Should I Be Concerned About This?

[FreddieFoxtrot]

Should I be concerned/upset about this?

Hi everyone, mum of a soon-to-be-five year old here that has just finished reception.

So we live abroad (Middle East), but go to a British curriculum prep school. My son attends a school that has incredibly high standards (sometimes not age appropriate, in my view), and out here they tend to put children on support plans for the most minor things.

My son is a July baby and the youngest in his class (by quite a long way - his classmates are mostly a lot older than him, to be honest). He also has a somewhat reserved/slow to warm up personality.

He had a tough time in preschool, we got his ears checked and it turns out he had glue ear. Got some grommets fitted and voila - his communication and social
skills vastly improved.

Fast forward to reception year, he's come on leaps and bounds, and the teacher stated on numerous occasions to us throughout the year that she was delighted with his progress. He has one good friend in the class, and happily regularly plays with the other children.

We had our end of year meeting/report with his teacher last week and while he's done excellently academically (his reading is basically Year 1 level already) he apparently has an issue with focus and following instructions (he becomes hyper focused on one thing and finds it difficult to process anything else that's going on). So he has been marked as emerging in his listening and attention EYFS goal and his personal social goals.

They've given him a support plan to help him with his transition into Year 1, and to hopefully assist with some of the issues with attention and instructions.

What do you think of this and how concerned should I be? Any help or advice much appreciated.

Reception teacher here. Please don't panic! It is most likely just down to his to age/immaturity. Listening and Attention is such a common one that summer born children fall down on, especially summer born boys. Following instructions involving 2 or more is especially difficult for children who aren't even 5 yet, and they need to be able to do this to achieve the Early Learning Goal in this area.

My ds was similar, including the glue ear.
He was diagnosed with ASD and ADHD in his early teens, but he honestly should have been diagnosed younger.

A lot of what you describe can be glue ear. The own little world, hyper focusing, not processing etc.

But it might not be. And from my experience the "he's a summer boy" reasoning reduces the expectations of him, which then means if he does need more help then he hasn't got it. So he achieves not as well as he should and what do people say? "Oh he's a summer boy".

I'd say be mediumly concerned. It's not huge red flags. It's not, don't worry at all. And keep an eye on it.
It may be with that bit of extra support and a little bit of growing up (and the glue ear should improve as he gets older too) he'll be fine.
But if he isn't don't be afraid to ask for more support and look what else can be done to help him.

And ds? He's doing A-levels, has a lovely friendship group and is about to perform to a few thousand people in the next week.
But the diagnosis helped him massively. It hasn't held him back, but has allowed him to fly safely.

I'm really sorry if your personal experience is to feel people had reduced expectations of your son because he was summer born.

Obviously I can't speak for others but any decent teacher would always treat children the same in terms of potential, regardless of age (and gender, race, social background etc). Reference to summer born boys in terms of data isn't people being dismissive of their potential. Well, it might be in September, if it was said like "well he's a summer born boy, so he's not likely to achieve the Early Learning Goal'. Reference to it in June though, after the assessment has been made, is simply an observation. Sadly, by nature, many summer born boys do miss out on certain Early Learning Goals as they're simply not developmentally ready yet. There will always be exceptions, of cause, but the system is flawed against them. They're being assessed against the same criteria as children born nearly a year before them. The system sucks.

Stating that someone hasn't got there because they are a summer born boy isn't reduced expectations. Saying they won't get there would be, but after the event it becomes an observation.

You're right that there could be other factors at play with OP's child so it would be wrong say say it's only because he's a summer born boy, but in most cases these children do catch up with age/maturity. They just need a bit more time. Understandable, considering the system expects them to perform the same as their September/October born peers.

As I said, I'm sorry to hear you feel that has been the case for your son but please don't assume every teacher referring to summer born boys has reduced expectations of them.