Postponing 4+ due to illness

[IcarusFlies]

Very very anxious this evening as DS has his highest stakes 4+ tomorrow (highly competitive school where his sibling is already, but no sibling policy, argh) and has been poorly all weekend. Conjunctivitis then came on at 4pm. Any positive stories about needing to postpone due to illness? The ONE day of the year we need him well!!! I could cry.

I have no personal experience of 4+, or indeed the private school sector, and my advice is probably biased towards how outrageous I find the idea of whole process I'm afraid but personally if a school can't understand that a child is genuinely ill I would automatically be discounting them as an option for my family and I.

Obviously the fact your eldest is already there complicated things but, prestigious school or not, hopefully they will understand that little children are not robots and they do get ill. If they refuse to rearrange or make allowances for the fact he is genuinely unwell I'd seriously be considering my future with them (in terms of the whole family) if I was you.

What are your plans for your eldest if your youngest doesn't get in for whatever reason? Could you realistically get them both to different settings or would your eldest have to change schools?

Highest stakes 4+. Gosh.

Call the school today asap and discuss if they can offer an alternative day (some schools do, but others dont due to logistics). , is this a first or the second round? In general, it is not ideal to miss the assessment as they group the children as per their birthdays, however, if your DC is sick you don't have many options...

as a mother of 3 DCs in 3 different schools, I see the point why trying to get both kids in one school is important, and why missing an assessment due to an illness is upsetting (been there myself).

Your child has an exam/test to get into a PRIMARY school? Am I reading that right?

One of those private schools who will secure amazing results each year... all because they pick and choose the cream of the crop before they've even started Reception. But the parents will justify the fees by claiming the results are due to exceptional teaching 😂 Pretty easy to get 'exceptional' results when you're only working with gifted children whose parents are financially invested in their education 🙈

Not sure you can spot the cream of the crop at 4. Children develop at very different rates.

Agree with PPs - 4 year old being ill in January is hardly unusual!!

It won’t be a written thing. It will be an interview or observed group play.

Yes! A lot of independent schools do this. Children will be in small groups and observed through play. The confident ones usually get offered a place

Yes you should call the school. Some do allow them to attend assessments on an alternative date. I wish you and your DC well. It is very much high stakes when you have your heart set on a particular school. Some people will never understand! Good luck with it all xx

a lot of judgmental posts on this thread, indeed, on average teaching a small class of well-supported carefully selected children is much easier than teaching a mixed abilities class with some children displaying poor behavior and disrupting the educational process for other children. Also there is a high proportion of SEN/educational needs children and teachers must attend to the needs of those in the first instance (which I do think IS fair). parents are well aware of this hence they are paying extra $ (if they can afford it) and sending kids private: small classes/less disruption, etc. . Should we judge parents for doing this? perhaps not.

So many judgemental and unhelpful comments when all the OP wanted was some advice and help!

Just ignore the ignorant and hopefully you were able to reschedule the 4+ for your DS.

Thanks - yes, not exactly the emotional support or practical advice based on experience that I’d hoped for, but never mind! DS remains a little under the weather but well enough to attend, and I’m now sat having a tea before it’s time to collect him from his rigorous exam 😂 (they do play dates with puzzles and colouring, DS loves it - I’m the one having a stress!)

Good luck OP, you made a great decision, if he is well enough to play there is no point in keeping him away, play-based assessments are fun and interactive, kids enjoy it a lot

Op what happened in the end? We’ve got an assessment on Wednesday and I’m pretty sure my little one is coming down with Scarlet Fever 😩

I took DC and it seemed to go okay on the day. We received an offer but also feedback that behaviour needs work before Sept - seems like DC was barely willing to play ball. Obviously can’t be sure it was the illness, but the feedback was v uncharacteristic. All’s well that ends well, but I wish I had postponed. Hope your little one is alright and it turns out to be nothing….

Goodness, that feels like strange feedback! If his behaviour had been such an issue that they felt it worth raising, surely they wouldn't have made an offer in the first place? X

How bizarre. Are they suggesting that the place will be withdrawn if his behaviour is somehow not what they require? Otherwise, why even say it? As pp said, they could just not offer in the first place.

I’d be backing away from that school if they said this to me, they sound very weird.

There’s more context, which I don’t want to get into, but fundamentally the point is that the illness likely affected the performance, unfortunately. In hindsight I would have tried to reschedule.

I think I’ll definitely have to postpone if that’s the case. The younger sibling has just been diagnosed with it and now they have a temp so I feel it’s inevitable. Hopefully they will let me. Surely things like this must happen all the time.