Maths fear

[slmum]

My DD (7) is perfectly good at maths. But she's convinced herself she isn't - maybe because there are some particularly able boys in her class (and maybe because her little brother loves maths).

I was hoping someone had been through the same thing and had some tips for how to build her confidence back up. It's becoming a problem because she's becoming frightened to try questions, even ones within her capability, and certainly nothing where she might have to think for more than a couple of seconds...and anyway I think this is way too young to decide you are bad at maths!

Try to praise her for being hardworking, trying hard, trying without giving up, good work ethic.. it's been shown if you praise children like this - 'well done you are so clever you got all of those questions right' then they are less likely to try harder another time, more likely to give up if something is more challenging and if they do fail well that means they must mean they aren't smart (of course this isn't true it's just how our brains work.)

Whereas if you praise their effort then children are more likely to tackle the challenging work, trying different strategies, work longer at problems and that kind of thing.

So perhaps if you are telling her she is clever and is really good at maths, maybe switch your praise round a bit and start praising her effort, not her results.

If you are already doing that, perhaps buy some maths workbooks for the year below her age (without her realising if possible) and have her do a couple of pages at the weekend and hopefully she'll fly through the questions and it'll give her a confidence boost.

if she can get full marks in all the maths exams.
If she understands everything the teacher said.
I don't see why she convinced herself she isn't perfectly good at maths.

what is "perfectly good" mean to you and "perfectly good" mean to her?

Is she copying a friend at school? It feels a bit like it could be an affectation rather than her believing it to be true, but it could become a self fulfilling prophecy so I think you're right to want to stop it.

If my DC say this, I tell them there's no such thing as bad at maths, you just need practice. And I role model being a woman who uses maths successfully in recipes, money etc too.

Maybe she’s just aware that she finds doing maths work at school harder than she finds other work. I don’t think telling her that she is perfectly good at maths will help in that situation, you need to acknowledge that she finds it more challenging and let her know that that’s ok. As others have said, praise her for her effort more than you praise her for her results.

I'd echo what others have said. Explain to her that maths is something you master through practice and everyone can be good at maths.

My DD plays an instrument and its done wonders for instilling a growth mindset. All I have to do is remind her where she started and where practice got her and it fills her with confidence to chip away at other things.

Thank you - some very good advice.