How to transition to new school Year 5?

[Meixo]

I've had to pull DD out of an awful school, I only kept her there because she had a close group of friends. I spent money on extra tuition and she's doing well. It's a safeguarding concern I don't want her going back to the school.

She's going for a settling in session tomorrow at new school. She's going to have her lunch at 12:30 then attend for one lesson, she wants me to come which I don't think would be allowed. I would like to fully attend when she starts after half term. Should I ask for a few more half days of lessons and a full day on the Thursday, Friday is teacher training day. Before they break up from school or leave it until after half term.

Ex-key stage 2 teacher here. She’s year 5, not reception. You shouldn’t allow her to miss any school, so put her in lessons straight away and she will make new friends and settle in much more quickly than if she’s coming and going. Schools are busy places where children are kept occupied. I bet she’ll settle right in. All the new children I took into my classes at this age soon joined in as if they’d always been there.

My oldest went into Y5 this time of year (youngest into to Y3).
They had a brief tour of the school with me the week before they started. Didn't even know what teacher they were getting at that point, so didn't meet them.
Dropped them off at the front office at 8.50 on the Monday morning. Collected them from the playground at 3.

You literally put her into the school straight away. No attend one session; have the week off school and start after half term. What if she hates the session then has two weeks to panic about starting? Nope. It's like a plaster - do it quickly with minimal fuss. Also there's no way you'll be allowed to sit in on a Yr 5 settling lesson. Your DD is 10 not 4.

Never heard of a settling session. DS arrived a bit late on his first day, we all had a quick tour of the school then he was taken to his class, introduced to the teacher and given a buddy ( think it was timed so the first lesson was finishing and they went out to play ).

You might not need to worry.
DS moved to a new school in Yr5 having been bullied and never really made friends at his previous primary school.
He knew one other boy (but didn't like him!) at the new school and we knew that there were four other children starting. He missed the first day due to illness so I was really worried as I was convinced all of the other new children would have made friends and settled in on day one. The teacher rang me at the end of lunchtime on his first day and my heart sank but she was just reassuring me that DS was fine. Her comment was it had taken her a while to find him at lunchtime as she was looking around the edges for him and that the group his "buddy" was in & then the group the boy he knew was in, not expecting him to be in the midst of a group of totally different boys. He hasn't even looked back!

Whenever DDs started a new school...

Pre covid we had a tour a few days before. The move during Covid that didn't happen. First day, was met by a member of staff 10 minutes before morning bell, I accompanied them to lassroom, met teacher, and left. Picked them up at end of day.

I think it would be much easier if she just did a full day straight away. It'll look weird to the other kids that she's only coming in drips and drabs.

i Changed schools in year 5 when we
moved to a different area. Literally left one school on Friday and started new one Monday. Just start her straight full time and don’t make a big thing of it

@Meixo I'm in agreement with everyone else but also very recent similar experience: DS started a new school (also Y5) in January. In our case it was due to a house move and he was extremely apprehensive/sad.

We met the teacher the day before (which was an inset) only because of medical issues to discuss, otherwise it would be been meeting her on the day. On the first day I dropped him to the office at 8:45; collected him from the playground at 3:10 and that was it.

This maybe not relevant due to different situation but in case: he had a huge crying fit that night around 10pm (had been unable to sleep). No problems at the new school but just missed the old one so much and for the first time truly accepted/understood that the move was real. I was horrified and upset for him but there was no way to stay at old school so I just held him; agreed that it sucks, promised that he won't always feel so sad and waited it out. That first night was the pits but everyday since then has been a little better.

You take her for a tour. You then send her in full time on her own. I have never heard of such a lot of messing around unless this is a child with special needs.

And no they won't let you attend with her.

I agree.

I had a new child today in year two. He came just after registration, and was in the line for assembly two minutes later with a dc on either side of him that I can trust to look after him a bit.

Then when they came back I got someone to show him where his drawer was and that was the end of it really. It's not even a Monday so in literacy we were finishing off a piece of writing but it didn't seem to bother him.

My DD moved school a term into year four, from another country. She just started on a random Wednesday as we had to appeal to get her in. She hadn't had a look round or anything. She didn't know what a cloakroom was😂 and had to ask what wet playtime meant.

It didn't cross my mind to do a staggered start. That seems really unsettling to me. Won't the other dc in the class start wondering what is going on?

It actually went well I'm not going to go properly into but dd has had a traumatic time and was pulled out very quickly. She attended half day yesterday joined at lunchtime and went for a full day today she's had a great day!

Lovely update OP, what great news!

That's wonderful.