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Primary education

Join our Primary Education forum to discuss starting school and helping your child get the most out of it.

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Original poster

Year 6 class at war

20 replies

Hunkydorystory · 02/04/2023 10:14

DS is in year 6. Things have been quite stable in previous years with the class (one class per year so same kids since reception). Since Xmas though his class has gone from a group of largely supportive kids with some fall outs/quarrels/occasional drama to what seems like daily incidents, quarrelling between kids who have previous been friends, daily changing “cliques” and power struggles. The cruelness to each other in terms of insults etc is on a whole new level. The kids as a whole seem more emotional/ frustrated/angry and teachers seem to be firefighting one thing after another.

Anyone else’s 6 year class like this? Can’t work out if it’s transition stress / SATS anticipation / overfamiliarity / hormones or a mix of the above!

I’ve gone from dreading his primary school education ending, due to lovely supportive small school and class to now wanting the next term to come and go so DS can move on as we are dealing with the fallout of his bad days daily.

Anyone else recognise this in Year 6? Another mum has told me it was the same when their older sub was 11.

OP posts:

Are your children’s vaccines up to date?

Set a reminder

Villssev · 02/04/2023 10:15

I did a little with my daughter but no where to extent you describe.
and absolutely nothing like this with my son

Jules912 · 02/04/2023 11:00

A bit, but DS seems to have avoided most of it as he's not on the class WhatsApp ( though since his best friend left last year he's always been on the periphery of friendship groups anyway).

Villssev · 02/04/2023 11:24

Won’t he be going to same school as many of his classmates?

Villssev · 02/04/2023 11:24

How do you know teachers are spending so much time firefighting btw?

KleineDracheKokosnuss · 02/04/2023 11:26

Hormones, jostling for position in the hierarchy, realising things are going to change at the end of the school year…mixed often with a lack of basic manners
and empathy.

what are the school doing about it?

Attictroll · 05/04/2023 12:22

We are having a little of this to some extent I think of jostling into secondary tribes. Also a few kids not happy with secondary allocated. And exhausting sat mocks!
Some parents aren't helping where birthday party invites focused on those dc will go to secondary with so worth building a relationship with.

No real meanness effecting dc but I can see him being left out a bit by one group of parents putting future foundations in place who are going to have an ongoing relationship.

The teacher has commented that there have been some tricky issues and intro of phones to one group and those allowed what's app has led to some bullying I believe outside school time.

TeenDivided · 05/04/2023 13:04

If off to different secondary schools I think it is common for there to be a mixing up once schools are allocated, with new allegiances being formed.

dameofdilemma · 13/04/2023 11:53

This is happening to some extent in dd's Y6 class. (It's a through school so most will go to the same secondary).

The girls are forming alliances where it's a 'betrayal' to talk to another group.
The boys are mocking each other more than usual about football etc.
And more than usual competitive behaviour. Most don't even have phones yet, will be even worse when they do.

The school is trying to address (has spoken to groups of kids, tried to workshop behaviours etc) but not much they can do with 10-11 yr olds that are learning the power of being mean.

dameofdilemma · 13/04/2023 11:54

OP - on plus side it will get better if a large secondary. Lots more kids, most will find their tribe etc. Can't wait for Y6 to end!

Marilla1966 · 13/04/2023 12:14

I’ve taught Year 6 for many years and this is completely normal. They seem to spend the last 2 or 3 half terms rearranging friendship group ready for secondary. Even if they end up going to the same school, it is quite common to realise they want a change of friends and this always leads to arguments, fall outs and general mayhem for everyone. SATs, hormones and puberty starting does not help the situation. X

AnythingMuppetTM · 13/04/2023 14:36

My children’s Y6 classes did this. Is completely forgotten but oh, the drama.

rainbowstardrops · 13/04/2023 14:45

This was us a good few years back when my DS was in yr6!

There were about 5 or 6 of them who were thick as thieves for years and then all of a sudden, cliques started and falling out amongst them.

I also went from feeling sad that he was leaving the junior school, to thinking it couldn't come soon enough!

It was easier that most of this group were going to one school and DS wasn't, so that was a relief too.

I even lost a close friend well I thought we were close because she wouldn't have a word said against her child but I suppose she wasn't the friend I thought she was. It was just kid's squabbles to me.

It was all very dramatic at the time but I think it's quite normal really.

OnlyTheBravest · 17/04/2023 02:49

I experienced this with one of my DC classes. It got steadily worse during Year 6 and ramped up after Sats. A mix of hormones, new friendship groups and nerves about the end of primary school. I was more than ready for the end of that year group. So much drama and there was not much that the school could do, not for want of them trying.

greenspaces4peace · 17/04/2023 02:54

yes i believe typical. my dd's group was like this, and certainly more so than the boys at that same age.
i can remember getting a memo requesting more boxes of kleenex (we had to provide 3-4 boxes at the beginning of the year which btw was standard for all kids in all grades) but once in grade 6 the request was not just at the beginning of the school year but twice or three times throughout the year. i had to ask as i thought it ridiculous well the teacher (very experienced) filled me in on all the details ;),

SchoolTripDrama · 17/04/2023 03:16

greenspaces4peace · 17/04/2023 02:54

Every parent had to provide boxes of Kleenex?! Bloody hell that's a lot of crying!

SorePaw · 17/04/2023 03:35

y6 is well known for it.

okdest kids in school lording over the younger ones & all trying to Top Dog,

Tough on the outside, little scared kids inside - knowing that very soon they'll be back at the bottom of the heap.

hormones damn hormone's

knowing their friendships will change.

psrents being emotional

....

Iwillhavethefullenglishplease · 17/04/2023 04:21

I've worked in two schools (not teaching) and volunteered at another and, yes, Year 6's are often like this. It's getting progressively worse, thanks to social media and school staff are often spending Mondays sorting out issues from over the weekend on Snap Chat or WhatsApp.
It's also often gets much worse after SATs!

fUNNYfACE36 · 17/04/2023 09:38

Welcome to puberty!

TulipsAndDaisiesAndBlossom · 17/04/2023 17:15

TA here. I have seen this in every single Year 6 class! This time of year is the worst. They realise their time at primary is coming to an end. They start to get nervous but also over confident and they jostle for positions in the alpha friendships. It’s very tricky.
My advice is to tell your child to always be the nice one and never take sides.

JuneOsborne · 17/04/2023 17:19

Also sounds normal enough to me. They're sick to death of the sight of each other, they're cooped up in the same classroom all day, with the same teacher and they're being told all about big school, all of the ways in which it'll be great (with the implication being that primary school is inferior!) And they're so close to the end of it all.

12 weeks left.

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