August born- advice on holding back a year?

[Arlr]

My son is born in August. He will have just turned 4 when he's due to start school next year (2023)- making him the youngest of the year.

I've seen research about how kids with summer birthdays are more likely to struggle academically and socially throughout their school years- understandably so. My son is also tiny (v short) for his age, and emotionally quite behind (though I know a lot can change in a year).

I'm from USA where holding back a year is very common. I have family members who have done the same with advice being "give them the gift of childhood" which resonates with me and our sons position.

Just wondering as I've heard very mixed things from parent friends here in the UK- ranging from it bit being possible, to it being common practice just a bit of a faff with admin initially...

question is: any advice? is this possible? Any tips for pursing this?

You know your child and are best placed to make the right decision.

We delayed school entry for a year as DC was very small and young in terms of development. It was the best decision as even though he's oldest he's still struggling compared to his new cohort (he now has an EHCP too).

The ease of getting "permission" to delay will depend on where you live, but the Facebook group is the best place to go for advice.

Delayed my son and it has been the best decision. Lots of parents will say their summer-born is doing fine at school but unless they are in the classroom, they cannot know this. I work in a a year two class and you can easily pick out the majority of summer-born children. Why not give them an extra year to mature and develop, we are one of the very few countries who put children informal education at 4 - most other countries it's 6

Btw- remember that your August baby will be (of his/her classmates)
The last to have their Xth birthday each year
The last to get driving lessons
The last to get into clubs/ pubs (without fake ID)

or conversely would be the first if deferred.

Speaking from experience these things do matter, particularly for teenagers (which I know must seem a very long way off!)

Sorry to hijack the thread OP but I was just wondering if anyone could tell me how this works in practice, specifically regarding timing. When do you have to decide to defer by? Can you, say, go through the usual application process and then decide in the June that they're not ready to start in September? Or do you have to decide in the January that you're not going to apply for a place for them that year at all?

In our area you apply as normal, contact schools you're interested in to get their support, and complete the paperwork for your Local Authority and submit this at the same time as your school application.

They discuss the application around the time of school place allocation and let you know what they decide.

Thank you everyone for your words of wisdom and advice- it's been really helpful to read through!!

We delayed and it was absolutely the right decision. The difference in him after that year was massive, and i had no concerns when he started. Had he gone at just turned 4 he would have really struggled emotionally.

He’s just started Year 3 and loves school. Other parents know he is a little older (he is August born) and nobody bats an eyelid - in fact one of his friends’ parents are planning to delay their august born youngest child.

Only thing to be careful of is the impact it might have on senior school applications and sports teams. DNephew was kept back because he was August born and it was a bit of nightmare when he wanted to participate in sport outside of school because sometimes they are very strict about a child being within the correct age range - it meant he had to join a cricket/football/rugby team with kids from the year above. He’s a pretty talented boy so this wasn’t actually a problem in the end but it might have been bad he not been confident enough. He was also educated privately and a fair number of the schools he wanted to apply for in year 7 would not even consider his application because he was “out of year”. This was south west London though where getting into private senior schools for boys is a bit of a bunfight anyway so might not reflect the rest of the country. I and sure it’s not an issue on the state sector. Small considerations in the grand scheme of things.

Interesting you say this as this was one of my DH’s reasons for deferring our summer born DS. DH was an August baby & a late bloomer & went to boarding school, all of which combined to make a traumatic experience of puberty!

In NI the cut off for the school year is end of June so summer borns all start at 5, and even the youngest is 4.2. I deferred my DD (July born, lives in England) and it was absolutely right for her. She is in the same year group as her cousin in NI who was born the following October. I was the youngest in my year and hated it. Not able to get into clubs for 18th birthdays, not able to start driving lessons when most of the year had licences, I was very young to head off to uni.

Same here. Didn't hold back. I accepted that the first few years there'd be a marked difference in how they'd cope with stamina and but they're catching up. Academically, both are top in English and maths.

I'll add they're both DDs. I understand DSs mature later which I would take into consideration. Furthermore, you'd need a cooperative, supportive and well-informed teaching team who understand the struggles. In my experience, not all do.

As someone who works in early years within a school setting and who has studied child development in-depth I utterly disagree. Many summer born children are not emotionally ready for school and it can be a real struggle. If you look at other countries it is common that children don’t start school until 6/7 and they are much stronger learners. Play is a hugely important part of children’s learning and development and unfortunately it is not valued enough in this country.

Im new to the forum and was trying to reply to someone’s comment on here about how children shouldn’t be allowed to defer unless for a medical reason but not sure how to reply so my above response probably doesn’t make sense 🙄

I see both sides to this, the positives highlighted throughout this thread... but someone has to be the youngest - my eldest two are both summer babies (both were socially very confident so didnt even consider holding them back a year) - there is a boy in my eldests class who is over a year older than a few of the August borns so there is a part of me that thinks that deferring just has more of an impact on the kids that dont defer. I totally get it is right for some children, but the argument seems to be about being the oldest and the benefits that come with that rather than the fact that maybe kids just start school too early.

It is a complicated decision. I have two summer born boys who both started school just after their fourth birthdays. I think that initially they were too young physically, emotionally, academically and socially to start full time school. However, now that they are older I think that they would have been bored and frustrated in the year below, particularly my younger boy. It is difficult to know how they will change and develop as they grow.

How did you assess whether he was ready or not? I have an august born son but not sure how to tell if he’s ready or not to start school / if better to hold him back or send him with his year.

Remember that many secondary schools won't take them out of their correct groups even if the primaries approve this. This is especially true for many academies. You may have to end up missing year 6 or year 7.

Wow really? I didn't know this. We deferred but local authority said they would honour this in secondary too.

This with bells on, but how it tends to work in my area is that once you have finished Year 4 you have to jump straight to Year 6 so you finish with your age cohort as secondary won’t take you with the deferred cohort. It would massively put me off ever deferring.

Thanks for all the responses.

For anyone else that may be interested, I've joined the Facebook group "Flexible School Admissions for Summer Born children".
It has been hugely helpful with so much up to date information and knowledge on policy and legislation for summer borns, and reassuring when it comes to the points about transition to secondary school. I'd highly recommend for anyone considering this pathway.

Since writing this post, my son has been approved delayed CSA start, so he'll be starting reception in 2024 rather than 2023. It's a very individual decision. for us, we've decided to give him the gift of time with an extra year in preschool, and hopefully he thrives rather than survives at school.

He has lots of preschool classmates that are only a couple weeks older than him (ie September birthdays) in his new adopted cohort which is reassuring.

Thanks all!

I have an end of July baby who will start this September. The reasons we chose to carry on were based on her current development in comparison to older peers, starting with her nursery peer group through the transition, and the choice of school. Our preferred school is a very play focussed infant school and quite an extension of nursery, other schools were more traditional with lots of 'sitting down' learning at a very young age.

Her challenge I expect will be the transition itself which is why I'd rather she go with her friendship group. She is already learning name writing, number writing etc so academically I think she'll be fine if she starts in the right environment to maintain her confidence.

I had always thought I would prefer to hold her back a year, but having seen the school and looked at her more objectively we decided she should go.

If I thought she wasn't ready socially, emotionally then I would still consider holding back but it really depends on the child, their experience so far in nursery/preschool and the school itself.