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Primary education

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Original poster

Thoughts & Help on year 1

6 replies

snoopy18 · 15/01/2025 10:14

DS is in Year 1 & doing well academically for his year.

We had issues in reception with him being hit / punched / trapped under a big tyre coming home bruised & more. They use to had out accident sheets left right & centre not just to DS but other kids. I thought perhaps it’s normal for reception but maybe we have got it wrong being first time sending child to school. He was in nursery part time prior but we didn’t have these issues.

He is now in Year 1 and there’s been several incidents where he has been hit / kicked / punched / pushed (came home with a huge lump on his head right before Christmas - had to take him walk in school only rang as it wasn’t going down after icing it) but also he is doing the same & we are getting complaints both from parents & teachers.

We have had multiple chats/meetings with teachers & feel like we are going around in circles to the point where I have requested an in year transfer but school has a waiting list.

Is this sort of behaviour normal playground behaviour for reception / year 1 or have we landed him in a rubbish setting? The school is an academy and has brilliant facilities etc but can’t believe the number of incident we have had so far. We are in a very mixed area in terms of backgrounds of kids & parents but didn’t think it would be like this.

Any insight / your own experiences would be great as I just don’t recall myself or even neice & nephews having to deal with sort of stuff in primary.

TIA

OP posts:
Labraradabrador · 15/01/2025 10:57

Definitely not normal or acceptable, and concerning that school cannot get a grip on it. Is it one or two perpetrators in particular or is it more widespread? If it’s a specific child or two then you can ask that your child be kept separate until you manage to get a transfer.

There will be troubled children in all schools and it only takes a handful of violent kids to change the class dynamic - we’ve had a couple in dc classes, and it is amazing how quickly they can pull in other kids that wouldn’t normally be rough / violent. Luckily our school is very firm on this, so it hasn’t been allowed to become an ongoing issue or set the tone for the group. I would be happy to write off an incident or two, but then would expect teachers to take steps to ensure it didn’t continue.

Not sure what you can do other than continue to complain and demand that they take action to keep your child safe in school. It doesn’t really sound like they are in control, though.

Original poster
snoopy18 · 15/01/2025 12:13

Labraradabrador · 15/01/2025 10:57

Definitely not normal or acceptable, and concerning that school cannot get a grip on it. Is it one or two perpetrators in particular or is it more widespread? If it’s a specific child or two then you can ask that your child be kept separate until you manage to get a transfer.

There will be troubled children in all schools and it only takes a handful of violent kids to change the class dynamic - we’ve had a couple in dc classes, and it is amazing how quickly they can pull in other kids that wouldn’t normally be rough / violent. Luckily our school is very firm on this, so it hasn’t been allowed to become an ongoing issue or set the tone for the group. I would be happy to write off an incident or two, but then would expect teachers to take steps to ensure it didn’t continue.

Not sure what you can do other than continue to complain and demand that they take action to keep your child safe in school. It doesn’t really sound like they are in control, though.

It seems to be a group of the boys from the names that keep coming up including my DS. I’ve explained many times to him of course to get a teacher if he sees a fight don’t get involved etc but I mean he is 5 going on 6 I also know kids are so under developed for all this playground behaviour.

One of the support staff also said he’s a part of the rowdy group which doesn’t help any. Rowdy and being physical are 2 different things i would have thought.

You are right though it does feel like it isn’t being dealt properly from number of times we have had things reported to us but also us reporting things to them. The teacher this morning stood and asked me whether this happened at break time or dinner time? As if I’m there as a parent watching she seemed very blaze about it.

We swept it under first few times but I am getting anxious even picking him up from school now & when my phone rings and it’s the school I am thinking what is it this time.

Totally get it about kids picking up behaviours and getting involved / being brought in to it but just wondered if it’s this common with so many incidents back to back

OP posts:
Westierd · 15/01/2025 14:53

How are the kids behaviour active parties etc?
probably the school are rubbish at supervising. our school is pretty rubbish as its not teacher its the ta/lunchtime staff. So kids dont get any behaviour support and its really shown with the number of asd referrals etc as kids havent been supported with friendships and playing well together

MyQuickLimeFawn · 15/01/2025 14:59

So this isn’t targeted behaviour against your DC, this is your DC being rowdy himself? The teachers need to have a few interventions to talk about how to act appropriately whilst at school maybe with the children in question. If your DC was being targeted this would be an entirely different conversation.

Original poster
snoopy18 · 15/01/2025 19:58

Westierd · 15/01/2025 14:53

How are the kids behaviour active parties etc?
probably the school are rubbish at supervising. our school is pretty rubbish as its not teacher its the ta/lunchtime staff. So kids dont get any behaviour support and its really shown with the number of asd referrals etc as kids havent been supported with friendships and playing well together

We have been to a few school kids parties & I have also initiated a few play dates whilst in reception. I think it’s important to see how they play in an out of school setting & get to know parents a bit if they do establish a long term friendship.

At a one on one play date at park,one particular child which we have had multiple things going on with was very much flying off the handle & play date ended early as mum wanted to take him home. Same child was taken home from another child’s party by his dad as he was again getting quite pushy / aggressive & then another party more recent which was at a soft play centre - well again there was an incident where mine has apparently kicked him on purpose though the mum was sat talking and I was shouting over at mine to keep their distance / observe etc. One of the other boys was also there. Soft play is always a challenging one anyway as there’s jus so much going on but kids dad messaged me when I got home instead of the mum telling me this at the party.

Absolutely not saying mine isn’t in the wrong - he has done things too but I do feel he is being provoked having seen the interactions in non school environment.

I do feel there’s issue with supervising to be honest like you mention

OP posts:
Original poster
snoopy18 · 15/01/2025 20:04

MyQuickLimeFawn · 15/01/2025 14:59

So this isn’t targeted behaviour against your DC, this is your DC being rowdy himself? The teachers need to have a few interventions to talk about how to act appropriately whilst at school maybe with the children in question. If your DC was being targeted this would be an entirely different conversation.

Yes so it sounds to me from what teachers / support staff keep saying / complaining about is that there is a group of kids who are getting like this.

I don’t think it is isolated as there’s a few kids / parents are unhappy with kicking / punching / pushing etc & going home complaining that x y z kid did this to them.

But it begs the question I feel - on one hand teachers are telling me DS is doing x y z but then today when I told the teacher that DS has said about another incident yesterday they are saying all the kids play and they end up kicking and hitting etc. So which one is it?

I find it baffling it’s every other day.

DS was pushed just before Christmas and had a huge bump on his head thag we had to take him into walk in for as he was confused & not himself. Teacher / Support staff when ringing me said he had a fall but no it was a push

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