To get a tutor or do it myself?

[ColdinNovember]

My DD 9 has a few gaps mainly writing and spelling but some areas of maths too.

I want to try and give her a ‘boost’. Not to blow my own trumpet but knowledge wise I could probably do the tutoring, the issue I how to go about it with her. I think we have different learning styles and I find it hard to gauge her underlying ability. I honestly don’t mind if she is not traditionally academic, I just want her to achieve her potential.

Long and short, have you tutored your own child and if so how?

I'd start small and work up. Get some daily CGP books and do them with her. Or the bigger ones with workbooks attached. It will massively depend on how she responds to you. I tutor dyslexic kids and have to pay for someone to tutor my own dyslexic DD as she doesn't respond to me.

The only way to find out is try it and see. But I agreed with PP that you should start small (15mins?). And as soon as it shows the first sign of not working, be ready to back off. If you dig your heels in and insist on continuing to tutor her when she's resenting any element of it, it will damage your relationship.

Suggestions - try to make it fun (songs, games...) And if you can get a workbook that "we can both work through together", it will seem more like you're a team and less like the master/apprentice dynamic.

Thanks I will order some workbooks, I have paid for Nessy but she doesn’t seem to retain/apply it very well.

she is in the very early stages of ADD assessment so I will give it a try and see how it goes over the summer.

Nessy rarely works on genuinely dyslexic kids imo. They do well on the app but struggle to put the learnt knowledge onto paper.
What is your child struggling with in particular?

Her reading is a bit behind but she has caught up somewhat this year.

Writing is her main struggle and it is affecting all subjects. She struggles with spelling and writing at length. Comprehension is not brilliant I don’t think. Maths she gets some bits but other topics just completely go over her head.

She really seems to have difficulty retaining things and applying them. E.g Nessy she will watch a video but won’t think to relate the challenge after to the concept on the video and make random guesses at words.

I'd get a tutor. Children are more likely to engage with someone else.

Get a tutor. Children are much more likely to engage with someone who isn't their parent and they know what they're doing.

Tutor every time. She is more likely to engage with a tutor than a parent and a good tutor will ge able to adapt their delivery to suit her

It really depends on the child. My Autistic DS works best with me, he couldn't cope with a tutor. School have been great, they've been working with him on his spelling and writing, but he only makes real progress in something he's struggling with when I'm the one working with him. It was the same for him with reading.

It sounds like it's possible your DD has a specific learning disability, like dysgraphia (writing and spelling) and/or dyslexia. If you do get a tutor you need one that is experienced in working with dyslexic kids. I think it's unlikely you'll find one with experience working with dysgraphic kids. My DS mey have dysgraphia along with being Autistic. You need 6 months of specific intervention where I live before you can get a diagnosis. I haven't started it yet but I've got the book, 'Stareway to Spelling' by Keda Cowling it's supposed to be good for helping kids with dysgraphia. The Author has a better known book for teaching dyslexics to read, called 'Toe by Toe'.

Thanks all, is there any tutor etiquette? I messaged one but current slot available not quite doable. Is it ok to try elsewhere and just let her know?

screening for dyslexia didn’t identify a need for a full assessment according to school. It is mainly a concentration thing.