DD10 struggles to write paragraphs / stories under pressure

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DD10 in y6 is great at creative writing at home (writes for pleasure on the computer provided not under pressure), and a confident reader with a wide vocabulary but really struggles under pressure e.g. in class or homework. Almost like the pressure is too much and she can manage a sentence or two only in 10-20 minutes. Such that homework like writing a short story or a short essay is excruciating for her and causes meltdowns. School are aware of her vocabulary and reading skills but due to these issues don't really have an awareness of her writing ability.

Added to this she is paranoid about being moved down in reading groups etc at school, or given lower level work despite being a capable writer.

School are not a lot of help really so far. Trying to get further with them but they are much more focussed on the kids that are lower achievers in general.

Would welcome any strategies around managing her difficulties writing under pressure, helping her be less perfectionistic and managing her stress / finding activities or ways to do homework that is less traumatic and stressful for her.

Homework can drag on for days and cause all sorts of related anxiety issues (which we are also trying to get sorted via mental health support - currently on the waiting list).

Thank you in advance!

Have you met with the SENCO? My DD has dyslexia and one of the things she struggles with is getting her ideas from her head to paper. In primary she used a white board to capture her thoughts alongside a few other things.

(I also found school unhelpful as they would just tell
me she was ahead of her peers)

@GreenFrog13 I'm trying my best to chat to SENCO but the school are being deliberately obstructive (IMO) and not communicating properly with me! So am struggling to get heard at the moment and awaiting further discussion if they actually will talk to me.

I don't think it's dyslexia as her reading, spelling, speech, writing etc has always been strong but wondering about something else, poss mild ADHD. Again waiting to chat to SENCo if the school will actually communicate with me rather than ignoring my requests.

I like the idea of a whiteboard though, maybe something like that would work as a visual prompt and help the formulation of ideas a bit better. thank you - maybe we will try this tomorrow!

One of mine struggled with that sort of thing. She could manage easily as long as she wasn't under pressure, but she found writing against the clock really tricky.

We started with doing similar to "just a minute". Give a random subject and speak as long as you can on it. Doesn't matter what rubbish it is. We'd do it on the walk back from school, with us each taking a turn to choose the subject and speak.
Then we did similar with writing. She found it much harder because she's a perfectionist and doesn't like (even now as an adult) to potentially put something down wrong, but it did help.

The last thing I'd just throw out there, is can she do it better with a keyboard? Dd was better because it was easier to alter errors (her perfectionism coming in again). If so have a chat to the school about her working on a keyboard. They can arrange for it as a reasonable adjustment, even for exams. If you can afford to buy her own you may (but shouldn't) find the school more cooperative.

ADHD can also have these symptoms.

does she have feelings of perfectionism, or been made to feel she needs to be perfect. not implying you have been doing this at all, but thinking laterally. the root of the pressure is probably more important than getting her to do the homework.

I know this is going to sound sarcastic, and I don’t mean it to but honestly the clue is in the question.

Any person, child or adult, hates writing as you call it ‘under pressure’. What a miserable concept. I would detest being forced to write. You have said it yourself, she enjoys writing for pleasure as it’s intrinsically motivated yet not if it’s in class or homework. You already answered your own question.

It reminds me of how school often turns children off reading for pleasure by making them review everything they read 😜 Imagine being asked to write a review of every book you read. Knowing in advance of starting it you’d have to do that!

Get her to read out loud

If she reads slowly or sounds out the words or letters in a way that isn't the norm she may be mildly dyslexic

It's easily hidden and not noticeable

This would also explain why she can write more easily using a computer than pen and paper in class

I would reassure her that it doesn't matter if the content isn't very good, that can be worked on. I think the problem is perfectionism.

My 10 year old daughter is similar - always considered able at school and ‘no concerns’ but painfully slow and reluctant at writing. Things that are starting to help are using a Chromebook at school for writing, making a ‘quick plan’ on a whiteboard before writing anything (especially a mind map type plan), and not doing homework (it is somewhat optional in our school and more for parents, i.e. isn’t marked) so we just read a bit and encourage some educational activities ourselves that we think she would enjoy. These things are building confidence and that is key I think.

My DD can read well. She was always greater depth for guided writing. Her hand writing is immaculate, her speech has always been good and she has been able to bake cakes independently (download and follow a recipe since she was 8). The only thing you would notice is her inability to spell if you’l didn’t know her well. You can be intelligent and dyslexic… you just have to find a different work around a as the way the brain processes information is different.

Your DC may not be dyslexic, they may even be NT but it’s irrelevant in a sense because they are struggling and need support.

it’s not ok but in my experience you have to ‘make a lot of fuss’ to get anywhere. Insist on an appointment with the senco. Speak to the headteacher if you need to. They shouldn’t be ignoring your concerns. Dds school did very little even after final diagnosis. Secondary have not been much better…

see if your school run anything like a snap assessment which could be a good starting point.

@GreenFrog13 that's a good idea, I will look into SNAP assessments.

I am trying to press to meet with SENCO but the school are being very obstructive IMO with slow communication and will not phone me to discuss, just planned a meeting for 3 months time (!). Refusing to chat, frustrating as I think it could really help.

BTW I did not mean to imply dyslexic is not intelligent or anything like that. Apologies if it came across that way. Having researched it, I just don't think DD fits the criteria - always been excellent at spelling, fast at reading, writing for pleasure, good speech etc. I'm not ruling it out, maybe I don't understand it well enough, I guess I can ask the SENCo if they ever get back to me. I do think there may be a difference in the way DD processes info. So I guess it could possibly be an issue or something similar.

Also in response to some other posts - I am very careful not to put undue pressure on my child or high aims or expectations around achievement. The issues seem to come around pressure at school which seems to have ramped up a bit. Maybe a self confidence thing or something.

I've ordered some whiteboards and we are trying some of the ideas mentioned, thanks so much to all for your help.

thank you, I do think it might be something like this - I suspect I might have ADHD (never diagnosed) so is a possibility as apparently runs in families.

Having researched it, I just don't think DD fits the criteria - always been excellent at spelling, fast at reading, writing for pleasure, good speech etc.

This is me - was diagnosed with moderately severe dyslexia a couple of years ago (also have other ND conditions). Came as quite a surprise! So I definitely wouldn’t dismiss it.