Choosing primary school

[LeftTheWashingOut]

Now that this years allocations have been made, I've seen some of our local primaries are listing their open slots to have a look around. Our little boy is just turned 3 so will be starting primary in September 2024 so I guess these are aimed at us so we can choose which ones to put as our preferences for him to attend.

If I arrange to attend one of these openings, is it normal to just go as parents or do parents also take the child? I'd assumed that we'd go without him while he was at nursery, but I've seen in some posts that parents have referenced having taken their kids to look around. I know it's important for him but at this point I figured it really wasn't his choice...especially as he changes he mind on what he does and doesn't like on an hourly basis! does that make me an awful mum😬

I would go without him, you will be able to concentrate on what you are seeing, and what you are being told without being distracted.

And it is your decision which schools you choose to put on the application form, you are the parents. A three year old chooses which t shirt and socks he want to wear, and if he wants his sandwiches cut in squares triangles or rectangles and other important decisions.

As above. It's your decision not his.

I visited schools without dc. It's not up to them!

I used to do parental school visits, and always sighed inwardly at the parents who brought toddlers, firstly the parents weren’t listening to my carefully crafted information ( I could tell by the questions they asked) and secondly they slowed down my tour to a snails pace because it was an old London triple decker school with many many many stairs……….

and yes, I know, childcare issues etc etc.

Don't take them at that age. They won't understand and will just want to stay there and play
You will spend the whole time chasing after them rather than paying attention to what the school offers.

Take them of you have no childcare but they have no input it really. Even at Secondary level they concentrate on a small bit of it not the whole picture.

No don't take them. They will get too distracted or they might get overwhelmed. I remember I had DDs place accepted in her current school and I had something or other to drop in and I called in with her one morning but it was lunch time and the school yard was obviously packed with children and DD nearly died of fright. In fact she absolutely loves playtime now and all the antics that goes on. But you get to make the decision and not them and sometimes with a school it's a certain vibe that you like or don't like and you need to trust your gut.

Thanks all, you have put my mind at ease. I will be leaving him firmly out of the school visits. He is not the sort of three years to walk around nicely - he will be distracted/bored and therefore I too will be distracted/not listening. The only real life mum I get comfortable asking without sounding like an awful parent said she was taking hers to "see how she got on" so made me think i was getting it wrong. But as a kid who can't even decide what socks to wear I don't want him to be a part of the process 🤣

Schools will do transition events for when the children are about to actually start. Open days are aimed at parents and probably won't include the bits the kids want to do like ride the bikes or play in the mud kitchen! They can have their say when you apply for secondary and they actually understand. Of course there will be kids there as people don't have childcare, but they don't need to be there if they can go to nursery instead.

We looked around our preferred school last July even though we knew we had no plan on applying for school this year for our late August born 2019 DT’s. We could have taken them with us but they fell asleep on the drive over from nursery so I did the tour by myself while DH stayed in the car with them. Was the best decision as it meant the head and I could really chat about their provision for summer born children, I could gauge their opinion on delayed entry to CSA and work on getting the school’s agreement - which we have.

The school then ran a series of visits in the autumn term for parents and children to look round and get a feel for the place before closing date for applications. The head said we could attend these if we’d like to or could wait for this autumn - which is what we’re doing. Thing I’m trying to say is, introduce your DC to the schools you’re likely to apply to/get a place at once you’ve had the chance to weed out those that don’t float your boat!