6yo absconded from school - help?!

[KimberleyS91]

I'm looking to gain some understanding/perspective as obviously my anxiety is at an all time high right now and I'm exhausted from the last week.

Tuesday my 6yo managed to escape from school. It was a serious incident - he was missing for 30-40 minutes, walked home, met a stranger, walked back home again with the stranger, crossed multiple roads... so yeah, a LOT of risks and just pure luck nothing went wrong. The school didn't call the police when they realised he was missing.

Thankfully my son is safe and of course I am grateful for this. He is awaiting an ADHD assessment and this has all been added to his referral and they're looking at different strategies to help with his emotional regulation, etc.

Thing is, I can't understand why the perimeter of the school playground can't be secured. The gates have bolts but the main gates are open all day long. He literally walked up a set of steps and off out. No one saw him despite PSA's being "strategically placed". Access to the buildings is secure, but in theory, anyone could walk into the grounds.

I'm originally from England where I understand that primary school perimeters are secured/locked. Here in Scotland, that doesn't seem the norm? I've been told it's so the school doesn't seem "like a prison" and that there are kids and parents coming in and out at various times of the day, which makes complete sense... but based on this, how do schools that ARE locked manage?

It's been an awful week, so please be gentle with me! There have been countless meetings, conversations, emails... it's been genuinely quite traumatic but I just don't know where I go from here. Thank you.

After the Dunblane massacre, handguns were banned. Since then (nearly 30 years) it hasn't happened again in Scotland, despite the schools not being locked.

I found it very strange at first that primary schools in England are like prisons and you have to be buzzed in and out of high gates. Whatever you're used to, the opposite seems odd. Schools were open when I was a child, but most teachers also seemed to be more 'on the ball' than some are here. When did the school notice he was missing? If he left during or just before lesson time, a teacher should have realised straight away that there was a pupil missing. If it was at lunchtime, the teacher on playground duty should have been keeping an eye on the open gate as they were walking around the playground, or the school should just declare the area near the gate out of bounds at rececess/lunchtime. I'm glad your child was found safe and came to no harm. After this I would expect the school to review their safety protocols, like banning playing near the open gate, or keeping it locked, or having another member of staff on playground duty etc.

But a gun wielding nutter could get into the playground and that’s ok? That makes no sense.

I would check Scottish law, but in England it’s the responsibility of the school to keep dc safe ON Their Premises. Not just in the building. I would be surprised if Scotland is different and I would complain to the highest person in the education system. I would actually contact the MP too. It’s not acceptable for schools to lose pupils at age 6 when he almost certainly walked out of the gate.

Most schools work out that they will be at fault if a child is killed in their care and that the consequences for the head will be dire. Why run the risk? In England you don’t blame the child. You blame those who have a duty of care. Shame on posters and Scotland that blame children.

This is a major safeguarding issue.

For those saying it is up to the 6 year old to stay in school...it is up to the school to ensure he stays! Plain and simple!

Actually simiar to tickingalong the primary did have a child made gap under one fence (out of sight) and kids were going under and back...

After Dunblane, the parents campaigned, and were successful, in banning ownership of hand guns. They were also successful in ensuring all doors to schools are secure entry, but it does not apply to the playground gates.

If there was a 'gun welding nutter' then I highly doubt some fencing and locked gates would make any difference. They'd still be able to shoot the children.

Op - the school have badly let your child down. The children should not be able to just wander out unnoticed.

That seems crazy with a primary school. Even my daughters high-school is fully locked. People come and go all day too but they have to be buzzed im after identifying yourself through intercom with a camera pointed at you.

I'd be so upset OP.

Wow that's crazy, even DS's huge secondary school has fencing and secure gates. It's totally unacceptable for a child to be missing for that length of time and the police not be called. What a horrendous system.

It's weird that people say 'he should just not abscond', kids never used to abscond', 'you need to teach him to stay in school'. What a load of crap! My neighbours told me their (now 50) year old son used to abscond and run home from our local primary and during ds's time there (ten years ago) there were two flight risks and secure gates were put in because of them.

This is a child with SEN you can't just 'make a child learn' if they don't want to. How naive and clueless people are! It's the schools responsibility to keep the children on site safe not the parents or a little 6 year old with SENs responsibility. Some very bizarre people on here!

OP you need to go in and speak to the school and find out exactly how they are going to keep him safe. He could have been picked up by anyone.

I'm in Scotland and the gates are locked around the playground so the kids would have trouble getting out, it doesn't seem normal that a child could just walk out of school that easily.

This is a massive safeguarding issue. The school would or should be, reporting themselves to LADO and OFSTED if they were in England...

You need to look up the procedures in Scotland.

Do they have a safe policy on their website?

How is your little boy?

I actually find generally enlgands never blame the child unhelpful.
In this situation it was clearly the child at fault. Provided they have capacity to understand the rule. They have been at school over a year the kid knows not to leave!

Should the school have noticed - probably yes. But perhaps the kid went ot the toilet then left the building?
Should they have called the police - yes.
(I would have locked gates though)

My youngest used to run off frequently if she wanted to go home till about 4. At 5 she went to rainbows. Due to covid no parents in building first session ever. They brought the kids up to the road for pick up. And dc2 ran staight across -- to our car as i was getting out. Not a particukarly busy road and it was sunday but there are buses and view obscured by parked cars etc. So obviously told dc2 off and from then on we parked on the same side as the building making sure early for pickup. I didnt tell the leaders as (they hadnt noticed..) I didnt think it likely to happen again or to any other child. Over time they did move back towards the building in its car park etc so less an issue.

Honestly I would sew an AirTag into his clothes for your own backup in case this happens again, but yes the school should do a special risk assessment for him and deal with this

A 6 year old awaiting an ADHD diagnosis is highly unlikely to have capacity, so I didn't read past the second line of your post and thought the first line was unhelpful ignorant drivel.

If a kid can get out, then any nutter with a knife can get in. I’d go to the governors / council. You’d think after what happened in Southport this summer they’d be a bit more careful

This is a lapse in safeguarding, primary school in particular has more responsibility due to the young age of pupils to keep them safe. Your 6 year old shouldn't be able to just off and leave the school grounds.
My sons school in South Wales has a gate that is locked and only opened first thing in the morning to admit pupils and at the end of the day to send them home.
I could understand with secondary school as children are old enough to know better and walk home themselves, but primary schools need to have better security measures.

That doesn’t follow. Doors open from the inside, not outside.

Mine did this at that age during break time (twice - 500m home but requires crossing busy road with traffic lights). No one saw him leave. Both times my husband was home and walked him back but on one occasion they hadn't even noticed he was missing. I'm not in the UK and here fences round school are either low (DS jumped the fence), the gates aren't locked or there is no fence (my current school). It's the same with playgrounds - most of them have no fence or a fence and no gate. With an AHDH bolter this was super stressful!

This and another incident where he walked off from us at a crowded winter evening incident (he got lost on the way home, ended up getting a ride on a bike from a stranger to our house - we weren't there as looking for him at the event - and then back to school) were a huge shock for him and he never did it again after the 3rd incident but I dread to think what could have happened.

I hope the school will be extra vigilant with him now and just also hammer into him how dangerous it was.

This seems illogical to me. There is a gate, but the school chooses not to lock it. Putting aside the safety issues of any adult being able to walk into the playground (and in this category, I am putting parents who are prohibited from seeing children by court order or only at certain times, which most schools have a couple of families in that situation), why wouldn't you fasten the bolts of a gate at least at playtimes?

In the alternative, there could be a member of staff by the open gate watching who is coming in and out; however, I would think from an employment law perspective the bolt would be better because otherwise you are effectively requiring the member of staff to stop anyone entering who shouldn't.

I can't see the school having any defence should a child run out and get injured or a member of staff injured trying to prevent someone entering the playground.

It would be very simple to have a buzzer-controlled gate, and parents could be let in as needed. At my child's preschool, they had a gate that was opened at certain times for drop off, pick up at lunchtime, and afternoon pick up, and after school pick up. The children were inside during those times. All other times, you went through the main school reception.

I would make a meeting with school and the safeguarding lead and ask what measures will be put in place in future to protect your son.

He’s six???? Nothing about this should have been ‘up to him’!

It is completely the schools fault. They have a duty of care to safeguard your child and failed.

Now you need to know what their risk assessment is going to look like to prevent this happening again.

I would expect to see gate monitoring at lunch/break or increased support for your child at those times. Regular checking with your son.

I would make sure the local authority, board of governors and ofsted have all been informed as they are responsible for holding the school accountable for their actions.

Get everything in writing and if you are not getting answers - complain- head - exec head- governing chair - ofsted.

I would also inform the police of it hasn't been done already. So it is documented incase any future incidents happen

I am in Wales so I’m aware the system is different to England and of course Scotland.
The Welsh Inspection service Estyn is VERY serious about premises safety and security, both to prevent children exiting the premises and unauthorised individuals gaining access. (Recent events and Dumblane should tell them that.
Schools that do not have adequate site security are usually marked down or given strong recommendations to improve.
It is possible to keep a school site secure without seeming like a prison.
In my opinion this is a serious safeguarding incident and you should be making a complaint and escalating this outside the school.

Is this an appropriate answer about a 6 year old with SEN?

Stop blaming the parent: the school needs to ensure the child is safe during the day.

OP, why didn't they call the police? I'd report that to Ofsted and consider switching schools tbh.

I'm in Scotland and the gates are locked around the playground so the kids would have trouble getting out, it doesn't seem normal that a child could just walk out of school that easily.

And our Scottish village primary school has 4 entrances/exits to the school playground, none of which are locked. Apparently there is a right of way through the playground so the head teacher can't even put a gate on one of the exit points (it came up recently in conversation). My 6 year old could get from the school to the sea in under 5 minutes. Presumably most of her peers could too.

I would have expected the police to be called though. I know that has happened at neighbouring schools. I'd be asking why they hadn't. Has they actually realised he was missing?

Genuinely surprised at the number of people who think safeguarding procedures should amount to "rely on the child making the decision we want them to". "Tell them to be safe and no further action is warranted".

All of the arguments that the gates should be locked are pointless, as in most schools in Scotland it doesn't happen, and won't happen.

The issue here is the school failed in safeguarding your child. You need to complain to the school and MHIE. The lack of calling the police by the school is their second big mistake, after letting your child leave in the first place by not watching carefully enough.