to be 'undesirable' families at this other school too. What you describe sadly sums up the school gates at pretty much any school. It's also important for children to mix with people from different backgrounds and learn to tolerate others. You cannot shield them from the realities of life forever I'm afraid. They will hear swearing and see smoking anywhere you go. There will always be children who are disruptive and struggle to regulate at any school. It's your role to teach them right from wrong despite what they're exposed to, rather than try to hide them away from it completely (which won't be possible).

I'd move if the school run is easier and you know more parents at the school. It takes a village!

If the current school hasn't got full classes, that's actually a plus. Much easier to look after a smaller class than one with 30 in.