How to obtain extra help for a child in reception?

[ImflightbutIcantlogintoday]

I'm worried about Ds and could do with some advice, if anyone knows the answers.

He says he was asked to speak to the class about why it was a special day, he said it was his grandmas birthday, and then he was told to write it down. I know other kids in reception can write quite well but he really struggles.
He said he just couldn't do it and all the other kids were watching him 'like I was mad' he said

He's socially fine there, has some nice (horrible and scruffy!) little mates and laughs a lot about them/with them, but when it comes to the writing etc he seems far behind and left out.
I saked if the teacher told him off and he said no, but she didn't help him write his news either. He was just told to write it down and didn't have a clue how.

This is the only reason he gives for not wanting to go to school, and I know he misses his friends if he is at home (has been quite a bit) He says he is 'scared' and can't do what they ask of him.

I think it's awful to tell a kid who clearly cannot write, to do something like that on his own and just leave him hanging there.
Furthermore they ban the use of the word 'can't'. He does tend to say 'I can't do it' and needs some encouragement to do any writing but he can do it if someone sits with him and helps. Albeit usually backwards etc!

Is this usual, or should he be getting more specialist help? I try and do books with him at home, he can do writing a bit with lots of encouragement but I am thinking if he had some one-to-one in context, ie someone at school helping with the actual work he is being asked to do there, would be a good idea. He can't seem to transfer the confidence into the school environment iyswim.

Btw he often (usually) forms words backwards, also letters and numbers are written backwards.

His father was dyslexic afaik, could this be an issue? If so I'm wondering why the school hasn't picked up on it.

How is his reading? Lots of children in Reception cannot write. My ds 5 yo is starting to get interested and is trying to write words phonetically but I can't always read them back. He is one of the better readers in his class so I assume the less capable readers aren't ready to write phonetically and many won't have good pencil control yet. Your ds needs his confidence building in this area so perhaps speak to his teacher for ideas about making it fun rather than a chore.

Really common to write things backwards. I work in a Pre-school and lots do it. Some do complete mirro imaging of their name - clever stuff!. Ds writes numbers backwards and letters and dd who is 7 yo still does the odd number in reverse. I don't think you have anything to worry about but please speak to the teacher.

Hi Flight - long time no see!

My DS was so not interested in writing in reception. They used to have to write their news do and his was totally illegible but he would still get praise from the teacher. Writing some letters backwards is not uncommon - DS still does with 'b' and 'd' and 'p' and 'q'. Whole words may be a different issue.

Have you asked the teacher what she thinks? I know you have issues about the whole school thing anyway.

It isn't unusual for reception children to not be ready for writing especially boys. I'm not defending his teacher but he could have been asked to write without help so she could assess his level of development in this area.
I don't have a problem with children who say I can't but I like to add YET.

The work sounds rather inappropriate for Reception

A lot of children will not be able to write. Writing also comes after reading. My ds could not do much reading and certainly not writing until Y2. We thought he was dyslexic - he wasn't but was a 'late developer'. He's fine now.

I think it's a bit early to ask for help yet tbh. See how he is with reading first - my feeling is that Y1-2 is the time when problmes may arise. I seem to recall reading somewhere that there is SOMETIMES an hereditary element to dyslexia, so may be useful to be aware.

It may be inappropriate but the curriculum for the Foundation Stage expects most children to be able to
Writes own name and other words from memory.
Holds a pencil and uses it effectively to form recognisable letters, most of which are correctly
formed.
Attempts writing for a variety of purposes, using features of different forms.
Uses phonic knowledge to write simple regular words and make phonetically plausible
attempts at more complex words.
Begins to form captions and simple sentences, sometimes using punctuation.
Communicates meaning through phrases and simple sentences with some consistency in
punctuating sentences.

by the end of reception... openeyecampaign.wordpress.com/about/

Oh dear Mrz!!!!!!!
Well, he's very good at inventing...strongish on maths...I think...

Dear Buda. Yes I do have issues! But am fighting them. I feel he may well be fine later on, and will catch up - just the school is quite pushy afaik academically, and I've seen teachers shouting at kids in the corridor before for not doing their work as well as expected, which always haunts me when he says anything suggesting they might be expecting too much.

Reading is poor too, he will guess the words from the picture and occasionally he might sound out a 3 letter word, phonetically, with much prompting...that's about the limit.

I don't mind if he is slow but would be really pleased if they could find some way to help him out when he has writing to do.

I can vividly remember being asked to do things I had no idea how to do, when I was older than he is - and feeling so awful because I didn't know where to start, and was afraid to ask for a better explanation in case I was shouted at.

Hope it isn't like that. I expect that's just me over dramatising in my mind

crikey, i think expecting a child in reception to write 'grandma' and 'birthday' is a bit much

DS is dyslexic, picked up on in year 2, towards the last term, which apparently is a key time to pick up on who is just slower on the uptake and how has learning issues. i would not worry to much right now about this..... but certainly talk to the teacher about boosting DSs confidence and making sure he feels positive abotu what he can do, rather than worrying about what he can't

Hi, I am a teacher and have taught reception. I think it would be worth chatting to his teacher and finding out what the approach to writing is . In many schools "emergent writing" is adopted. This means that right from day one children are asked to "write" - however, the writing could just be a scribble, or a mass of unrelated letters, or an attempt at phonetic writing depending on the stage of the child. The teacher then asks what the child has written and writes it underneath. The idea is that any effort is praised and the children think that they have done "writing" even if its gobbledigook!

This approach works well for many kids. However, there's always one or two who feel that they need to do it "properly" and get stressed out by this method. Those children need special attention and help from the teacher - not to be just left to it! Maybe this is the situation your ds is in?

A lot of boys aren't ready to write at five years old. Unfortunately the pressure to write is even worst in year 1. My son saw an occupational theraphist and she told us that its not a medical issue a child being unable to control a pencil until they are six years old. Many boys find it physically painful to write.

What I am about to suggest sounds mad, but a lot of boys lack the upper body strength to keep their shoulders steady enough to write.

I suggest that you enrol your child in a boys' gymnastics class. It will help to strengthen his upper body. Or if that is not possible get him to the monkey bars in the park, run about like crazy and generally be a little boy. Riding those scooters where you have to balance will help his handwriting.

Other things are getting your son to do drawing in a lying down position. (Ie. he has to lift his head and support his upper body inorder to see what he is doing, typically on his elbows. Or he could play twister.

Get him to stand up and draw/ paint on a piece of paper attached to the wall at head height. Or maybe he would like to play with playdough or kerplonk.

If you want him to practice letter formation the its worth getting to draw the letter with his finger in flour sprinkled on a table. Or maybe cornflour gloop. Get him to say the letter sound as he does it.

A book I found useful with my son is "Write from the Start"

www.amazon.co.uk/exec/obidos/ASIN/1855032457/interactiveda3324-21

The nice thing with write from the start is that the child is just having to draw patterns. It systematically practices the skills for handwriting without the child realising it.

I agree with ReallyTired ladders scramble nets and monkey bars are great for developing the shoulder girdle needed for writing. Check out if your child can make large "windmills" forwards and backwards with arms outstretched if NOT they probably aren't ready for writing.

Oh I forgot pencil grips help.

www.taskmasteronline.co.uk/prod-list.asp?CatID=5&SubCatID=63

I suggest that you get the Combi-Pack Pencil Grips fo r £6.45.

You might also try getting your son to write on a slope of 20 degrees. You could use a file binder, but there are expensive handwriting desks you can get.

www.taskmasteronline.co.uk/prod-detail.asp?ProductID=4313

Wow, ReallyTired those are fantastic suggestions, thanks so much for the links and ideas. I will write it all down and keep it on my desk to refer to

He can hold a pencil Ok - has done it well since he was little - but doesn't seem to have the type of brain that wants to deal with writing etc. He would far rather make a robot or something out of some junk he found on the ground.

Lulumama, I am surprised it is so late that a diagnosis is made, did your little boy struggle before that time, and did you think the school handled it well up till then?

TheApprentice, that is really interesting and yes, it sounds familiar - he's bright enough to know that his 'marks' don't look anything like the letters underneath, so doesn't want to do it as I think he feels daft making scrawls...he likes doing what he is good at, I suppose that's natural - I certainly feel the same!
I might try and discuss it with the teacher when he goes back. It's so hard to find a moment when she is free but I think it is worth it before he gets really despondent about the whole thing.
Thanks for all this, I'm glad I asked.

All of this drives me mad!
Whatever mrz says, screw the Foundation Goals. What do I care if they say what a child should do!

I grew up in a different school system when you start at 7 - nobody in my whole schoolife had a problem with writing! Somebody would have better/more beautiful handwriting than others, but everybody could write, no tears, proper pencil grip etc. And until 7, it was all about developing motors skills, coordination, and balance.

Now, that my own child is in reception in English system I am constantly having to fight an analogy of teaching a 4month old baby to walk. With enormous amounts of work/efforts/encouragement/etc it will walk by 10 months, but it would have walked by 14 months just fine anyway!

My DD doesn't want to write, I am not going to force her, and I told the school to back off. She'll do it when she is ready, and being a June birthday she is not ready now. And to be honest I have no problem if she is not ready next year either.

I mean, have a look around at how most young people hold a pencil and position their hand when writing. In vast majority of cases it's awful. Why? Because the whole school system in the last decades makes them do things that they are not ready for developmentally and they compensate by adopting a wrong position.

Same with reading. I'd rather she could have a proper discussion about what I read to her, and broadened her vocabulary, and could tell a story, and sequence events, and describe a picture vividly etc than reading "cat sat on a mat". What takes 1-1.5-2 years to master now, will take a few months when she is older and really ready. And all of the stuff we are doing to build her vocabulary, grammar, sentence structure, expererssion, etc will stand her in very good stead. Will be more useful than pressuring her to read/write now!

This is all for an average child. There are children who are interested and ready earlier, and there children where there might be a developmental disorder/dealy and things need to be picked up early to be worked on. But don't see how forcing somebody to write would be beneficial to anybody.

I think the school is being unhelpful here. Telling a reception child to "just write it down" is like telling a year3 child to "just explain the theory of ralativity and prove that black holes exist".
I think they are pushing him to fast wrt writing. Some kids, especially boys just cannot physically cope with writing. Do try the products mentioned above, friends DS is in a private boys school and they use ALL these items plus a few more.
And, if he feels writing is beyond him, boost his confidence by showing him heiroglyphics and see if he can make up his own and do a pictoral representation of "I went to granny's" rather than letters. He may then find it easier to move onto writing words a little later.
If the teahcer tells him to write something, she can hardly object to heiratic can she? That show real individualtity!
I do think they are pushing too hard for reception IMO. I did not write a proper daily diary in this way till I was 7. At 5 I was practsiing letter forms and copying words from the blackboard.
I have gone on to get a masters degree and have a good job, so writing sentences late did not hold me back!

irisha if you'd checked out the link at the end of my post you would have seen that you aren't the only one to think that a formal curriculum for under fives isn't appropriate. I was merely stating what the government expects children to be able to do by the end of the reception year (and what it expects teachers to teach It will be statutory in September so all children unless home educated will have to follow it) openeyecampaign.wordpress.com/about/

Like Irisha I went to school where you started at 7 and I don't remember any of these issues of children not being able to learn to read and write. This has been a great help to me in dealing with ds, who really hasn't been ready to deal with this until Yr 3- considered pretty disastrous in English terms, but he is still only 7! I fully expect that by the time he is 9 he will have caught up with the other children in his class. The only difficulty is supporting his confidence after years of failing.

I agree with theapprentice - confident reception children will make marks on the paper and then tell you what they say.

Perhaps your ds thinks everyone can write like an adult already?

Check with the teacher about emergent writing and ways to give your ds enough confidence to have ago rather than sit there frozen in fear because he's not doing it "properly".

At this age IMO the approach that works best is not to correct letters done backwards/random attempts at words but simply to praise the child for their efforts.

He will improve over time and with confidence.