I will try and keep this short but would appreciate advice.
DD goes to small village school, yr1/2 class mix. During reception there were friendship issues, class size is 11, only 3 girls...my dd became the odd girl out (tomboy liked playing with boys and my dd is young for her age). Towards the end of reception she tried hard to play with the 2 girls but they teased her and a couple of times she reacted to the teasing and pinched the older girl. At the end of reception one girl moved house and left the school.
I was hoping the girls would get on this year even though they are different , my dd is an academic and doing extremely well , other girl is sporty and talented in other respects. However, things have not improved, in fact they have deteriated more. Other girl has been telling the yr2 girls/ reception girls not to play with my daughter because she pinches (she pinched on 2 occasions last yr after teasing and it is out of character)...I've now accepted that the girls won't get on but everytime my daughter plays with a girl at school the other classmate makes a beeline to worn the girl away from my daughter...there now seems to be a cliche of the 5 yr1/2 girls who are not very pleasant to my daughter and last week they all pushed her against a fence and tried to exclude her out of a bigger group game (fortunately yr3 girls stuck up for my daughter and insisted she was included). I also think one of dd's classmate's yr2 friends has taken my dd's doll out of her shoe ...because she now has 2 and my dd's has gone missing.
Dd's dad wrote a not to heavy note to the school...saying that he appreciated that kids are kids but wasn't happy about our dd being pushed against a fence by a group. Dd has a very close boyfriend within the class who she plays with really well and also gets on with the other boy's in the class too so she's not without friends ...just lacks girl friends.
DD's teacher had a word with my daughter highlighting that she must speak out if incidents happen and I also understand the other girls were spoken too...which is not the way I would have handled it given that it seems to have created a bigger rift...i would have preferred a general anti bullying assembly where certain types of behaviour were highlighted on a whole school basis (oly 54 kids in school)
It's parents evening in a few weeks time and I don't want to slate the other child off but I do think some of her behaviour should
be known....dd fell over in class and the other girl laughed and said I'm glad you fell over and I hope it hurt because I hate you ..my dd has shared her fruit with the other girl on lots of occasions and the other girl virtually takes it all...sounds probably trival but when it's persistent unkind behaviour it's not very pleasant.
It just seems odd that kids can get away with awful verbal bullying...so far my daughter seems ok, she has a sunny attitude and whilst she does not appear as happy as she was ...she is still enjoying school and has lots of friends out of school ...Rainbows and Dancing etc.
I know the reception pinching incidents didn't help my dd (no other incidents since)...but she also got pinched and bit by other kids but they are still young and learning what is and isn't acceptable behaviour.
It was also intersting this morning to note that when none of the girls were selected to read with me (but maybe thats just me)
Any advice or thoughts on this situation would be gratful!