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Original poster

Can I move my struggling year 1 back into reception?

78 replies

musicmumhelp · 13/03/2023 11:47

She's the youngest in the class and yr1 has gone from bad to worse, she's now school refusing.

What can I do?

OP posts:
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User923081 · 13/03/2023 20:16

OP there's 2 things I think you need to realise and I'm saying them to try and help you so I'm sorry if it sounds self-righteous or unkind...

  1. If your dd stays here then this will be her cohort until she's 11. No amount of grilling the school will change this. Is it really what you want for dd? Do you see her ever being able to thrive when she goes in every day fearing for her safety? Is this a typical cohort for this school's catchment or is it an 'unlucky' yeargroup? She might be a bit older and more ready to learn if she re-does reception but she's no more likely to thrive if she has to go through this shit again just with a different cohort. She'd probably do better just staying in Y1 and moving to a nicer school tbh. Based on what you've said my gut would be to move schools as well as/instead of repeating YR but only you know the full ins and outs

  2. I know kids don't and shouldn't get homework at this age but you do still need to do a little bit of work with them. Our dd is in reception and we read a little bit every day and she writes me a couple of sentences every day and I flash her phonics folder in front of her in regular short bursts. She's happy, she still spends almost all of her free time playing but that 10-20 minutes of extra learning a day done in short, fun bursts really makes all the difference. I also communicate closely with her teacher and visa versa so that we both know what she needs to work on. I don't mean to make you feel bad but if your dd is that behind and it's taken you a year to notice it then you have to take a bit of responsibility for that too.

I hope you can sort things out for her x

Original poster
musicmumhelp · 13/03/2023 20:22

ScoobyBooby · 13/03/2023 20:12

Is there an option to move her to the other year 1 class ?

No it's one class per year rural school

OP posts:
Original poster
musicmumhelp · 13/03/2023 20:26

User923081 · 13/03/2023 20:16

OP there's 2 things I think you need to realise and I'm saying them to try and help you so I'm sorry if it sounds self-righteous or unkind...

  1. If your dd stays here then this will be her cohort until she's 11. No amount of grilling the school will change this. Is it really what you want for dd? Do you see her ever being able to thrive when she goes in every day fearing for her safety? Is this a typical cohort for this school's catchment or is it an 'unlucky' yeargroup? She might be a bit older and more ready to learn if she re-does reception but she's no more likely to thrive if she has to go through this shit again just with a different cohort. She'd probably do better just staying in Y1 and moving to a nicer school tbh. Based on what you've said my gut would be to move schools as well as/instead of repeating YR but only you know the full ins and outs

  2. I know kids don't and shouldn't get homework at this age but you do still need to do a little bit of work with them. Our dd is in reception and we read a little bit every day and she writes me a couple of sentences every day and I flash her phonics folder in front of her in regular short bursts. She's happy, she still spends almost all of her free time playing but that 10-20 minutes of extra learning a day done in short, fun bursts really makes all the difference. I also communicate closely with her teacher and visa versa so that we both know what she needs to work on. I don't mean to make you feel bad but if your dd is that behind and it's taken you a year to notice it then you have to take a bit of responsibility for that too.

I hope you can sort things out for her x

A it's an unlucky year group

B at home she does reading, phonics and handwriting with me every day since because Xmas when her progression was raised an issue. In reception we were reassured it was just because she was younger and they weren't worried. I don't think they noticed how behind she was. I'm not a reception teacher so didn't know that she was missing targets.

We do maths and other homework too at the weekends.

OP posts:
ChildminderMum · 13/03/2023 20:28

I would move her.

Either to Year 1 in another school, or ask to place her in Reception in another school.

Fireyflies · 13/03/2023 22:27

You best bet is to find out whether there are any spaces in other local(ish) schools. If so then get your DH to come with you to just have a look at them - seeing how different it is (or not) may help get you on the same page about a move.

RedToothBrush · 13/03/2023 22:33

musicmumhelp · 13/03/2023 14:02

Hello thank you for comments so far. To answer some of the questions. I think she has no SEN. Her current class has more children with SEN than they know what to do with and out of control behaviour, one child has been expelled, another has been offered a special school and declined. Others have diagnoses (at least another 6 that I know of). I think the school can't cope with this, as evidenced by needing to expel a 5 year old. My child regularly comes home with bruises and black eyes and the teacher has admitted she's been injured "non accidentally". She's miserable. My child is quiet, kind and compliant and so has been ignored at lot in class whilst they firefight the behavioural
Problems or deal with the loud attention grabbing personalities, they realised in September she couldn't read even the first stage books or write clearly. I wasn't surprised - they'd sat her (the youngest child in the class) at the back and ignored for her a year.

I've requested a meeting with the teacher. Not sure about the SENCO or what they would do?

There are other problems too that mean she's either scared, bored or unhappy at school. I would move schools entirely but I have other children settled and thriving in the school in higher years and can't be in two places at once.

This isn't ok. I would be onto school screaming about safeguarding my child emotionally and physically and if I got no where I'd be on to the council and Ofsted. Or simply moving schools not repeating a year.

Seriously.

Your issue isn't about your child being young, it's about the class not being managed and your childs welfare and needs not being considered or thought of as important.

Fight for her.

RedToothBrush · 13/03/2023 22:38

musicmumhelp · 13/03/2023 19:49

The reason I don't feel I can go bat shit is that there is a definite culture that the children with SEN do whatever and nothing can be said or done about it. I don't see how this benefits anyone at all let alone the SEN children themselves.

When I've raised things before it's been <shrugs shoulders> "y'know" "SEN" basically lump it.

The children also seem to think they have to put up with this behaviour for this reason.

No. This isn't ok. Safeguarding comes before SEN.

We are going through this ATM. It's not an excuse they can hide behind. You have to word things right and start saying things like 'daughter is anxious because of the behaviour it's damaging her mental health' and 'balancing needs'. Because this is the truth by the sound of it.

Go batshit. Calmly.

Overthebow · 13/03/2023 22:48

musicmumhelp · 13/03/2023 19:49

The reason I don't feel I can go bat shit is that there is a definite culture that the children with SEN do whatever and nothing can be said or done about it. I don't see how this benefits anyone at all let alone the SEN children themselves.

When I've raised things before it's been <shrugs shoulders> "y'know" "SEN" basically lump it.

The children also seem to think they have to put up with this behaviour for this reason.

This is absolutely not ok and should not be tolerated in school. Children need to be kept safe in school and be able to learn in a safe and nice environment. No child should be allowed to injure another no matter the reason. I would be speaking to the school tomorrow and demanding answers and also looking at other schools.

Original poster
musicmumhelp · 14/03/2023 08:10

Fireyflies · 13/03/2023 22:27

You best bet is to find out whether there are any spaces in other local(ish) schools. If so then get your DH to come with you to just have a look at them - seeing how different it is (or not) may help get you on the same page about a move.

Thank you that's a good idea.

School are claiming that she's happy at school, but she's a people pleaser so if you interact with her she'll smile and claim to be happy even if she's not. If that makes sense.

OP posts:
ScruffyGiraffes · 14/03/2023 08:16

Schools can choose to let a summer born child start in R when they are 5, but they don’t have to.

No. It isn't the school's choice: they can only refuse to let a summer born child start reception at 5 if they can prove it is in that individual child's best interest. Which basically is not possible given that there's no way they can know better than the child's parents do, about a child they've never met.

Please don't spread misinformation.

However OP I think you may have a battle on your hands given she's already started this year, it would be a different process from choosing not to start at all until compulsory school age. Plus the deadline for reception applications has passed which will complicate things in terms of availability of places.

ScruffyGiraffes · 14/03/2023 08:18

musicmumhelp · 13/03/2023 14:02

Hello thank you for comments so far. To answer some of the questions. I think she has no SEN. Her current class has more children with SEN than they know what to do with and out of control behaviour, one child has been expelled, another has been offered a special school and declined. Others have diagnoses (at least another 6 that I know of). I think the school can't cope with this, as evidenced by needing to expel a 5 year old. My child regularly comes home with bruises and black eyes and the teacher has admitted she's been injured "non accidentally". She's miserable. My child is quiet, kind and compliant and so has been ignored at lot in class whilst they firefight the behavioural
Problems or deal with the loud attention grabbing personalities, they realised in September she couldn't read even the first stage books or write clearly. I wasn't surprised - they'd sat her (the youngest child in the class) at the back and ignored for her a year.

I've requested a meeting with the teacher. Not sure about the SENCO or what they would do?

There are other problems too that mean she's either scared, bored or unhappy at school. I would move schools entirely but I have other children settled and thriving in the school in higher years and can't be in two places at once.

Wow that is appalling. The school need to put proper support in place for the SEN children and enforce a proper behaviour policy. Totally unacceptable. What do other parents say about it?

Original poster
musicmumhelp · 14/03/2023 08:40

@ScruffyGiraffes

The other parents are also a tricky cohort for me. (And I have no issues with the other year groups so I don't think it's just that I'm being crap)

A couple of the parents of the SEN children seem oblivious (more concerned about being allowed to chain smoke in the playground at pick up), some are (rightly) concerned about the SEN of their own children and are advocating for that. Of the non-SEN there is a huge clique of close parents and very loud/boisterous/entitled children who seem to be coping academically, I think because they can command attention. There is one other who feels the same as me but is a teacher so seems to think the school/teachers are above criticism.

OP posts:
Original poster
musicmumhelp · 14/03/2023 08:44

The teacher parents are supplementing at home so their children are not suffering academically.

DH's latest suggestion is we get a tutor

OP posts:
Dodgeitornot · 14/03/2023 08:48

@musicmumhelp So your DH would rather fork out on a tutor for a 4/5 year old than look for another school where she doesn't get beaten up?

Original poster
musicmumhelp · 14/03/2023 08:49

Dodgeitornot · 14/03/2023 08:48

@musicmumhelp So your DH would rather fork out on a tutor for a 4/5 year old than look for another school where she doesn't get beaten up?

🤯

OP posts:
Swansong124 · 14/03/2023 09:06

How regularly are the injuries happening? It seems strange if it’s every week and serious that your husband thinks that’s ok?

TizerorFizz · 14/03/2023 09:57

DH wants an easy life! He’s not up for a school run is he? Pushedms the problem aside and thinks a tutor is ok. Farms out the parental responsibility. Just look at other schools asap.

Soontobe60 · 14/03/2023 11:57

Marchforward · 13/03/2023 12:22

You said children MUST but there is no must about it. The department if education disagrees and while it’s not the norm in England many summer born children start reception at 5.

Show quote history

No I didn’t! The “must” is in a quote from a Gov website!

Marchforward · 14/03/2023 12:10

Soontobe60 · 14/03/2023 11:57

No I didn’t! The “must” is in a quote from a Gov website!

Show quote history

Then the quote is in accurate.

Thesoundofmusic23 · 14/03/2023 12:48

Another one saying move schools and look at other childcare options. This school/ class does not sound like a good fit for your dd.

ScruffyGiraffes · 14/03/2023 13:01

musicmumhelp · 14/03/2023 08:40

@ScruffyGiraffes

The other parents are also a tricky cohort for me. (And I have no issues with the other year groups so I don't think it's just that I'm being crap)

A couple of the parents of the SEN children seem oblivious (more concerned about being allowed to chain smoke in the playground at pick up), some are (rightly) concerned about the SEN of their own children and are advocating for that. Of the non-SEN there is a huge clique of close parents and very loud/boisterous/entitled children who seem to be coping academically, I think because they can command attention. There is one other who feels the same as me but is a teacher so seems to think the school/teachers are above criticism.

It sounds such an awful situation. My children have SEN but it would be totally unacceptable for their needs to be disrupting or damaging the education of other children. The teacher is likely overwhelmed so I'd tackle this by complaining very loudly to the head and Governors. They must put the right support in place for the children with SEN - or those children must be found alternative provision with the help of the LA - so that your child is still getting a proper education. Her needs are just as important. Unfortunately schools generally don't seem to address issues unless you fight them, and the needs of children who aren't disruptive are often ignored because they aren't a problem for the school.

It's not ok and you need to kick up a stink about it. Aside from education, her experiencing violence at school is completely unacceptable and you should raise this with the safeguarding lead and Ofsted and demand it is dealt with immediately. Is the year below better? If so, it may be worth trying to push for that because the school may wish to comply with your request for that - given she's summer born anyway - rather than have you raising formal complaints with them and with Ofsted. But given what you've said to be honest I think I would be looking at an alternative school for her. No wonder she hates going and a fresh start somewhere else might really help. There may be before/ after school club somewhere else so timings of starts/ finishes are manageable around your other children still at this school? Or a childminder near another school who could do this? Or hire a nanny to do it?

I wouldn't be prepared to leave her in this situation and would be escalating safeguarding complaints through every channel.

ScruffyGiraffes · 14/03/2023 13:04

It's astonishing that schools think that bullying or violence should be tolerated by children when this would never, ever be tolerated by an adult in a workplace. And adults have the autonomy to choose to leave. Schools really need to be SO much tougher on behaviour policies to stamp this disruption and bullying out, it's made me really upset to think of your poor DD going into that environment every day. Flowers

ScruffyGiraffes · 14/03/2023 13:09

Then the quote is in accurate.

If you believe all Government websites are accurately updated in a timely manner. 🤣🤣 Okay then.

Or, you could look at the statutory guidance on summer born children and school admissions, that schools have to follow by law. And the multiple public statements from successive Education Secretaries about children starting reception at compulsory school age.

Anyway, not that relevant to the OP's thread given her child has joined a school cohort already, so different rules apply. But if after researching it you have more questions about it, maybe join the facebook page mentioned earlier which contains copious information on the statutory position and relevant case law and precedents, and stop spouting off uninformed nonsense on the topic.

ScruffyGiraffes · 14/03/2023 13:14

Just seen you have a DH! Simple then, you can move her: he does one set of school runs and you do the other. Or he pays for a nanny to do his share. He needs to pull his finger out.

sageandrosemary · 14/03/2023 13:21

My summer born child started reception aged 5 so that is possible. Whether you'd be able to go back to reception now after already starting... I imagine it might depend on both the school and your local council. Opinions seems to vary hugely.