Is it too late to defer?

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DC started reception last September a week after turning 4, he is getting there academically but not so much emotionally.

I feel like we have been waiting it out to see if things improve, he has a nice circle of friends but friends come and go at this age.

Has anyone held their child back for another year in reception? If so how do you even do this?

Feeling overwhelmed, and want to advocate for my child the best I can.

You would need to speak to the school, as policies will differ. I work in Reception and only seen this happy twice, both times with children with SEND issues. I’m not sure those apply in your case.

Thats not derrring as he has already started.
You mean repeat reception and its down to the HT.

I dont think it sounds like he needs to repeat if hes fine academically and has friends.

Plus there needs to be a space for september

Unfortunately this is much harder to do this once you have started school. You would probably need to start the conversation with the head teacher and see how receptive they are. It will be even more difficult if the new Reception classes are full. Also, if the school do agree to it you would need to make sure it is official so that it carries through to secondary.

You need to talk to the school. School places have already been offered and they may not have space.

Honestly I would really caution against this. The negatives massively outweigh the perceived positives which is why it's so uncommon. He might not be there emotionally but that will come as he gets older. He's keeping up and has good friends, imagine what seeing all his friends and peers moving up whilst he stays behind will do to his self confidence.

The places for September 2024 have already been allocated.

If you feel there are gaps or needs speak to school. They can easily move children into specific lessons or groups that benefit a child without altering the school year. But you need a conversation about any development areas and what school can provide first.

He won't be able to 'defer' as he has already started. Deferring is when they start Reception a year later and then remain in that year group throughout.

He has started school, therefore he will have to remain in that year group. He won't be able to repeat a year without missing another further on, as he will need to move to secondary school the September following his 11th birthday regardless. Most schools won't agree to keeping him back as they know it won't be in his long term best interests. They only usually do it, where possible (ie space in next year's Reception cohort) if there's an EHCP plan in place and the child is waiting on a space at a special school.

I understand your concerns but many children struggle with their emotions in Reception. Holding him back won't necessarily help with that, especially if he has made friends, as you'd be moving him away from the friends he knows. Also, if he's fine academically he'd likely get bored, even if it was possible, if he did it all again.

You'd be amazed how much children can mature in Year 1. I would mention your concerns about transition to Year 1 to the school, so they know to keep a close eye on him and perhaps even put extra provisions in place to help him (social stories etc) but I wouldn't even ask if he can repeat the year because the answer will be no.

Some of the information you’ve been given is wrong. I don’t understand why people insist on writing stuff that isn’t correct, it’s so wrong!

It is possible. Join the Facebook summer born admissions group for help. You will need to have permission from the school so you’ll need to start those conversations. It will also depend on space in reception in September 2024.

He won’t have to miss a year. He won’t have to change back into his correct year group once in secondary school.

It depends what you mean by 'wrong'? Most people have acknowledged that it is possible, while also acknowledging that it isn't likely to happen without an EHCP in place. OP says her child is fine academically. Things can be put into place to support her child socially and emotionally without moving him back a year. No school is going to do that simply on a parent's request. If they felt such drastic measures were necessary they would have broached it with her by now. This sort of decision isn't up to parents, as if it's some sort of right (unlike actual deferral for summer borns, where you choose yo send them a year later). Once the child has started, it would only be extreme circumstances which would see a school happy to accommodate a child repeating a year group and swapping to that year. That's if they even have space in the next cohort, which many would not.

Unlike deferral, a child repeating a year group completely isn't usually in their best interests in terms of friendships, potential boredom etc. So it's not the case of people presenting 'wrong' information as such. It's more a case of I don't see the need in giving false hope and encouraging something which doesn't sound necessary or likely to happen from the little information OP has given.

OP, you really need to discuss your concerns with the school. Hopefully they can reassure you with a good plan for a smooth transition to Year 1.

I would definitely speak to the teacher and see what they think.

I teach Year 1 and have two little August born boys who are struggling to keep up. They can do the work to a certain extent, but definitely would benefit with more time for tasks or extra help from an adult - neither are possible most of the time. They lack maturity and struggle with the afternoons. I think Y1 was a shock to them