Please help me. What do i do?

[Fah66]

Hi there i was wondering if you could give me some guidance. I have made such a bad decision. I applied for in year admissions for three of my children. The reason was one of my children was not happy for a while and i had to make the change because i started to feel intimidated by parents. I thought fresh start was what my kids needed. I was wrong. I moved happy kids from a good school where they could have helped and instead moved their school. It has been one week. I am a lone parent severe mental health issues asthma etc. i want my kids back in their old school. I am so broken by my decision. The school was right in my doorstep and i let bullying mums do this. I thought i was doing the best. I rang council in a state and explained and she said i would have to go through the process again. One of my three is at home currently. I am stuck in a rut.she told me the school is full. My question is if i reapply. And it gets rejected. On what grounds would i be able to Appeal. Will they have been taken off the roll at old school. I am literally so so so broken. Please help

If they've started at a new school then they won't be on roll at the old one, no.
If it's been one week at the new school can you just give it longer to see how they settle ? It might be less upheaval for the children to stay where they are.
Why is one of yours at home, did they not get a place ?

I think first you need to call the school and ask if they have taken them off roll. If they know they have started at a new school, then they may have done so, but it would be worth checking. If they haven't completed the process, you might be able to get the places back.

Secondly I think you need to pause a bit. Are you just panicking? What are the issues with the new school? A week is not long enough for your kids to have settled.

Thirdly if you really want them to return, then apply and go on the waiting list. Someone else might leave and then you have a space. You can appeal but I think this would be hard to win to be honest. Also what ages are your children? Yr 2 or below in Sept is likely to be an Infant Class Size appeal, which you can only win for very specific reasons e.g. a mistake being made.

Thankyou so much for your reply. I deregistered her because she was the one i was having issues with. So currently awaiting on an appeal for her as she didnt get the place. One of my them is autistic. I genuinely am so flustered. And i dont know what to do

I rang the council and they said the school they were at is full. There arent any issues at the new school. My children were so so happy at the old one. It was on my doorstep. Now its a 40 minute walk to get to the new one. I genuinely thought i was doing the best for them

yr 3 child. Yr 1 child and reception child

Realistically you won't get anywhere with an appeal for Reception and Year 1 in these circumstances (assuming they have classes of 30).

I would double check with the school. There is a slim chance the school being full still includes your children, if they haven't taken them off roll. It's unlikely but worth asking quickly.

If they are off roll, your only realistic option is to reapply and wait. At least the school they are at is ok and it's summer, so not so bad having to walk.

There arent any issues at the new school.

Then you haven't made a big mistake. They're in a good school. Yes it's further away but that must have felt doable when you made the decision. Focusing on how happy they were there isn't going to help, and wasn't such a big factor until now, so try not to let it overwhelm you and obscure the fact that they can be happy in the new school. It sounds like there's no places to be had at the old school now so you can go on the waiting list, and possibly appeal if it's not KS1 in which case if they're at full capacity, there's no wiggle room if they've made no mistakes, which sounds to be the case. It sounds like the priority should be the DC who still has no place, if you are looking to get them one.

This is what I would do
1 check that there definitely aren't spaces in the old school by phoning them directly.
2 work out practical ways to make your journey to and from school easier for everyone.
3 embrace the new school and make the most of it.

It's natural to panic that you've made a mistake after such a big decision, we all do it (school places, house moves, job offers, baby names etc, anything which is a huge commitment). You need to allow time for things to settle for it to feel 'right'.

Focus on your reasons for the move. Bullying parents doesn't sound like much fun at all. You will have to face them again every day if you return to the old school. If your children seem happy at the new school I would give it time. Forty minutes is a very long walk for little legs though and won't be much fun in winter. Is it 40 minutes there or 20 minutes there and 20 minutes back again? Is there a bus you could get?

Going back doesn't sound like the answer to me though and will be so confusing for the children. I would look for the positives in this switch. It doesn't sound like you made it on a whim, so I wouldn't be rushing to go back after just a week.

Your children will have been taken off role the day after they left if they're already registered elsewhere. It sounds like the places have instantly filled.

Thankyou all for your responses. I made this decision in march but i think because i have had to move them so close to end of term that i feel like i have been hasty. I am awaiting appeal for my 7 yr old for her to get a place. Its such a big change. Its a 40min walk there. Maybe quicker back as its downhill walking on the way back. These so called mums fell out over children. My child did this. Or they child did that. And from there one of the kids taunts my child all the time. I requested class change. Didnt happen. Wanted her to be kept away from my kid. Didnt happen. Then mums wud be in crowds whispering and looking and laughing etc. intimidating behaviour. So i made the decision to just get my children out of there. I could not move the 1 i had to move all three. The other two were happy. But now i feel overwhelmed and feel like i should have done something else and not move them. Feel so emotional

Stop panicking.

Years back I had a similar conversation with a friend who had moved her dc from the school mine were at to another. She felt very similar to you, except the school she'd moved them to was closer, which was the main reason for the move.
I advised her to wait a little longer.

She came back about a term later and said she was so relieved I'd persuaded her to stay as they were happy and thriving.

Even if you reaply to your original school, it's unlikely that space would become available for all 3 at the same time, so you'd still be faced with a 40 minute walk for at least one or two of them.

A fresh start will be better for you and hopefully the walk will be good exercise and a chance to chat together.

Unfortunately children do fall in and out of friendships, so maybe the distance to the new school might be good for not getting too closely involved in play dates etc. Meet at a local park occasionally or in the holiday, but enjoy not getting too involved in play dates, which I used to find a nightmare, as my DD was so tired after school and really didn't want them.

Good luck.

I should have mentioned that one of my children is autistic and is a risk on the roads. Hence why this distance has become an issue. I didnt think about it at all

Does your autistic child have an EHC Plan?

Hopefully the summer holidays will give you more time to prepare your case to your old school/new school/local authority.

It's understandable that you reacted in haste, but write down some bullet points, to save yourself going over the same thoughts and also to appear organised when you have to speak with anyone in a position who may be able to help.

Best of luck